The Relaxed Male
Bryan Goodwin
The Relaxed Male is a podcast dedicated to empowering men to build healthier, more fulfilling relationships in all areas of their lives. Whether it's romantic partnerships, family bonds, friendships, or professional connections, this show provides insights and actionable advice for building and maintaining positive relationships grounded in mutual understanding, respect, and care.
Each episode delves into the unique challenges and opportunities men face when it comes to fostering meaningful connections. The host Bryan assists men in understanding how the elements of how one approaches a problem can hinder relationship growth.
Through thought-provoking discussions, real-life examples, and practical exercises, listeners gain...
When You Cheat
In this episode of The Relaxed Male, host Bryan Goodwin tackles a tough question of the month from a listener named Marty, who finds himself in a difficult situation after cheating on his wife of nine years. With two young children and the possibility of another child on the way with the woman he cheated with, Marty seeks advice on how to confess to his wife and work towards regaining her trust. Brian shares insights from his own experiences and offers guidance on navigating the aftermath of inf
When Life Doesn't Go Right
In this episode of The Relaxed Male, host Bryan Goodwin takes listeners on a reflective journey as he navigates the challenges of unmet expectations and life not going according to plan. Broadcasting from his truck, Bryan shares personal insights and experiences from the past few years, discussing the hurdles he has faced in his coaching business and the lessons learned along the way. He candidly explores the concept of success, the struggle with imposter syndrome, and the importance of redefini
Is physical intimacy important for fortifying emotional intimacy?
In this episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve into the complex relationship between physical intimacy and emotional connection. Host Bryan Goodwin shares his personal experiences and insights on how different types of intimacy, including physical, emotional, and intellectual, play a crucial role in strengthening relationships. Bryan candidly discusses the challenges he faced in his own marriage, from dealing with a lack of sexual intimacy to navigating the roommate syndrome, where partners drift
Handling the Expectations
In this episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve into the complex world of expectations and how they shape our reactions and relationships. Host Bryan Goodwin shares personal insights from his recent experiences with unrealized expectations, particularly in the context of a social media workshop that didn't meet his expectations. He discusses the common pitfalls of unvoiced expectations and covert contracts, especially in personal relationships, and how they can lead to frustration and resentment.B
Taking the Lead in Your Relationship
In this episode of The Relaxed Male, we have a special guest, Todd, who is one of my clients. Todd is a father, husband, and coworker who has faced relationship challenges that many men encounter, whether at home or work. This episode provides a unique opportunity to experience firsthand how coaching with me can transform relationships from feeling like roommates to ones you can truly enjoy.We delve into Todd's journey, discussing the struggles he faced in his marriage, particularly financial di
Question of the Month: Progressing beyond the Divorce
In this episode of The Relaxed Male, we dive into the topic of getting unstuck and moving forward in life, especially after significant life changes like a divorce. Host Bryan Goodwin, a certified coach, addresses the common feelings of stagnation and fear that can keep us from pursuing new adventures and living life on our own terms. We explore the importance of introspection and identifying the thoughts that hold us back, and Bryan provides actionable steps to overcome these barriers.We also t
Your Limitations Aren't Your Badge of Honor
In this episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve into the intriguing topic of how we often use our limitations as badges of honor. Host Bryan Goodwin explores why society tends to celebrate limitations and how this mindset can actually reinforce these constraints rather than liberate us from them. Brian discusses the phenomenon of labeling oneself with terms like ADHD, neurodivergent, or introvert, and how these labels can become self-fulfilling prophecies that hinder personal growth.Bryan emphasiz
Stop Waiting Around and Just Do It
In this week's episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve into the common struggles men face when trying to improve their relationships, particularly with their wives. Host Bryan Goodwin, a certified coach, explores the barriers that hold men back from living the fulfilling life they desire. He discusses the motivational triad that keeps us in our comfort zones, the fear of failure, rejection, and even success, and how these fears prevent us from taking necessary actions.Bryan shares his personal exp
How do you maintain individual identities in a relationship?
In this episode of The Relaxed Male, host Brian Goodwin delves into the complexities of maintaining individual identities within a marriage. Using the biblical reference of two becoming one, Brian explores how couples can balance unity with independence. He discusses the common pitfall of losing oneself in a relationship by trying to appease a partner, leading to codependency. Brian emphasizes the importance of being true to oneself and the detrimental effects of relying on a partner for affirma
Question of the Month: When You Really Screw Up
In this week's episode of The Relaxed Male, we're doing something a bit different by diving into an email from a listener. I, Brian Goodwin, your host, start with an apology for not responding to emails due to a technical oversight. I acknowledge the missed opportunities to connect with listeners and answer their questions. Moving forward, I commit to addressing one listener question per month on the show.We also discuss the renewed interest in the Brotherhood of Men group coaching package. Desp
You Can Have Control of Your Relationship Problems
In this episode of Relaxed Male, your host Bryan Goodwin dives deep into the intricacies of personal responsibility and self-awareness in relationships. Bryan discusses how men often become their own worst enemies by repeating the same actions and expecting different results. He emphasizes the importance of taking control of one's thoughts and actions to improve personal circumstances and relationships.Bryan shares his personal journey of overcoming frustration and blame, highlighting how men te
The Indulgent Emotion Of Feeling Stuck
In this episode of The Relaxed Male, host Bryan Goodwin delves into the common feeling of being stuck in life and how to overcome it. Bryan discusses the emotional and psychological aspects of feeling stuck, often referred to as mental spin or confusion, and explains how these feelings are rooted in fear and uncertainty. He shares personal experiences of feeling stuck in his own business endeavors and emphasizes the importance of understanding these emotions to move forward.Bryan outlines the co
Reviewing Your Year To Have Better Goals
Welcome to the first episode of 2025 on The Relaxed Male! As we step into the new year, it's crucial to reflect on the past year and learn from our experiences. In this episode, I, your host Brian Goodwin, delve into the importance of reviewing the past year to fuel your progress in the new one. We discuss how acknowledging your achievements and setbacks can empower you to move closer to your goals.Reflecting on my own journey with Relaxed Male, I share the ups and downs of 2024, including the c
Allowing Grace For The New Year
In this episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve into the concept of grace and how it can transform your life in the coming year. As the holiday season wraps up, many of us reflect on family gatherings and the challenges they bring. Host Bryan Goodwin encourages listeners to consider a different approach for 2025 by allowing grace to flow into their lives. Grace, defined as unearned forgiveness, is explored as a powerful tool for improving mental health and personal freedom.Bryan discusses the impo
4 Pillars to Transform and Reset Your Life in the New Year
As the holiday season approaches, it's the perfect time to reflect on the past year and prepare for the new one. In this episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve into the importance of reviewing our lives and setting goals for 2025. Host Bryan Goodwin, a certified coach, guides us through the process of self-examination and goal setting, emphasizing the significance of the four pillars of a relaxed male: mind, body, soul, and community.Bryan shares his personal journey with Relaxed Male, discussing
Taking your wife off the pedestal allows her to love you more.
The podcast focuses on the concept of taking one's wife off a metaphorical pedestal in a relationship. The host, Bryan, discusses how men often idealize their wives, creating an unrealistic and ultimately harmful dynamic in their marriages.Bryan explains that when men place their wives on a pedestal, they create an impossible standard of perfection. This idealization actually prevents genuine connection and love. By elevating their wives to an unreachable status, men inadvertently create distanc
Healing Relationships and Redefining Masculinity with Dawn Wiggins
This week on The Relaxed Male, we have a special guest, Dawn Wiggins, host of the podcast Dear Divorce Diaries. We dive deep into the world of marriage counseling and explore what couples can expect from therapy. Dawn shares insights on how to navigate the painful journey of divorce and offers strategies to prevent it by fostering healthier relationships.We discuss the concept of conflict avoidance, a common issue many men face, and how it impacts relationships. Dawn explains the importance of e
What in the World is Physical Intimacy?
In this final episode of our series on intimacy, we delve into the realm of physical intimacy. Over the past ten weeks, we've explored various forms of intimacy, including emotional, intellectual, spiritual, experiential, social, creative, conflict, aesthetic, and work. Today, we focus on the nuances of physical intimacy, a topic that often garners significant attention and curiosity.Physical intimacy is more than just the act of sex; it encompasses a range of interactions, from holding hands to
What in the World is Work Intimacy?
What is Work initiative?In this week's episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve into the concept of work intimacy, a lesser-known but vital form of intimacy that influences our relationships both at home and in the workplace. Host Brian Goodwin explores how work intimacy fits into the broader spectrum of intimacy types, including emotional, intellectual, and experiential intimacy. He discusses the importance of effective communication and collaboration with our partners and colleagues, emphasizing
What in The World is Aesthetic Intimacy?
In this episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve into the concept of aesthetic intimacy, exploring how aesthetics and intimacy intertwine in our lives. As part of a series on different types of intimacy, We discuss the importance of sharing beautiful experiences with loved ones, particularly spouses, to strengthen relationships. Aesthetic intimacy is about appreciating the beauty around us, whether it's a sunset, a piece of art, or a simple walk with a partner, and how these shared moments can enha
What In The World Is Conflict Intimacy?
In this week's episode, we delve into the concept of conflict intimacy, a crucial yet often overlooked aspect of relationships. Drawing inspiration from an article on Choose Therapy, we explore the ten different types of intimacy, focusing particularly on conflict intimacy and its significance in maintaining a healthy relationship.Conflict intimacy, as discussed, is the ability to engage in and resolve conflicts constructively. It is essential for preventing relationships from becoming stagnant
What In The World is Creative Intimacy?
We are exploring the world of Creative Intimacy todayIn this episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve into the concept of creative intimacy, one of the ten types of intimacy outlined by Choose Therapy. As we explore whether creative intimacy is a legitimate form of intimacy, I share my personal insights and invite listeners to form their own opinions.Creative intimacy involves the ability to collaborate with your partner on creative projects, such as making music, writing, or crafting. It requires
What in the world is Social Intimacy?
Host BrYan Goodwin, a certified coach, explores the ten different types of intimacy, focusing this week on social intimacy. He explains how social intimacy is essentially the connections we form with others, whether they are long-term relationships or brief interactions with acquaintances like a barista. Brian emphasizes the importance of maintaining these connections as we age, noting that societal changes and personal anxieties often hinder our ability to nurture friendships.BrYan discusses th
What in the world is Experiential Intimacy?
In this episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve into the concept of experiential intimacy, a crucial yet often overlooked aspect of relationships. Experiential intimacy involves sharing and bonding over life experiences with your partner, which can significantly strengthen your relationship. We explore why these shared experiences are vital and how they act as the cement that holds relationships together.Drawing inspiration from a Choose Therapy post on the ten types of intimacy, we focus on exper
What in the world is Spiritual Intimacy?
In this week's episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve into the concept of spiritual intimacy, continuing our exploration of the ten different types of intimacy as outlined by Choose Therapy. Having previously discussed emotional and intellectual intimacy, we now turn our attention to understanding each other's spiritual journeys. This episode challenges the notion of being spiritual without being religious and explores how spiritual beliefs can impact relationships.Host Bryan Goodwin shares his p
What in the world is Intellectual Intimacy?
In this episode of The Relaxed Male, host Bryan Goodwin delves into the concept of intellectual intimacy, exploring its significance in relationships. Building on last week's discussion on emotional intimacy, Bryan questions whether intellectual intimacy is a genuine form of connection or simply a modern construct. He shares insights from various sources, including a book on the pillars of marriage and a website listing ten types of intimacy, to understand this concept better.Bryan explains that
What in The World is Emotional Intimacy?
In this week's episode of The Relaxed Male, host Bryan Goodwin delves into the complex world of emotional intimacy. Bryan, a certified men's coach, shares his journey of understanding intimacy better to help men improve their relationships. He introduces the concept of emotional intimacy, distinguishing it from physical intimacy, and explains its importance in a healthy marriage. Bryan discusses the various types of intimacy, including intellectual, spiritual, experiential, social, creative, con
How Do You Handle Conflicts In a Relationship?
In this episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve deep into the complexities of conflict, particularly in relationships, where disagreements often escalate into more significant issues. I emphasize the importance of addressing these conflicts rather than avoiding them, as avoiding uncomfortable discussions can lead to resentment and unresolved feelings. I explain that conflict itself is not inherently negative but rather an opportunity for growth and understanding if handled correctly.As a certified
Can You Actually Rekindle a Marriage?
In episode 240 we dive deep into the common issue of 'roommate syndrome' in marriages. Bryan addresses the fading spark that many couples experience after years of being together. He explores whether it's possible to rekindle a marriage and offers practical steps to reignite the passion.Bryan discusses the importance of honesty—not just factual, but emotional honesty—and how to communicate effectively without overwhelming your partner. He emphasizes the need for thoughtful gestures, such as writ
9 Different Marriage and Relationship Pitfalls You Want to Avoid.
Marriage is an adventure. If you don’t look at it as such then you run the risk of falling into a deep pit much like I did with Pitfall Harry. Marriage is not easy and in the early days can be wrought with lots of emotions and struggles. This is why so many marriages fail before reaching the 10-year mark. You first struggle with the idiosyncracies of the girl you dated. You noticed odd things you at first thought were cute habits of her being weird but now you are questioning if you can put with
When someone lets you down
Many times we will inadvertantly elevate someone to a higher level of status than we wanted to. I had something happen here recently that caused me to realize that I had actually elevated a man to an unheard of level of integrity. Then when he showed me that he didn’t believe all that he stated. To say the least, I had thoughts that I was betrayed, and he had sold out to the Woke mind virus. I wanted to set my heels and almost punish him for violating, my standards, by keeping the proof tha
Mastering the 'Do Over'
When we have topics of discussion with other people there are times that we may mess up and we start to say words that we don't mean and try to intentionally inflict pain upon the other person. We just are caught up in our emotions and trying to inflict pain on each other. When we are actively trying to destroy the trust and connection we have, the hope of having a better connection is gone. We fall into victim mindsets and fight because we see the conflict at hand being a matter of life or deat
My Falling into the Victim Mindset
Bryan recounts how he had been neglecting to mow his lawn in his small town. He previously had someone mowing it for him, but that arrangement fell through. The city eventually sent a notice about his overgrown lawn, and his wife was told it would cost $400 to have the city mow it. Bryan initially reacted with anger and fell into a victim mindset.As he reflects on the situation, Bryan realizes he is making excuses and playing the victim. He acknowledges that he hadn't been trying hard to find a
Have Better Deeper Communications With Your Wife
Why even have a stronger connection?Better conflict resolution - You will have conflicts and those conflicts can be making or breaking points for your relationship.More trust - When you both know you will not take everything said personally then the trust starts to form.More intimacy -Us guys do like our sexy timeBetter connectionsIt is not personal, it is just someone sharing what they are thinking with the other person. It isn't real it is just a thought. Thoughts aren't as scary as you would
Analyzing Peter Keating's Downfall and His Cost of Being a 'Nice Guy'
In this episode of The Relaxed Male, host and certified men's coach Brian Goodwin delves into the character of Peter Keating from Ayn Rand's novel, The Fountainhead. Peter Keating epitomizes the 'nice guy' who struggles with self-identity and decision-making, always seeking approval from others rather than living life on his own terms. Brian discusses how Keating's actions and associations lead to his downfall, contrasting him with the novel's protagonist, Howard Roark, who remains steadfast in
When Does A Relationship End?
Clues that your relationship is failingDreading going homeFighting over little stuffEntertaining the idea of divorceYou may be intentionally spending time apart.Little to no sexYou are blaming the other person for your unhappinessLack of TImeMarried for the wrong reasonsMaterial ItemsLooking to the pastEnding The RelationshipWhy you might end the relationshipWhen you have one or more of the three A’sThese are the key points that trust falls apart so much that it can destroy any chance of reconci
Processing Your Emotions For a Better Life
We go through emotions hourly. Those emotions correlate with the different thoughts that we have. It is said that we have around 60,000 thoughts a day. That means that we have around 60,000 emotions a day. Now incorporate the 50-50 principle and you have half of your thoughts are gonna be good thoughts because they generate good emotions and the other half are gonna be bad thoughts that generate bad emotions.Many many times we struggle with negative emotions. We avoid those negative emotions. We
Improving Yourself to Strengthen Your Relationships
If you want to have a better relationship you have to improve yourself. How are you going to help inspire those around you to be better people if you aren’t willing to improve yourself? We all have the ability to influence those who are around us. Jim Rohn said it best. You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with. So it stands to reason that those people will also have you as part of their average.When it comes to our relationships, being able to improve ourselves is cruc
The Path of Fulfillment Is Acknowledging Emotional Pain
We all experience pain at one time or another. Pain can be a physical sensation from a Papercut or it could be from an emotion. The pain that I am talking about today is emotional pain. The feeling that we get from the emotions that we don’t like. Emotions, for instance, powerlessness, frustration, fear, uncertainty, insecurity, humiliation, lost, are often viewed as painful and are often avoided.These emotions and more similar to them are unpleasant to experience. Often when we feel these emoti
The Hardest Question to Ask is Centered Around Sex
Any question leading to sex.Why We struggle with talking about sexIt requires you to be vulnerableWe take complaints personallyWe have biasesIsn't sex supposed to just happen and always be good?Or you can't have sex like that!Pushback is a threat to our beliefsWe make sex mean somethingWhy are these most intimate topics so difficult for us to talk about? Especially, when it is with the one person we are supposed to be able to openly and freely talk to.What is holding us back from asking about se
How We Break The Connection With Our Wife
So we have noticed that the lack of intentionality with our significant other has to change. To be able to change you have to know how you arrived in the circumstance you are in now. That is what we are going to be talking about this week. What actions did we take to break our connection?***Warning***Don't fall into the victim mindset here. You may want to say,"Well, she doesn't try either.""She started it""She is just cold""She never liked the marriage to start"or any other excuses. even if she
Building A Better Intentional Connection With Your Wife
After 10 to 20 years of marriage, you may notice that the roommate syndrome has crept in and has set up Shop right in your bedroom. You may be noticing that there are a lot of things that are just kind of normal. Maybe you think that’s how things just are. However, this stuff can change. The connection that you are used to hasn't gone it’s just not being used. Your emotional connections are a lot like a muscle and you have to exercise it to keep it strong.When we have that strong connection in o
3 Instances of You Get What You Give
You may have heard me talk about how our minds are like computers. You get out what you put in. There are many instances of this from getting respect you have to first give respect. If you want peace in your life you have to first give peace. Our Bodies are also like that Are you in shape or are you an example of soft living? Do you eat nothing but vegetables or are you an omnivour? Do you exercise? Do you lift heavy objects and throw them around your yard? What you are doing and how you feel ha
The Power of Living Life Intentionally
With much of life, we can either float down the river of life or we can steer our life to where we want to go. The difference is that when we use intention we get closer to where we want to go sooner than if we just drift.Lack of intention is where you hope you arrive at your desired destination. You are just going through life and often unintentional people come across as if they are asleep and don't put much thought into why they are doing what they are doing. They often will find these people
Where Did The Spark Go?
In relationships, we often will slide into a form of comfort routine that is called the Roommate Syndrome The Roommate Syndrome Where sparks go to smolder. Why does this happen? past disagreements It is easier Rejection free How to rekindle the spark Know what the roommate syndrome is about. Start with the end in mind Much like the word rekindle you have to use kindling Kindling is a small flammable material that you can use to grow an ember into a bonfire. It starts wi
The Art of Curiosity for Better Relationships
What does the world look like when you are curious Why it is good to get curious You see more out there You see what is possible Better at problem-solving You are more relatable More creative More Fulfilment Strengthens relationships Applying those to your relationships You understand your spouse or friend more You learn and discover more Curiosity helps you to connect even more it deepens the intimacy with your spouse Want to learn how to have more cu
Tips for Overcoming Relationship Ruts
After many years couples often find themselves in a strange predicament. The Sex and closeness fall off and people just sort of exist in the same house. There are lots of thoughts and interpretations of this. The decrease in intimacy has been a problem in marriage since marriages were implemented. Many today believe that the reason for the decrease in intimacy is the institution of marriage. That the very act of committing yourself to another person is why the fire dies down. It can be (See Room
Why You Need Relationships in Your Life
Men struggle with strong meaningful connections. Many even struggle with just having a relationship. So many men today don't have close relationships or their relationships are just surface-level connections that don't fulfill the purpose of a relationship. We men need relationships and yet we forsake our own needs for a plethora of reasons. So why do we need to have good strong relationships? Why can't we just hermitize ourselves and just be done with it? Benefits of a good relationship Why are
Your Participation Trophies In Life
Why do we get participation trophies? Easy bump of Satisfaction Empty victory How are you giving yourself participation trophies? Staying busy for the sake of busy or are you actually taking steps to go forward? Finding other things to do than what needs to be done. Buffering Example watching porn is you taking the participation prixe instead of actually building the connection withyour wife so that you have that much wanted intamacy. How are you taking the participation trophies of life? How ar
Avoiding Pain Isn't Going to Bring You Pleasure
Why do we appear to turn to pain Why do we put ourselves through these ordeals? We overeat Face hangovers Withdrawals We would rather face pain than Find satisfaction Why do we want more pain in our lives? Pain is a better motivator than pleasure. It is too scary to avoid the pain scarcity in our lives Not being intentional Coaching Offer - https://www.relaxedmale.com/coachingoffer Summary In this episode of The Relaxed Male, the host delves into the intriguing topic of pain and its role as
A Message for the Young Men
Never stop learning Read listen to podcasts Try new things Follow your curiosity Get out and enjoy the fresh air Go on a quest to find your purpose Do something scary Find a group of noble men to hang out with Porn is not your friend Dating When it comes to dating know what type of girl you want in your life. Yeah, there are the physical attributes but what character traits do you want in your wife? Date with the purpose of marriage Don't rush take a year to get to know her and then a year for t
A Message For The Young women
This is a special Message for girls who are 12 and up You have the power You have always had power in a relationship you have a purpose You just have to find it. Dont do what society says Society wants to tell you that a powerful woman sleeps with many men No, you have more power than that. Yes you can manipulate men with your breasts and what is between your legs but that is cheating yourself You are not held back by some all-scary patriarchy. First look at what a patriarch is, It is the olde
The Rules of Engagement for Effective Communication
When it comes to talking to each other we often get so much wrong. It isn't because we don't care or don't want to be heard but we simply don't know how to communicate effectively. Our ability to open good solid channels of communication lags behind our ability to talk. The hang-up is the habits we have created when we were growing up. Our thoughts of what the other person is saying. We believe that emotions happen to us and so when someone says something that isn't nice and doesn't feel good, w
The Only Real Disability is a Bad Attitude
I can't because of my Flaws, limitations, confines, distortions, scars, imperfections, or irregularities So many in society want to help you be OK with your flaw by helping you fight for that flaw. We turn to being a victim of our flaws instead of bettering ourselves because of it. Yet there are a few good powerful questions you could ask yourself. What does this make possible? What can I learn from this limitation? Common Disabilities ADHD - Seen as you not being able to concentrate Introver
The Trouble With Interpreting Other People's Emotions
Many times we experience the circumstances that are other people's emotions. We people have emotional breakdowns at times. We often get ourselves into trouble for things we have no control over or any effect on if we try to change it. We often will get ourselves into more trouble if we try to change the other person's emotions. What is an emotion? Many people want us to use their manual on how to behave around them, and that works at times but people don't like to be manipulated all the time.
Dad's Role in Having Mentally Healthy Kids
The Correlation of the withdrawal of dads and The Lack of masculinity In the US, divorce rates more than doubled from 2.2 per 1,000 in 1960 to over 5 per 1,000 in the 1980s. Marriages are decreasing Lack of dads and the increase of anxiety-ridden children Great Society - 1964 The government started taking the place of Fathers in the household and the marriage rates started to decrease in the 80's around 20 years for the new generation to start having kids. Dad's the Disciplinar
What I learned From Going On a 7-Day Fast
I just got off of a 7 day fast of no food or sugar. All I allowed myself was Water, Coffee, and salt. And today I wanted to share what I learned from that experience Why? What many people think fasting is What I experienced My reasons for trying a fast is I wanted to challenge myself. no diet reason No protest reason. no religious reason. Just wanted to see what it was like to fast for 7 days. I wanted to see what my thoughts when in that type of hardship was. I didn't focus on food but I notice
Let Go of the Past to Move Forward, Don't Buffer Your Life Away
What is buffering? The avoidance of thoughts and emotions So we have a reason to not try Why do we buffer? So we do not have to face the uncomfortable thoughts and emotions we have Our mind's way of helping us stay small and not be noticed We like to look to the past for reasons to not go forward. We let the past hold us back from the success we could have. Ways we buffer Phrases I have never done this before That is how everyone else has done it before I have seen this before The Old days
Stepping Into Your Best New Year
New year has arrived how are you going to have the best year in your life? Plan and pursue Why having plans is needed - https://www.relaxedmale.com/why-you-want-to-plan-your-year/ Build your 4 pillars Man's Mind Man's Body Man's Soul Man's Community Get a coach What I am doing this year Fasting 4 times Getting 10 clients Getting a coach End of the Year Information In this episode of The Relaxed Male podcast, the host begins by welcoming listeners and discussing the importance
How are you going to invest in yourself?
In this episode of the Relaxed Male podcast, the main speaker discusses the importance of investing in oneself and the different aspects of life that are worth investing in. They highlight the benefits of learning new skills and investing time and money in personal development. The speaker emphasizes the value of maintaining physical health and pursuing passions wholeheartedly. They also emphasize the importance of investing in relationships and building a strong support network. Financial inves
Setting Boundaries With The Family This Season
In this episode of the podcast, we delve into the topic of setting boundaries during the holiday season when families come together. We recognize that the mixing of families can sometimes lead to problems due to a lack of understanding of boundaries. As the host, I introduce the purpose of the show, which is to help men remove the "nice guy" persona from their lives and live on their own terms. We discuss the importance of boundaries and how they can make our lives better. We acknowledge that ea
How I Left the Victim Behind
In this part of the conversation, I, Brian, the host of the show called Relaxed Male, discuss the concept of victimhood and how I personally left behind the victim mindset. As a certified men's coach, I aim to help men remove the "nice guy" persona from their lives and live on their own terms. In this episode, I focus on the negative impact of adopting a victim mentality and how it affected me. I explain that despite experiencing certain events in my early life, such as my parents' divorce and m
The Truth On How to Avoid Becoming Overwhelmed
In this episode of The Relaxed Male, I talk about the topic of overwhelm and how to control it. I introduce myself as a certified men's coach, grateful for the positive impact my show has had on men's lives thanks to the support of listeners. I explain that overwhelm occurs when we take on too much and feel uncertain about our next steps. I emphasize that overwhelm is not solely caused by external circumstances, but also by our own beliefs about needing to do more. I discuss the idea that overwh
Getting Beyond the "I Don't Want To" Barrier and Start Living
In episode, we delve into the common challenge of setting new year's resolutions and subsequently abandoning them shortly after. This often stems from the obstacle of not having the desire to put in the necessary effort or make the required changes. I shed light on the resistance and obstacles we encounter in various aspects of our lives, ranging from mundane tasks to substantial responsibilities like paying taxes. I lay emphasis on the importance of making choices based on our genuine desires
Overcome the Past by Letting Go of Regret and Embracing Redemption
In this episode we explores the theme of redemption and the belief many men struggle with, feeling unworthy due to past mistakes. Bryan reflects on his own penchant for talking and lack of conversation opportunities while driving a truck. He highlights how many men limit themselves based on past actions and the false belief that they are undeserving of happiness and fulfillment. Bryan candidly discusses his personal journey of self-improvement, acknowledging his past shortcomings and struggles w
The One Thing That Will Allow You To Feel Fulfilled.
Accessing your why Your purpose What comes with purpose? Gratitude Growth mindset The desire to keep learning See How I can Help you Summary In this episode of The Relaxed Male, I, discuss the importance of making small changes in our lives to find fulfillment and energy. I believe that understanding the root causes of our suffering and learning to relax and enjoy life is essential. I have noticed that many men start new endeavors with enthusiasm but quickly lose motivation. Today, I want t
Are we Talking About Mental Health Too Much?
In this part of the conversation, we discuss the prevalence of discussions around mental health and the increase in depression and suicide rates. Despite the increased awareness, rates of depression and suicide have continued to rise, leading us to question why this might be the case. We speculate that the emphasis on mental health may have unintentionally contributed to the increase by bringing more attention to these issues. One possible reason for the increase in mental illness is the constan
Finding The Right High-Valued Woman
Why can't you find a high-valued woman? The answer is in you. Your results are from your thoughts. How much do you value yourself? Your personal values will reflect in the quality, if your view of yourself is low you are not going to have quality returns on your endeavors. No matter what they are. To receive value you have to produce value. All of life is a transition. The women will not be of the quality you desire because they are only attracted to men who are of high value. Ayn Rand expresses
How To Self-coach
In this episode, we celebrate the 200th episode of the podcast/show. Initially, the host had planned on offering live coaching sessions but unfortunately, no one signed up. This leads the host to reflect on what this lack of sign-ups means and how he can self-coach himself through this situation. He recognizes that berating himself or blaming others won't solve the problem and instead focuses on shifting his thoughts and approaching the situation with intentionality. Throughout the episode, th
Get out of Your Own Way
In this episode, I share my recent experience at a hippie event in Oklahoma, where I had the chance to meet interesting people and try out some healthy vegan options. I even participated in a unique activity called sound bathing, which turned out to be an eye-opening and fascinating experience. This event reminded me and my listeners about the importance of not allowing obstacles and excuses to stand in the way of our dreams and desires. Excuses can be the biggest barriers to our success, wheth
When Your Feelings Hurt
In this episode, we dive into the topic of emotions and how they can sometimes hurt. As a men's coach, my main goal is to assist men in navigating their struggles and finding ways to live life on their own terms. I highlight the significance of understanding our thoughts and how they impact our overall ability to fully experience life. Additionally, I mention that I am testing out a new audio setup and extend an invitation to listeners to join me for a live coaching session to celebrate the 200t
The Art Of No Offence
In this episode of The Relaxed Male, we explore the concept of being offended and discuss strategies to stop taking offense. As the host, my mission is to assist men in overcoming various challenges they face in their lives and finding happiness. I express my gratitude towards a listener who sent equipment to improve the sound quality of the podcast and mention an upcoming coaching session where individuals can share their issues. We begin by defining being offended as feeling hurt or insul
How To Forgive Yourself and Move On
Welcome to this episode of The Relaxed Male, where I, Brian, the host, will be diving into the topic of forgiveness. We all have those moments in life where we make terrible mistakes and feel a deep sense of regret. Today, I want to emphasize the importance of forgiving oneself for these screw-ups. As the host of The Relaxed Male, my mission is to help men remove the "nice guy" persona from their lives and live life on their own terms. As a certified men's coach, I work closely with men who are
Motivational Fuel, The 4 Strategies to Keep You Going
How to Find Motivation in completing your goals What's Holding Your Back? Fear Goals Not in Alignment Indulging in Confusion out of integrity Not challenging enough Strategies Monday Hour 1 The blank wall technique take small steps Track Your Progress Sign up for Try Coaching Event on October 16 If you don't want to be coached but want to see what it is about it will be streamed on Facebook . Take The Next Step
7 Ways to Break Free From Your Cycle Of Aimlessness
What is Aimlessness? Cause of aimlessness nonintentional thoughts You are just floating How to find your rudder and get direction Take time each day to make short goals. What is your objective? Express to yourself why this is important Time for you to get out and start exploring Try stuff Volunteer Work on your 4 pillars News 6 weeks till episode 200 Monday Hour One Coaching On Air relaxedmale.com/coachingtryouts @podbeancom In this episode, we delve into the topic of aimlessness and explore w
Why Men Benefit from Facing Pain
In this episode of The Relaxed Male, I discuss the topic of pain and why people have a tendency to avoid it. I share my own struggles with avoiding pain, using the example of neglecting my yard work due to excuses like podcasting and the hot weather. I question why people avoid pain when it is an inevitable part of life and emphasize that pain can be beneficial in motivating action and bringing about positive change. I use examples such as paying bills to avoid the pain of living without electri
Your Thoughts Create Your Results
On this week's episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve into the concept of thoughts creating results. As a certified men's coach, I help men who are facing various challenges in their lives, including divorce and daily struggles. We discuss how our thoughts shape our outcomes and why it is crucial to pay attention to them. Our thoughts play a significant role in either allowing us to succeed or holding us back from achieving our goals. Whether it's difficulties in getting clients or starting a bus
Are You After Success Or Happiness?
So what are you after in life? Are you out just to be happy? or are you after something more? Many men want to point to our founding documents and take from there that all we are supposed to be is happy. We are supposed to pursue happiness, yet are we able to actually catch our happiness, or would you settle for joy? How about something greater than happiness? Are you supposed to settle for just happiness? Let's look at this little thought experiment. What's the difference? Some people want to e
What is Your Code of Conduct
Roman code or Mos Maiorum Mos maiorum means the way of the elders 8 virtues Fideas - Be trust worthy The Latin word fides encompasses several English words, such as trust/trustworthiness, good faith/faithfulness, confidence, reliability, and credibility. It was an important concept in Roman law, as oral contracts were common. Pietas - Be respectful Pietas was the Roman attitude of dutiful respect towards the gods, homeland, parents, and family, which required the maintenance of relation
Do This Before You Make Any Huge Changes In Your Life
In this episode of the Relaxed Male podcast, we dive into the significance of altering our thoughts in order to improve our lives. Our thoughts shape our reality, emotions, and outcomes. It's common for people to believe that making a big change, like switching jobs or losing weight, will automatically bring them happiness. However, that's not the case. Our happiness and overall results are determined by our thoughts. As we begin our discussion, I want to take a moment to express our gratitude t
How To Properly Feed Your Soul
Getting the proper soul diet How are you helping yourself? Who are you talking to? How often are you talking to them? What are you doing for yourself? What are you doing for others? How do you start feeding your soul? Find what you are interested in. Look at different topics. Be hands-on. As long as you keep your interest occupied then good keep exploring that topic The moment you find your attention waning or you dread having to do something then you know that's not feeling your soul any
How to Gain Control Of Your Mind
How do you handle your mind? What is meant by gaining control of your mind? How is this skill even possible? Don't we have thoughts all the time? You can't control your emotions Why does your mind run like it does? Unintentional Thoughts Used to just go where it wants Learn mindfulness Meditation Journaling Pay attention to what you are thinking Breathe You are signaling to the thinking part of your mind that it needs to take control Slows you down Take slow deep breaths Write down
You Can Still Have Wonder About Life
Life can get monotonous We all let life slide by. We find ourselves floating down that river You don't have to let it Take over You have to notice when you are letting your life slide. Ask questions about that thought. Sadly we don't allow ourselves to get curious anymore. Importance of Being Curious It allows you to become childlike in wonder. You come to understand yourself better when you do allow yourself to become curious. You have a deeper connection when you stop assuming you know it
Using Positive Thoughts To Beat The Problem
In this episode, we explore the power of positive thoughts and how they can help us overcome challenges. We acknowledge that it's common to feel overwhelmed by problems, but stress the importance of maintaining a positive mindset. We share personal experiences, such as dealing with internet issues, to illustrate how positivity can make a difference. We also express gratitude for our audience and their role in our success. By focusing on the positives and adopting a mindset of abundance, we open
Harnessing the Power of Your Divorce to Become a Better Man
In this episode of "The Relaxed Male" podcast, I discuss how harnessing the power of a divorce can help men become better men. I begin by introducing the podcast as a place where men can remove the nice guy from their lives and find solutions to their suffering. I greet new listeners and acknowledge their role in the show's growth. I then talk about how people generally avoid discomfort and develop limiting thoughts about divorce. I argue that divorce was not celebrated in the past and still isn
Showing Up Fully For Those Around You
How do you want to show up? What is showing up? are you present at the moment or are you always lost in thought? How are you valuing those you are around? living with intention Who do you want to be in your marriage What type of husband do you want to be? are you listening to her or are you trying to fix it? Your Family Are you showing them the values you have are you letting them find their values in life too? are you the go-to person when there is a problem or are you showing them that
Looking At You Dad
In this episode of The Relaxed Male, the host delves deep into the importance of celebrating fathers on Father's Day. He explains that dads play a crucial role in society by being the pillars of households. Dads not only provide for the family financially but also emotionally. Masculinity is a much-debated topic. According to the host, dads show their sons how to be masculine by being leaders, and mentors, and guiding their sons to be confident. Dads are an essential factor in teaching sons the
How To Solve Your Problems
The Problem with our problems Our thoughts about the circumstance often create our problem The problem is that of comparison We want the problem to be a bad thing when it may actually be good. Many times we get mad at problems because we are thinking intentionally We want to think we just solved a problem and so we shouldn’t have any more problems. Our solution to a problem just makes more problems appear. This is how we become better. We level up our problems. Life is 50/50 Define the prob
Nurturing Self-Trust and Follow-Through
Now we all know about doing what you say to other people. This is part of keeping your word and that is important. If you break your word there is a lack of trust. That lack of trust has ramifications through more than what you want to think, and this is part of what is keeping you from going for the big prize in life. You don't even believe in yourself. People Don't Believe You It may be a given but I would still reiterate the point that if you can't keep your word others are not going to belie
Making Friends That Matter
People want to think that finding friends is difficult. and while it can be challenging to find quality friends the issue of finding friends isn't any harder than changing your thoughts. Your thoughts about meeting people will result in you either meeting good people or meeting bad people. or meeting no people. That Choice is yours. Be intentional As with anything in life if you aren't being intentional in what you do you will get results but those results aren't going to be to your liking.
Liberating Yourself from the Need for Validation
Something I hear over and over again is the man needs validation from his wife or the wife needs validation from her husband or friends or family or something to that effect. In this week's podcast episode, I am here to help you see that you are not a parking lot voucher and so you don't need to be validated. We also talk about the fact that I am out of the office and back in a truck and why that was a good thing. What is validation? Why do we seek it? How do we validate ourselves? Don't forget
Letting Others Fix Their Own Problems
What happens when you try to fix other people's problems? The answer is a lot of unintended consequences. Many guys who are going through their divorce see that they are struggling to find their place in the current scenario and with men often having some aspect of a nice guy they try to rush to a person's aid. Why can't you fix a problem if you can? Trying to fix a problem isn't going to help anybody but yourself feel good about yourself. It doesn't help the other person with their problem it m
Are You Numbing Yourself?
What is holding you back? The root cause is fear. Yet as I have talked before we run from fear. We avoid feeling fear in almost every aspect of life. This is where courage in the face of fear is most needed. Yet we hide from that fear by masking the fear. We often do many different activities to hide from the fact that we are feeling fear. When you are hiding from fear or any other emotion what you are really doing is not addressing the problem at hand. that problem is a thought that you are hav
The Difference Between a Boy and a Man
Now You hear me talk about Grown men and grown boys. I have juxtaposed the two against each other a few times. Yet I want to do it on the podcast because sometimes people just don't like to read. Yet there is a huge reason that it is important to differentiate these two. That reason is that one is the source of weakness and victim mindset while the other isn't. Boys are Consumers In active A victim Pass the blame Men are action takers Producers Take responsibility Leaders
Living Your Life in Fear
What does it look like when you are living your life in fear? When you have a constant state of anxiety and fear how does one man cope? In fact, how does anyone cope? That is a huge and very important question to ask I come across so many men who are living in one form of fear or another. The Gentleman who is talking in this post shows all the detail of why living in fear causes you so many different forms of suffering and anguish. Anyone else in here dealing with a soon to be ex that still wan
Why Are You So Busy?
To be busy is almost a badge of pride for most men. Yet is it really? Is it better to be busy or is there something else you want to focus on? If it is something else then why do we focus on being busy? Why is busy what we want to do and not the other thing? The fallacy of busy Being busy is not the goal we want. Whether we are running our own business or helping another person achieve their goals by being an employee. Being busy is wasting energy and time. I came across a thought about how busy
Why are you avoiding happiness?
Note I talk about this being episode 171 and it is episode 172 Many times we claim that happiness is our goal. We want to be happy. We just want to be happy. Yet when it is time to take steps to be happy what is holding you back? Why do we avoid happiness? Because we are designed to look out for the bad. We know we have a better chance of staying alive if we worry about the tiger that might be in the rosebushes The Issue is that today there are not that many tigers roaming around our municipalit
The Truth of Being Judgmental
So, how many times have you had someone yell at you about bout not judging them? What do they mean by the whole don't judge me? How do you not be judgmental? You cant What is actually happening people don't want to be told they are out of step. They don't want to be told they are wrong. It is a double standard It is a lot like how women want to dress nicely to attract the guys they find attractive but get mad when the normal guy finds them attractive.
How Do You Forgive?
We as humans have emotional responses about many many things. Some people have more responses than others. Yet one of the big choices a person is able to make is not to the benefit of someone else but to themselves. Yet for some reason many people don't want to better themselves. I have started to understand that many people often seek out suffering and pain in their lives. This sounds so odd to me because so many people actually complain that they just want to be happy. Yet when happiness comes
How To Shift Your Thoughts
Thoughts are what make your world yours. We love to have thoughts and share thoughts about what our thoughts are thought to mean. Our thoughts are fascinating when you step back and look at them. Especially when you can step back and see when a person is lost in their thought loops. A thought is nothing more than what we think. Was that the audience saying " Duh!"? YOu would think that it is a universal truth. Yet when you look at all the Karens in the world getting upset at everyone else for no
Beating Frustration - When You Have Had Enough
What happens when the pressure of life gets too much? How do so many men act like life doesn't bother them while you are sweating bullets? Frustration is a huge emotion when you are in a stressful situation. Examine why you are having all this pressure You are running to get the kids for your 4 hours of visitation. Yet you have a boss who is holding your job over your head. Stating that if you aren't at work when he says you will have plenty of time to play daddy. Then you have all the different
Divorced at Home With Craig
This week we have a long episode. Yet it is a great episode. I have a friend of mine who has gone through a divorce and we talk about how a divorce changes a man and how that can be for the better or the worse. This week we have Craig Ignatowitz from the podcast At Home with Craig, He has gone through 3 different divorces and so if anyone has some insight as to how divorce can affect a man it is this fine gentleman. Home Page - Athomewithcraig Podcast Twitter - Igster101
How do you take action?
One of the main traits that define a man is his ability to take action. Stop playing the ignorant game You do know you just don't want to have to say it out loud. I don't know is an indulgent action Make a decision One of the hardest parts boys have is when they are faced with a choice. How do they decide? How can you decide? Why are decisions so hard to make? What is a decision? It is the cutting away of a part of a choice. You are actually killing an option. If you are wanting to weigh out
Overcoming Fear
Let's go back to the first night your wife told you she wants a divorce. How did you act or what did you do? You had thoughts racing through your head like, She's going to take the house. I am going to have to live in an apartment again. She is going to take the kids away from me. Followed by tons of questions that get answered with scary thoughts. That first night and the rest of the week were pure hell. You were wondering where she was going each night while you stayed home with your mind cran
When Relationships Run Their Course
Relationships like many things in life aren't always permanent. There are some relationships that will last only for the time of your airline's flight. While some may last for decades. Now, this needs to be said, If you are in a place where you are in danger then yeah time to leave. Do not pass go and forget about the $200. If you are in an abusive relationship then get out and find safety first. Then you can work on your thoughts. Yes, men can be in abusive relationships too. Those types of rel
Off Balance? Get Focused
How many times have you found yourself off balance? Especially when you are going through something as unpredictable as a divorce. It is easy to be knocked off balance when you don't have your focus What happens when you are off balance? Small things set you off Your attention is easily drawn away from the important objective. You will not get anything accomplished easily You will find yourself in scarcity mindset more You will have more drama in your life Exercise To Try Close your eyes and s
Why Divorces Happens
Now I have talked about this a bit in Episode 82 The 3 A's There are 3 reasons for divorce and those are the 3 A's. These A's are trust destroyers. You can overcome these but it takes time and a lot of it. When I say, "time" I don't mean days or months I mean a minimum of 3 years but it can take as long as the offended party needs to trust in the offender again. Now those three A's are... Abuse Addiction Adultery You may hear something like, we just fell out of love. Ok but that isn't a reason
Your Best Year Yet!
Tools Needed Notebook Pen/s Determination Plan Now I have been talking about Break the plan down into sizable chunks Use the Smart goal technique Specific - Measurable - Attainable - Relevant - Timely - This technique is just the start. It is nothing more than a starting place. This helps you get your thoughts in order and determine how you will proceed. Because when you take the SMART technique and add it to something like the 12-week year, you start making massive strides. this is because
What Does Your Future Hold?
This is the end of the year. Therefore it stands to reason that we are looking toward the future. Why you don't look to the future? I don't know how. What if I fail? I don't have the money I don't know what I want I have never done X. Are you looking to the future or are you just daydreaming? Many times we say we are looking at the future when in all reality we are daydreaming. The difference between planning and dreaming is the deadline. When are you going to achieve the goal? What is keeping y
The Need For Your Family
With it being the Christmas season it is easy to want to hide away from relatives who stick their noses in other people's business. It is easy to just not go anywhere and avoid people. It is easier to spend time in your own misery than to spread it around and let other people see. What Family Is Your first friends people you bond to Where you are loved Human What Family Is Not family isn't just blood relations perfect Out to hurt you Why is Family Needed? the traditions are stronger than you wan
Is It OK To Be Rich?
Is it OK to be rich? These questions will bring up so many thoughts about money. I don't care about money/Money isn't important Money Is the Root of All Evil Money makes you greedy Money Tears families apart Money is nothing but a score Money is a circumstance Money is like alcohol Money is a tool
You Are Worthy?
You are worthy Inferiority complexes Love Yourself Being the Bully to yourself Troubled by your past? Nobody really cares about your past. Building your Self-worth Kintsugi and Ikigai Find your purpose Feel like an imposter
How to Attract More Women
Ok, Guys this week we are talking about what men need to stop doing to attract more women. The Thanksgiving Story The biggest reason I did this show is that on Thanksgiving my mom got an unsolicited Dick pick from one of the guys she is talking to. how do I know? because I was looking at a picture my mom's suiter had sent earlier when he sent her an image of his morning wood. This is something that seems to be running rampant. Women are complaining and men are winding why they aren't getting lai
Taking the High Road In Divorce with Andy Heller
This week I have a special guest who has taken the time to find out how to get the best out of an awful situation. Andy Heller had the rug ripped out from under him after being married for 8 years and being the father of 2 kids. What did Andy do? Did he delve into shame and Scarcity? He may have tried but he didn't in the end. He actually started studying what was going on and taking notes. He also started going to a therapist and taking the advice they gave. From here, Andy started talking to o
Are You Thinking of Your Goals?
How closely have you followed your dreams? How often have you talked about something being nice or cool to have and leaving it at that? If you are like me then you probably do it fairly often. Then there are times that I will get very intentional about a specific idea and pursue it to fruition. The difference is striking. How do you follow your dreams? Have you ever made one of your dreams come true? If not why? If you ever wanted to see if there was magic, a higher being, or universal power, th
Can You Forgive?
It doesn't matter how you look at it, you have had the feeling that you have been wronged at least a few times in your life. It may be just a minor faux pas or something major where you have had a major grievance. We all have the opportunity to forgive at one point or another. The problem most people have is that they have the opportunity to forgive someone and they don't. These people often struggle with the anger and resentment that builds up within themselves. All because there was some occu
Rise of The Lonely Man
We are talking about the Lonely man this week. We look at, why are there so many lonely men in society. Boosts! Main topic Today I wanted to talk about a post that has been making its rounds on social media and other sites. This is why there are so many lonely men in society today. Is the lonely guy lonely because he is toxic, or is it be of other factors? It is from Psychology Today and it came out back in August. This article is called The Rise of the Lonely Single Man: Men need to address the
Use Stress To Your Advantage
Life is full of stress how you handle that stress can often determine what makes you or breaks you. Panic and stress Don’t use it as an excuse to not get your goal done Apply it as gas for your goal We panic and stress because we want to win Don’t hide/ resist it will tire you out
Why You Are Poor
You look around you see many people of different degrees of wealth. Some are rich, some are very rich and others are filthy, stinking rich. The same goes for the other direction. You have those that don't make as much as you. Some are poor. There are those who are dirt poor and there are those who are so poor they can't even pay attention. You fall somewhere in the middle of the two extremes. You aren't filthy stinking rich nor are you destitute. You often see people talking about the poor and
Your Motivational Triad
Boosts! Chad 8599 sats - I heard your Boostagram on PC 2.0 so I’m checking out your podcast. Main Show Why do you do what you do? Sounds like a weird question to ask yet we always ask that and there is a reason why we keep doing the same things over and over. Why do certain people keep falling into the same traps time and again? Why do men pick the same type of woman over and over again? Why do we struggle on improving ourselves? Why do we struggle on losing weight? Why do we struggle on improvi
You're Wrong, and That's OK
We often come across people who claim we are wrong, or that we have someone who is completely wrong and has no clue about the topic at hand. An instance where so many people who didn't know what they were talking about are often seen as blowhards or complete fools. Today it seems like everybody has to be right. Insistent on being right and even when you prove that they’re wrong. they find a reason to be right. I’m not pointing out one particular set of folks with this either. I find myself being
Are You Buffering?
There is a myriad of emotions that we men go through. in fact, we have all the same emotions that women have. Whaaaaa? Yeah, Men have the same emotional depth as women, Now we express those emotions differently and we may not use the same language for what we feel as our feminine counterparts but they are there. Many times we use emotions for the very same reason. This includes our avoidance of emotions through buffering. What is Buffering? Buffering is the act of doing other activities in order
An Argument For Discomfort
Many people hear discomfort and they shy away from it because the word brings up images of their skin being flayed off, or they have to lay on a bed of nails. You know, horrible things being done to them. Yeah, they are right none of that is very comfortable. In fact, all that sounds downright painful. Yet pain and discomfort actually are good things to have in your life? They help you gain the skill you need for the task at hand. Discomfort is needed in your life to teach you about resistance a
Don’t Make Decisions While Going Uphill
going up a hill is hard You lose momentum when making a decision you are under more emotional influence The hill is the toughest of the path You don't have enough data We are faced with decisions all the time. But when do you want to make those decisions? Many people often make their decisions at the wrong moment. What is going up the hill? Going up a hill is at a time of heightened emotional state. This is when you let your emotions make decisions, not your thinking brain. The uphill battle i
The Drawbacks of Self-Improvement
You draw attention to other's lack of action You lose friends who just want to hang Your mother will worry about you People will judge you People will actively hope for you to fail Other people will feel bad about themselves They will resent you Self-improvement is lonely All that sounds like a good reason not to better yourself, right? Wrong that is the very reason to better yourself. You have to look at their lack of action as a motivator to actually propel yourself to better heights. The ot
The Power of, What If?
Main Topic The magic question What if you could be successful? what if You could take that dream vacation? What if you did have that house on the hill? What if that girl did agree to go on a date? What if your wife did decide to stay What if you showed your wife the needed attention she wanted? Limiting What if Questions what if you got fired? What if your wife did leave? What if you failed in your task What if it doesn't work? Yeah it is visualization which has been discussed on a few episo
Do You Really Not Care?
Many times I hear the words I don’t care. This is in response to what others think to how they act in a group. Many guys will sluff off the phrase I really don't care or that's just how I am. Is this productive or is it a mean's for you to not have to try? What happens when you don't care? There are many effects of a man not caring about something. Isolated Aggravated Feel alone - because restless Why do you not care? There are many reasons that men say they don't care. From appearing to sound
Live From Mission Critical
This week I am talking to both Rich Chelson and Matt Glesspie of Operation: Tears of the 22 and how they got started. How they did it without knowing what they were getting into. How they did it scared. Now the sound quality isn't the same level that I am used to cranking out but that is part of the fun of trying new things out. So Listen as we talk about how they overcame some of the obstacles they faced as they built a 501(c)(3) from the ground up. If you want help finding your why on doing so
There is a Need For Leadership
August 4-7 Tears of the 22 Retreat Thanks Those who gave Sats. Main Topic Uvalde 400 officers standing around waiting for someone to give orders Sniper couldn’t get clearance Possible result of defunding the Police Police don't want to be put in jail Don't want the responsibility laid on their heads Reminds me of Atlas Shrugged Men need to take responsibility and action when needed Can't have men afraid of the consequences of their noble actions. Yes there are actions that are not noble but taki
Is religion important?
Thanks to Hastirongod29 6 sats Angeltovar22 1 sat eddieem Boost! 2 sats robertgomez 60 Sats Event! Operation Tears of the 22: Mission Critical Main Topic man has had religion their whole lives there are many different types of religion The key point is that all of them have a god. Abrahamic Religions all have god. And they break apart from there Judaism, Islam, Christianity Each of those breaks down into subgroups, And those subgroups into smaller subgroups There are modern religions that turn M
I am a Failure
Thanks to boosts stream pay's @user50456778804705802114 @mariost2104380 @user1418343976470596460 @user6465513779413332560 @robertgomez640 @user6895229526496442710@ user8725507786725826810 @moncadad96 @oscar1990diaz106 @user1996186395908832112 @eddiem I have screwed up. I have don't it over and over again. I wasn't the perfect brother. I wasn't the perfect Son. I have let down my family many times over. I found out why lying does you no good. I have broken hearts, and I have failed as a father
Altruism's Dangers
The Operation Tears of the 22 Mission Critical Retreat. Storytime - home town alma mater is giving away free school supplies and I raised the question of why this seems like it will end badly? I got a lot of parents from that area chimed in saying it was a good thing. I really don't think it is, for many different reasons. I have several thoughts as to why not having the parents provide the supplies Well this is when you really need to have that debate. Just leave it alone? why? Because it’s e
Live an Intentional Life
What is intention? So many times we are living our life because we see someone else doing something or we are told how we should live our lives and we blindly just do it. We don't think about does that fit what we want in life? You often see teenagers struggle with this. These Young people run from one fad to the next. This is why the current fad of gender studies is so damaging. Because they don't know if the permanent changes to their lives are what they really want. They think they do but the
Why is Divorce So Difficult?
Now, this may sound like an obvious bit of knowledge but I see many men ask why is divorce so hard? There are many reasons as to why it hurts so much, why you are having to suffer, and more thoughts like that. Yet we keep with the dirty pain and keep resisting the facts that are at hand. We want to control the circumstances in our life. Yet doing so only increases the suffering we experience. What is dirty pain? This is the pain we resist. It is pain that we believe is happening to us and is kee
Why Men Need Men in Their Lives
NEWS Operation Tears of the 22 is having its retreat for Veterans again this year. But instead of Byrds Adventure Center, They are having it at Adam Sandoval's Kriver Campgrounds. You can get your tickets for 4 days of fun and jeeping around. There are going to be bands in the evening and I will be there coaching everyone who wants it and some people who don't. So Sign up here! Main topic One of the biggest parts of having a fulfilling life is having that important network of masculine friends.
Viewing Your World Through a New Lens
How many times have you kept hitting the same wall over and over? How do you view events in your life? As we talked a couple of weeks ago about viewing your circumstances How do you act during a circumstance? Do you get riled up over some random dude cutting you off in traffic or do you just wave and carry on? Do you wonder why you are always finding the same women when you date? Maybe they are drama magnets or always having some type of emergency for you to come to the rescue? How about your ki
Are You Man Enough For These 3 Tests Women Run on Men?
Believe it or not, your woman wants to know if you are man enough. They need to be assured that you aren’t going to flake on them. That is what the 4 pillars of a relaxed male does, it helps men be there for those time their wives and girlfriends need them. He keeps himself up for these tests that will eventually happen. Now when I say tests I’m not saying these are tests that women even knowingly do. It’s not having your girlfriend's best friend try to seduce you just to see how loyal you are.
Getting Prepared
One of a man's responsibilities is to make sure his family is taken care of. It is something that we men often will take immense pride in. With that said there is one part of this responsibility that many of us men sadly drop the ball on. That is us being a good boy scout and being prepared for the unknown. Why prepare? Grocery stores only have about a 3 day's supply of food. We have seen supply chains disrupted many times in the last 2.5 years. There are still items that are disrupting the supp
For The Benefit Of The Kids
This episode is for both dads and moms because it is about our kids. Maybe not as much phone Let them struggle Failure is good for them Maybe get them out of the school system let loose of the reigns some Ask them questions without judgment Seek to understand before being understood https://apnews.com/article/entertainment-health-jill-biden-mental-1ebf72305a84aa70e14a8903ec90cad4?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=news_tab
VIewing Your Circumstance
Now through life, we all face circumstances in our life. Circumstances are not only the events we face, they are the fact of the events that we face. You see, when a circumstance happens around us, we have thoughts about that circumstance. Those thoughts could be good or they could be bad. It is all about how we think of that circumstance. In Episode 117 I talked about Circumstances and the fact that these events in our lives are not good nor are they bad until we apply thought to them. This is
Dreamers of the Day
Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds awake to find that it was vanity; But the dreamers of day are dangerous men. That they may act on their dreams with open eyes to make it possible T. E. Lawrence Do you dream during the day? Many of us men don't allow ourselves to dream. We feel that our world is what Our circumstances dictate. We as men often feel trapped, and we resign ourselves to this life. yet that we don't have to we can change everything about our world all we
Why All The Superhero Movies?
Pop culture has a way of telling people what they are missing. What the vibe of society is from decade to decade. And that is evident in today’s popularity of superhero movies. Television shows on popular streaming services have superhero television series. Superheroes are everywhere. Why well I think it shows The mindset and thoughts of society as a whole. In the past, You saw way back in the 20s there were songs like we’re in the money, and then in the 30s you saw songs like brother can you sp
The Sinkable Female-Led Relationships
Now there are many different types of relationships around. Many work and more don't. Wanted to examine one relationship "Style" that is being talked about and the Nice guy thinks he will like it, yet the woman will become miserable. That style is the Female Led Relationship Thanks, to the Woke wave of Feminism you are seeing women we are wanting to change the family dynamic. Why? well, they are entering into relationships with the mindset that men are the scourge of society and that the traditi
The River of Misery
What is the River Of Misery? This is a gap where on one side you are mentally and on the other side of the river is where you want to be. The River of Misery is the effort you make to get to the other side and have a new and better thought. What represents water in the middle is the struggle to get to the other side. There is all the cognitive dissonance, the effort to power over to a new thought, The tripping and failings that happen when you fall back into old ways of thinking. Bridge Thoughts
How to Remove Fear From Your Life
Fear is one of those emotions that cripple us from all sorts of opportunities. Fear keeps us playing small. We don't live up to our possibilities. We don't shine as bright as we could. all because we are afraid. Of what? That depends on the person. They may be afraid of what others will think. That people may see them as a fraud that they are. A person may be afraid to fail or afraid that they may succeed and then what happens? The opposite of fear is love Curiosity is the replacement of Fear Cu
The Slap Heard Around the World
Now with this being released each Thursday I am just now getting around to talking about the slap that everyone's talking about. There is a lot to break down in this major event. Will Smith slaps Chris Rock Now most people have seen this video but if not here is what I was able to find on Youtube https://youtu.be/myjEoDypUD8 The Slap Video Now First thing I noticed was WIll laughing after the GI Jane joke. but if you look at Jada's reaction she wasn't impressed. Second who slaps like that? Is
Your Rucking Life
As you may know, I did a thing back on the 22 of Feb and It helped me out in ways I didn't know. First I have sympathy for those with bad knees. Wow, my knees were not happy after walking 22 km with 22 lbs on my back. Yet as I was doing my three laps I was able to correlate some of life's events to a ruck march. We go unprepared Are we ever prepared for the first attempt? You can control the weight of your pack What you believe and the other thoughts you have can really start weighing you down.
The Model: Your Results
The Model Series The Model Circumstance Thought Feeling Action Results Your results This is the last line of your model. When done correctly you will have the results reflect back to your thought line. If you don't get it you have more than likely mixed up your models. Why is the results important? It shows you whats actually happening in your life It is proof that you are on the right tract when you are trying to take massive action With the right results you will be able to atain your goals
The Model: Action
The Model Series The Model Circumstance Thought Feeling Action - This episode Results Your action What do you want to do? Is the action serving you? How this line fits into the model This is what we do based on how we are feeling. Our actions lead to the results. You have to change how you think of the circumstance if you want to change your action. Take trying to lose weight. Circumstance - You are 50 pounds overweight Thought - You can't stand how you look in the mirror Emotion - disgust A
The Model: Feelings
The Ruck March report The Model Series The Model Circumstance Thought Feeling - This episode Action Results What are emotions? VIbrations Emotions are vibrations that start in your mind and are felt throughout your body Emotions are also associated with different neurotransmitters and hormones your body produces dopamine - pleasure, happy gamma-aminobutyric acid (GABA), - Calming serotonin - Joy and contentment Oxytocin - love Endorphins - relaxed Hormones we avoid norepinephrine - FIght or
The Model: Thoughts
Announcements The Model Series The Model Circumstance Feeling Action Results This is the biggest obstacle you will encounter Thoughts are the start of your model, not the circumstance This is where the pain and suffering you have in your life is from This is where the joy and sense of accomplishment comes from Thoughts create the emotions you feel
The Model:Your Circumstance
Announcements Ruck March - Operation Tears of the 22 Operation Tears of the 22 website Operation Tears of the 22 Facebook Other Episodes on this series The Model Thoughts Feelings Actions Results When we are talking about The Model we have 5 lines that we are working with. The first line is the Circumstance line. Many people want to say this is the source of your problems but this is not actually the truth. It is the facts of your model but it isn't the truth. What is a Circumstance? Any even
The Model for a Better Life
What is actually holding you back? This is a question I ask often and for good reason because so many people focus on the wrong culprit. They think it is the thing in their life that is creating their pain. The Wife is making them mad. The kids are disappointing you. The promotion to that new position is because the boss is a jerk. None of these are the real reason why you are unhappy, unfulfilled, Feel as if you are chained to your desk. The person holding you back is you and the Model can show
Men Who Overcame The Odds
Many of us think we have huge insurmountable obstacles in our life. But do we really? Are the obstacles that are keeping you away from your goals and dreams really in your way? Are your problems as bad as you say? This week I wanted to challenge you on your thinking. You are telling yourself a huge lie in that you can't do something because of whatever the circumstance is. HOW? Well, I want to show you some men who overcame the obstacles in their world and it was because of their thoughts. Not t
Ready Yourself for Success
Visualize How would you be when you are successful Dress for success What would you have? act the part Won't that make you a fake? according to who? Their reactions to your success is a reflection of their shortcomings This gets your mind wrapped around what it will be like if you are successful If you were to just become successful overnight you mentally wouldn't know how to handle the pressure and responsibility of that success. You would self-sabotage and wind back at your starting place
The Key to Happiness Is to Be Miserable?
Where you are at in your life? Are you struggling to find meaning or maybe no matter how hard you try you just aren't happy? This is a common problem for most men. They are sitting on the couch, their life is sort of Blah. Maybe you are wondering how in the heck you ended up in this predicament? You had so much fire when you were young and then life just took over. Now you are overweight. Watching a game on the huge screen television. You have the house, the cars, the kids, yet you aren't really
The Man's Uniform
The clothes make the man. Have you ever heard that phrase? Well, there are reasons that getting dressed is important for you and what you want to accomplish. Dressing up is one thing but how do you normally dress? That is the question. This doesn't mean you have to be at the pentacle of men's fashion. In fact, I question the fashion industry and how they are trying to femininize men. Men do have a way to dress and the uniform they choose to wear for their battle is important. There is a reason f
The Attitude You Are Showing
Do you have an attitude problem? Where are you now Not getting anywhere You are broke no connection in your marriage Feel alone Do you want to stay that way? The effects of your attitude Not having any friends Failed business Marriage is failing You can make a simple change Pay attention to your attitude My story Why change the attitude You will see people act differently around you. People will start looking at you as a leader, not as a hindrance What does a different attitude r
The Power of Men's Groups
There are many ways you can build your community. There is the church, schools, civic organizations, your place of employment, and your neighborhood. You can find men who you would like to aspire to be like just about anywhere. And right off the bat let’s point that out. These men will rub off on you. The phrase, “ Show me your friends and I’ll show you your future” fits. If you want to be successful in business you want successful men. If you want to get in shape, have men who take pride in the
Are Goals Important?
The start of the year is here. This is the time everybody talks about what their goals are, what they want to achieve, and how they plan on how they are achieving it. Why are goals important? Why do you want to even think of goals? IT seems that nobody actually completes their goals. Especially when it comes to New Years Resolutions People start with good intentions and then around March that fire and determination you had all the way back at January first is up and gone. Then before you know it
The Importance of Traditions
What are traditions? They are the ideas and values passed down from generation to generation. They are customs and beliefs that bind a culture together. The raising of a Christmas tree during Christmas. The celebration of a new year. Your birthday is special. You brush your teeth with your eyes closed. All are traditions and rituals we do. We have rituals for everything and every occurrence. We mark special days for remembrance. These may be days of triumphs, or they may be days of loss. There a
The Antiwork Movement
There are changes happening in our society, and there are two groups of people who are involved. There are the people who realize they can do better and do something about it and then there are the ones who want to sit around and complain about the quality of their life and have stuff handed to them. Because of this, you have two different factions forming. There is the great resignation and then there is the antiwork. Another way to look at this is the boys and the men. The Great Resignation Th
Stop Trying To Fix Everything
It doesn't have to be fixed As nice guys, we really hate having people not be at a certain level. If they are unhappy or upset for any reason, we feel we have to fix it. Even if people are having more fun and laughing beyond our comfort level, we have to find a way to fix the issue instead of just allowing people to be. Nice guys feel that they have to fix a problem out of the hopes that that person will start to like and appreciate us. When in all reality people do t want us to just fix it. In
Where Do You Want To Go
We find ourselves stuck in so many situations and those circumstances are things that are beyond our control this is true. Yet there are so many times that we believe that stuck in that situation and so we either do nothing about it or complain about our situation. That feeling of being stuck and not being able to change is a part of the self-programming that we do. We are just bad at sports or we suck as a husband. Maybe our wife hasn't been intimate with us in many months so we start trying al
Other People's Opinion
Well as this comes out it is Thanksgiving! Time for the family and friends to come together and talk and share in each other's lives for at least a day. Then again it could be you have family that is coming over for several days. We have grandma wondering when you are going to stop being the bachelor or maybe it is your mom who is hounding you to find a girl and settle down. Your Uncle is wanting to share with you his latest conspiracy theory about how the lizard people in the government are usi
The Root of Your Suffering
As we talked last week on episode 102 we looked at our circumstances and talked about how those circumstances are actually neutral. So with that where does all of our pain and suffering actually come from? That is actually what I wanted to examine this week. Where does the pain in your life come from if it isn't from the external forces in your life? This is where many people actually get a bit turned off by what I am about to say. The results of your pain and suffering are thanks to how you thi
Your Circumstance
There have been a few events in all our lives these events or circumstances are always happening to us. These events can be seen as great and positive or they can be perceived as being disastrous and awful. I have had a few big events happen here recently. I have started certification in a coaching course that I have drooled over for several tears and the opportunity has finally presented itself. So, I decided to take it. I am going to be sharing what I learn and as I go through the class my def
You Have To Start with a Dingy before you can Have a Yacht
I remember when I was young I was put out by the fact that I really wanted to be in a place of management yet I always had to start at the bottom. This feeling has gone on for many men for centuries. There are those who think they deserve to be in a higher position than where they are. They don't have the skills to even contemplate the amount of work that actually takes. Many workers only see that the Managers don't do the manual labor of that industry. They don't see all of the other tasks that
What I learned After 100 Episodes
It is time to review I was thinking of what I could do for a 100 episode. I guess I could have really hyped it up and probably should. Was surprised by how fast it went. It feels as if I should be just now hitting episode 50, yet here we are at one hundred. I need to put myself out there more. I don’t step out and talk to people nearly as much as I need to. If I want the business of Relaxed Male to become as successful as I dream it will then I have to start saying more than just, "Hey! How's th
Fighting Burnout
What is burnout Burnout is the loss of drive to do a particular task. Often the act of burning out isn't so much the problem as the effort we put in to try to push through that burnout. As a whole, it is a state of physical, emotional, and mental exhaustion. It happens when we become overwhelmed by the constant demands of a task. This often happens in an office scenario. Where the team is pushing to complete a project. Burnout often is very prevalent in the crunch for game programmers. What caus
Men's Need for Violence
Men need violence in their lives. For today's society that sounds almost scary. What! See this is toxic masculinity at its core! Men need to be removed from all of society because they are advocating everything violent. All the wars are fought because of men. Crimes are committed because of men. Well, this isn't exactly the case but the saying, Hard times make strong men strong men make good times good times make weak men weak men make hard times. this phrase shows how society has cycles, an
Standards, Why They Matter
What are standards? Your standard is a level of quality you accept. Too many people tolerate things below their claimed standards. Maybe it is the incompetence of a co-worker. Your spouses infidelity Examples of low level standards Poor health Over weight Relationships The quality of your friends marriage quality Work relations Career the Level of your income Being skipped over for promotions Why are they important? How do you raise your standards? Set healthy boundaries Voice what is bothering
The Perceived Virtues of Victims
If you have heard any other episodes or read any of my blog posts you know that I am not a fan of people who are victims. I often say, and rightfully so, victims are not respected because they dont earn anybodies respect. If that is the case then why do so many people turn to the victim mindset? Then you look at todays society and you see people parading around screaming about how they are victims of hate. Victims of white people. Victims of corporations. Victims of Slavery. Victims of a peanut
Timothy Dexter and The Laws of Attraction
You have heard of the Laws of attraction right? Some folks don't buy the whole laws of attraction they say it is only skill and discipline. These are the people who also believe that there are times that a person can get lucky. Well, I came across a guy in history who without realizing it applied the laws of attraction and achieved his wants and desires. This guy's name is Timothy Dexter. What is the laws of attraction The Laws of attraction has been around for a long time, but it first came to
Women Detest Nice Guys
There is one thing women absolutely hate and that is the one thing society has pushed on men. The Nice Guy. Ever since the industrial revolution men have been raised by their mothers. Dads leave to go to the factory and come home at the end of the day. They may get weekends with them but that's not a guarantee. Now because of this, we have been getting more and more nice guys showing up in the world. Nice guys are not nice. Nice Guys and People pleasers are liars and manipulators. Just about ev
You Are Not Broken
What does it mean when you are broken. Feeling a sense of no hope Beaten Whooped upon Feel like you need to just give up. Feel that you can't give any more Feel lost. How do you get back up? Understand what you are actually feeling. This is when you need that little extra push to get yourself past that sensation. That feeling of being broken often means that you are right at the cusp of a huge breakthrough. Feeling broken also can be helped by talking to a therapist. There is a whole group de
Are You Wetting the Leather?
When it comes to events in your life we have to take into consideration what you are starting with. Many times as men get frustrated with the lack of results that we get when we try something. The problem is what are you starting with? The meaning is this, guys, we want instant results. Many people grow frustrated with our jobs when we just started, we wonder why we are not higher up in the echelon of our jobs. We wonder why we have no credibility when we just start something. These are problems
How Men Talk To Each Other
Men talk to each other in a way that women and some modern males don’t understand. You hear talk of how toxic masculinity is the problem with society and part of that toxic masculinity is how men talk to each other. They mention how we tease young men as they start to develop facial hair and we suggest putting some milk on that peach fuzz and letting the cat lick it off. Some folks believe that is mean and hurtful. When in reality not exposing your son to those innocent taunts is setting him up
Aim For Awesome
What holds you back from taking the steps you are wanting to take? Now, these reasons can be many, but one of the biggest reasons is fear. We are afraid that we will change. We fear that our friends won’t like us. We are afraid of what happens if you succeed. We also fear what people will think if we fail. What happens if we screw something up? What if we are seen as a fraud. Do we really deserve this success if our idea takes off? According to Tripp Lanier, We want 4 things out of life. Free
A Pair Of Jeep Panties
There are times that life will throw you curveballs. You may have a boss that is just busting your hump and other days you may just drive up behind a jeep with a huge pair of panties on. What do you do? This is a choice you have to make. This was evident with a pair of Jeep panties I saw while over at the Byrd's Adventure Center. While I was at the Operation Tears of the 22: Off The Hardball event, the owner of the Jeep "Severance Package" talked often about how there are those who love the quir
The Difference Between a Therapist and a Coach
Main Topic Is coaching like therapy? The full answer is no they are not the same thing. What is therapy Therapy is used for finding and diagnosing mental illnesses. They help you find new and better coping mechanisms for past life events. Therapy is essentially for the past What is Coaching? It is the finding and helping with mindset problems. Coaches help people to reach their goals and climb to lofty heights that they are actually capable of. Coaches see flaws in thought because of faulty logg
Disempowering Thoughts
News going to be making some changes to when things are being released. I want to keep the current release schedule for the video of the week the Wednesday blog post and the podcast but I have lots of other plans for the site that are being ignored so Once a month there will be only a video and a podcast. If I can do the other plans and take out an item of the honey-do list and I still have time to write then you can consider the blog post a bonus. But I have been learning about some of the step
Your Basket of Beliefs
Question of The Week By The Brotherhood of Men What are some unknown laws of manhood? There really aren’t any unknown laws of manhood. There are things in men's lives that they need to do to have a great and masculine life. Men have purposes and it needs to be at the top of objectives to find out what that purpose is. Most times that purpose is something that is bigger than them. They are helping other people to achieve their purpose. That could be through a service-based life. Like being the be
The Folly of The Red Pill
Question of the Week By The Brotherhood of Men If you mess up your life in the eyes of family and friends, how do you get it back? Well, know that the phrase “messing up your life” is just a thought. It isn’t a fact. It is an opinion. That is all. You not living your life to the prescribed manual that your family has for you just means that isn’t how they would do it. It's not right nor is it wrong. Every event in your life is neutral it's neither right nor is it wrong. It's not positive nor is
Surviving a Divorce
Quick Mention about the Event Operation Tears of the 22, Off the Hardball, is coming quickly if you are a veteran this event is free, if you are not a vet then it is only $20 and you get a good time and you are helping out those veterans that are stuck in a dark place. Question of The Week by The Brotherhood of Men What is the most important thing to teach a child so they will be successful? That they are in control of their emotions. They can be happy or sad and that is OK. Nobody can make t
Making Peace with Porn, Talking with Matt Sinkovitz
The guest is Matt Sinkovitz He Helps men to overcome their attraction to porn. Social Media Facebook Group - Making Peace with Porn: We are Noble Men Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/matty2sinks/ How Can You Promote Change Your Brain on Porn - Book He has a How to Quit porn for good event
Why Marriages Fall Apart
Event: Operation Tears Of the 22 Off the Hardball This event is to help veterans to reset mentally SIgn up Question of the week be Brotherhood of Men Why is the divorce rate so high, especially in Western countries, if love marriages work? Well, there are theories as to why. The number one resin though is the No-fault divorce. This was started in 1969 by one of the greatest presidents the US had. Now Reagan later said he regretted signing the bull when he was governor of California. He did th
Navigating Midlife with John Teng
This week we have a conversation with John Teng. John is a public speaker author musician and lover of life. He has written a book called the Hero Mindset: Become(ing) the Hero of Your Own Adventure. This book is not just for men but also for women. People through the ages have struggled with one huge problem and that is the dreaded Midlife Crisis. John talks about how it actually isn't a crisis at all. Yeah, your life is almost halfway over but it really isn't a reason to panic and suddenly tr
The Art Of Being Present
Also, Check out the Operation Tears OF the 22 Off the Hardball happening on August 5-8 at Byrd Adventure Center The Question of The Week By The Brotherhood of Men Help me. How do I stop feeling hurt when people say mean things about me? Is what they are saying true? If not then why are you giving these people all your power? You are volunteering your peace of mind and happiness to people who obviously don’t have your happiness in mind. Stop with the victim mindset. You have the power to let so
The Trouble When You AssUMe
Question of the Week by The Brotherhood of Men I suffer from anxiety and depression. Not debilitating because I keep a job and social life. I'm 32 and have never left home. My parents are enablers and never pushed me out. What advice would you give someone like me? By the way, you phrased the question I would say you already know the answer. You need to move out. You can function out in society. You have already stated that you have a job and a social life. So move out. That anxiety you feel
Talking Relationships with Lindsey Marie
This week we have fellow coach Lindsay Marie Barber on the show. Lindsey is an expert on relationships and helps men to foster better relationships with those of the fairer sex. What is the biggest problem you see with men and their ability to effectively communicate? Website: https://lindseymariecoaching.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lindseymariecoaching/
The Worst Phrase We Are Teaching Our Kids
Join the Operation: Tears of the 22 Off the Hardball event for the veterans. WIll be happening on August 5-8 at Byrd Adventure Center In the beautiful Ozark National Park Sign up Today Question of The Week by The Brotherhood of Men All my favorite childhood things such as cartoons, video game characters, toys, etc., are becoming a thing of the past. Is this a sign that it's time to grow up and move onto other things? Well, I would ask what age are you? If you are 18 or older then yeah it is tim
Free Yourself From The Opinion of Others
Question of the Week by The Brotherhood of Me Why am I not happy in my life? There are a lot of reasons that you are lacking joy and happiness in your life. Since I don't know you from adam I can only guess as to why you are unhappy and restless. The number one reason I would surmise is that you don't have a purpose. What gets you out of bed each morning? People need to have a why a purpose, a passion Whatever you would like to call it, you need one. Something that allows you to struggle and g
The Grudge: The Heaviest of Weights
Join the Operation: Tears of the 22 Off the Hardball event for the veterans. WIll be happening on August 5-8 at Byrd Adventure Center In the beautiful Ozark National Park Sign up Today Question of the Week by The Brotherhood of Men How do I simplify life and be happy? How to always be happy? Well, I will break it to you you can and actually don't want to be happy all the time. How would it look if you were at your grandmother's funeral and you were just sitting around with a grin on your face? I
Playing The Victim Means You're Playing to Lose
Join me in helping Operation: Tears of the 22 and their first-time event over at the Byrd Adventure Center in Arkansas. This is happening between August 5-8 and are they ever putting up a bang-up event. There are going to be music and jeep rides on the many trails that span around the heart of the Ozark National Forest. on top of all that, there are going to be some amazing food trucks there to squash any hunger you have. We will also be having an auction where one of the lots is a 3-month coach
A Conversation with MJ Durkin
Special Announcement if you are a veteran of any branch of the military there is a special event going on with the guys of Operation: Tears of the 22 over at Byrd Adventure Center on August 5-8. There are going to be Jeep rides brought to you by local Jeep clubs, and giving you a chance to camp and enjoy nature, almost smack dap in the middle of the Ozark National Forest. If you are interested in joining me and other vets as we let loose go over to the event page and let Matt and Rich know that
The Folly of Happy Wife Happy Life
Mention The Operation: Tears of the 22 off the Hardball event is coming up on August 5-8 Free for veterans and their families. There are going to be Jeep clubs there for you to go rock crawling and other jeep trails. Fishing and hiking, Then there is the benefit of being our in nature. Event Page: https://www.facebook.com/tearsofthe22/ Question of the week Why does toxic masculinity exist in our society? The term toxic masculinity was a word created by people who needed a boogyman to
Are You An Asset or A Liability?
If you are a veteran there is an event just for you coming August 5-8 in Byrd, AR. It is being brought to you by Operation: Tears of the 22. There will be food trucks, music, talks, and Jeep rides. If you are interested you can get more information on Facebook event page Question Of The Week How does someone adapt to not having a mother throughout their lives and not be bitter? A boy needs his mother yes. The same as a boy needs his father. The same as a girl needs both parents as well. Now why
Get Outside!
Question of the week by The Brotherhood of Men How do I become a better father, husband, and steward of the community, despite having a rough past? by Bryan Whitson Build your 4 pillars of a good man. Your mind Read learn and grow. Learn about yourself. Read how to communicate with your son and with your spouse. As you read apply the lessons you learn. Write in a journal that way you are leaving a gift for your family. You are also able to see your improvements. Writing does a great job of
Finding Your Band Of Brothers
Announcements Announcements Workshop for Divorced Men New Gear for a better podcast - Zoom Podtrak P4 Question of the Week by The Brotherhood of Men Is it normal to feel discouraged about hobbies if your parents get too involved? I am going to assume that you are around the age of 14–18 years old, and still living in your parent's house. With that being the case the answer can be yeah. You are wanting to be your own person and when your parents jump into something that you like doing it is like
The Need For a Band Of Brothers
Question of The Week by The Brotherhood Of Men What is the best way to become a good father to a teenager you just met? Now I don't know all the details so let's do this in two parts. Those parts will be the most likely scenarios, This is your stepson and a boy in your neighborhood. Stepson If the boy is your stepson then your role isn’t the disciplinarian. This isn’t really gonna work for two reasons the teenager doesn’t have that type of bond with you. The other reason is that the biological
Do Words Have Power?
Question of the week by Brotherhood of Men Why am I getting angry over small things and ending up so much frustrated and at last beating myself or beating others? Well, there are a few points that can help you stop getting angry all the time. The first, is to know what is the opposite of love? It's not anger nor is it often thought of as being hate. The true opposite of love is fear. Fear destroys while love builds. The second is nobody can do anything emotionally to you. They can not make you
Men Need A Purpose
Question of the Week by The Brotherhood of Men How do I become stronger after a breakup? In the last 2 years I've had my heart broken twice… how do I begin to feel worthy again? How do you become stronger? Much like you become stronger physically you have to work on it. There are different fields you want to turn your attention to. Like your arms, legs, and chest. You have to work on 4 main pillars. Now I don't know if you are a man or a woman and these pillars really don't apply to just one sex
Using Affirmations Correctly
Question of the week By The Brotherhood of Men What is the motivation behind people that voluntarily choose to become parental figures to others even without solicitation? https://qr.ae/pNE9rO Why do affirmations work? Affirmations much like the power of I am, which is an affirmation in itself helps to set your mind into motion what it does best that is making sure it reaches that goal. They affirm a set of beliefs those beliefs can be positive or negative. The reason they work is that you belie
What Can You Control?
Question of the week by The Brotherhood of Men What's the best way of handling a teenager’s mood swing? Main topic We struggle with controlling things. Many times we try to control the stuff we can’t control. This often leads to lots of different types of suffering. We get angry and show frustration with those things that we are not able to control but really wish we could. What can you control? There are things in your life that you can actually control. These items can be broken down into thre
Are You an Attractive Person?
Question of The Week By The Brotherhood Of Men I wonder ...do know or have contact with anyone that helps single parents pull in the missing element of a mother or father energy in parenting as a single parent or co-parent? Andrea Fitzpatrick How do single parents help their child with the opposite sex influence? This can be single mothers with sons or single fathers with daughters. This also goes for single fathers needing to find A feminine influence for their sons and Girls need a masculine
Are You a Problem Magnet?
I bet you know someone who is a problem magnet. Maybe you are a problem magnet. What is a problem magnet you ask well the definition is quite simple it is that person who is always complaining about something going wrong in their life? Who’s a problem magnet? Always has a problem Has trouble letting go of problems Actively seeks out problems These are people who always have a crisis in their life Complaining is announcing that you want crap in your life Why do people become problem magnets
The Recipe for Happiness
Question of the Week by The Brotherhood Of Men I have low self-esteem, short height, no talent, no skills, average intelligence, and bad social skills. What do I do? How can you find happiness? Many people seem to think that they cant be happy. That is probably true. The reason they can't find a way to be happy is that they don't know the recipe for happiness. The Recipe Now, this isn't my recipe, and I didn't get it from my grandmother or anything. I am not really sure who I got this from but I
Powerful Questions to Ask Yourself
Main Topic How can you tap into the power of your mind? The answer is the question. How many times have you asked yourself useless questions? Like why am I fat? or Can I make a dumber question? The reason those are useless is that they go against what you are wanting to be answered. The great computer Your mind is a great computer and if you ask it a question it will find the answer to that question you ask. So, if you do ask why are so dumb it will find all the reasons you have a low IQ. If you
A Conversation with Jayden
This week I talk to my son Jayden about growing up and the challenges he faces. What he thinks is needed for you to be able to succeed. We talk about when he was growing up to when he discovered that rebelling doesn't serve all the time but why kids do rebel. How do young men of today need to do to reach their dreams and how do they approach life? They do want meaning and purpose much as many people do.
Holding Space
Main Topic What do does it mean to hold space? You may have heard people say this from time to time and it sounds a bit odd. Holding space. How could one possibly hold space for yourself or anybody else? That is what I want to actually help you understand this week. How do you hold space for anybody including yourself? What do I mean by holding space? In a nutshell, holding space is not acting right off the bad. We jump in to help our wives when they are having a hard day. We are trying to fix a
Building Respect
Question of the week by The Brotherhood Of Men. I handled all the finances. The kids well being, cleaned, full time career, still got told I wasn’t enough. So it’s really just up to what the woman thinks anonymous There is so much that is wrong with this comment first the guy is making the comment from a victim mindset. He does all of these things for the family and is getting no recognition or respect. This is sad but my question is what is his part of the situation. From what I was able to
Find Your System for Success
If you have followed this blog for a while you know I am big on setting up goals but I really suck at keeping them. I have claimed more than once I am an average man but I am becoming extraordinary. The reason I say this is because I am in the same boat you are. Maybe you are listening to this in 5 years down the road and you are thinking I could never get to where I am and that is going to be true if you keep telling yourself those types of lies. Yet If you have seen my record for keeping and c
I Have A Confession
The Question of the Week - Brought to you by The Brotherhood of Men Read Bryan Goodwin's answer to Do you feel that you are appreciated as a father? on Quora Question by Roderick Wrenn The topic of the week Hey men, This week is sort of a confessional that I want to get started and out in the open. Now I could start with an excuse and say that the problems I had this year were all because of 2020. Yet we both know that is an excuse and crap. Everything I talk about this week is my
Can Positivity be Toxic?
Question of the week - brought to you by The Brotherhood of Men Read Bryan Goodwin's answer to Should the government play any role in the parent/child relationship? Are there circumstances where outside involvement/support/restrictions is/are acceptable? Who gets the final say in what happens to a child? on Quora Main Topic Toxic what? Yeah The topic this week is a little out there. According to some people you can actually be too happy. Which in my thought is a bunch of whoey. And th
Men and The Problem with Porn
This week I have a new guest. His name is Michael Mcpherson he is a mens Coach who specializes in Male Sexuality. He helps men get over the problems of porn. we talk about why men get stuck on porn why it doesn’t serve us and the harm it creates to our sons. mod you are interested in Michael’s work you can read more in his book listen to his podcast Book: Everything You Never Learned About Sex Website: https://www.michaelmcpherson.co/ Ceremonial Chocolate Drink: https://www.flykakao.com/ Instagr
The First Year
Guests Big Brother Jake Warner - Ep 34 Tripp Lanier - Ep 39 Terry Tucker - Ep50 Coming next week Michael Mcpherson - Ep 53 I was on a few Podcasts Senior Moments The Pragmatic Idealist The Flipped Lifestyle Topics From The Man Box To the 4 pillars Talked a lot about Emotions and where they come from We talked about how to make a statement about your life And the different mindsets and why they matter to you. Stats Downloads: 2,130 First download was Nov 29, 2019
The Silent Contract
The Question of the week Brought by Brotherhood of Men The Main Topic This week we are talking about the silent contract or silent hit on those we say we love. The Silent Contract The silent contract is when we don’t do something to wait it out for the other person to get the hint and when the other person doesn’t take those hints it brings forth hurt feeling and frustration. Maybe it is the trash is getting full. Do you wait for your spouse to notice it and take it out on their own or do you
Finding Your Purpose with Terry Tucker
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First Empty Your Cup
Question of the Week Brought to you by The Brotherhood of Men Read Bryan Goodwin's answer to My mom and I have been getting into fights. We’re both tired of it, but always seem to argue. How do I make things good again? on Quora Main Topic There is an old story about how a University professor came to China and was talking to a Zen Master about Zen. As they talked the Zen Master was serving tea. The master started pouring the tea till it was right up to the lip of the cup. Then he kep
Make a Statement About Your Life
The Question of The Week by The Brotherhood Of Men Read Bryan Goodwin's answer to How can I get good grades living with a toxic family? My stepdad hates me and always starts yelling at my mom or just in general when it is a lecture or test. on Quora Main Topic Have you even made a Life Statement? Do you even know what A life statement is? What is a life statement? This is a statement that give you direction into the best way to use your talents and your core values to help you mak
Find Who You Are
Question of the Week - Courtesy of The Brotherhood of Men Comes from a Youtube Comment but user D in response to the last episode Don't Settle "Don't settle for what? Lmfao. Some people don't have any choice in their circumstances you ignorant f***. By the way, no matter what action you take during your life, it ends EXACTLY the same way -…" D Youtube User Now sadly either he deleted the comment shortly after posting it or Youtube removed it. Either way, there is something wonderful abo
Don’t Settle
Question of the Week By The Brotherhood of Men Why do Grandparents like to make quarrels in the house? Main Topic Why you don't want to become complacent. Becoming complacent causes you to rust. you miss many different opportunities that if you are on the lookout you could easily find. I call this complacency rusting. Because we men lose valuable skills when we start to rust. You can find rust forming on the 4 pillars of a Relaxed Male. Examples of rusting Mind - Fixed beliefs and excuses
Cancel The Canceling
This week we are talking about the current atmosphere in the US there is a lot of contention and lack of communication. We have the right rubbing the very being that drives the left up the wall. We are throwing “evidence” of why one side is right and the other side is wrong. So much that Facebook is almost unusable. I am actually thinking of installing the “Remove All Politics” Extension to my browser. Now it isn’t because I don’t like a political discussion from time to time. I was poking mult
Listening to Podcast
Podcasts are becoming better known for the information they provide than just 3 guys and one brain. This week I just talk about why podcasts are so good and how they help you to become a better person
Take Both Sides of The Story
Why are both sides of the story important? often we spend way too much time thinking about what people should do instead of understanding where they are coming from. We focus on how we can control the situation instead of understanding and connect with other people. We write scripts in our heads all the time. We think of how something should be done and rarely get the other side of the story. We make a crappy first draft and then leave it at that. Instead of revising our script to allow for t
The Secret to Your Success
Today's topic is about being successful. Why are you having trouble finding success in your financial life, or maybe the relationship between you and your son? The reasons are numerous, or should I say excuses are numerous. The truth is you have all the same abilities to be successful as the next person so why are you not on top of the world? The heart of the matter is how you are thinking of the solution. This episode sort of ties together the why Gratitude, and the abundant mindset work. Wh
Getting Back Up
Main topic How to get back up after being handed a defeat Look at that failure as a learning experience. We all struggle and we all fall down. We fail at something. What do you do get back up or just lay there? Look at all the underdog stories. We root for rocky to get back up. We cheered when the US hockey team whooped up on the Communists. We celebrate the triumphs. Yet we as people shy away from struggling. Our amygdala's wants us to be comfortable and sadly we avoid the struggle. I do
Are You Looking through the Windshield or the Rearview mirror?
Are you driving through life by looking through the windshield or are you driving by the rearview mirror? So many times we look in the rearview mirror instead of the windshield while going through life. Why do we do this? There is a reason we drive looking out of the windshield of a car and not through the rearview mirror. First off there is the size of the viewport. A rearview mirror is a very small piece as apposed to all the real estate that is the windshield. So look ahead and there ar
Raising Dangerous Boys with Tripp Lanier
What does it mean to be dangerous? For our guest host this week it means to stop playing it safe. Don’t spend your time worry so much about what the neighbors think and pursue the FLAP. We all want Freedom Love Aliveness and Peace. To attain these four wonderful items you have to examine why are you not reaching those levels? Whatis it that you are afraid is going to happen if you do achieve your goals. So being dangerous means stop playing it safe. So many men who do play it safe do so because
The 4 Pillars of Relaxed Male: The Man's Community
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4 Pillars of a Relaxed Male: The Man's Soul
This week we are talking about The Man’s Soul. This pillar has a couple of different facets. Not only does it mean building and creating but Feeding your soul is also tied to mental health. What does a Man’s soul mean? In a nutshell, it is being creative. We are said to be made in God’s image He is also called the creator. He created the Heavens and the earth and all that goes with that. If we are made in his image then it would be thought that we are creators too. Be A Creator So to feed your
The 4 Pillars: The Man's Mind
Why does a man’s mind need to be kept up? That is what we talk about this week on our continuing series about the 4 pillars of a relaxed Male or maybe fo a confident man. I don’t know I am playing with the thought and still working through some of the details. Either way, the principles of a man’s mind will stay the same. What do I mean by a man’s mind You have to feed your mind to keep it strong. Don’t mean just puzzles It is you You need it to make decisions You have the power of rea
4 Pillars of Relaxed Male: The Man's Body
Question of the week https://www.quora.com/Is-it-better-to-reward-good-value-or-punish-bad-behavior-during-parenting/answer/Bryan-Goodwin-10?ch=10&share=1a1465c2&srid=p0zJe Main topic Why is the man’s body important to living a relaxed male lifestyle? The body is where you are at. Yeah, you are also in your mind but your body represents who you are. Are you fat or just slightly pudgy? Maybe you are a bean pole. How we look is important and tells the world a lot of what we think of ourselves.
A Conversation on Race with Big Brother Jake Warner
Today I called an audible. I was going to do the first of the 4 pillars of Relaxed Male but instead, I decided to have a conversation with a good friend of mine Jake Warner. And we explored the challenging but best ways to approach racism in today’s environment. We explore what best can be done to address the issue from just shutting one’s mouth and listening with empathy, to have those scary conversations. You will learn more and connect better when you do have a You can find Jake at all the p
The 4 Pillars of Relaxed Male
Why are there pillars Like many things, you have to have a foundation to build on. Each pillar is centered around a portion of men’s life that needs to be kept up so that he can have a full and happy life. Life a table with 4 legs you can have 3 out of the 4 and it will do ok but it isn’t stable. One wrongly places event and the table falls. How do the pillars work? Each pillar points to a part of a man’s life that is important for him to have a well-rounded life. Missing one isn’t going to wre
Denying Your Emotions
Question of the week John Dude, I thought this was a podcast that was supposed to help dads with their sons. When are you going to start helping those dads with their sons? Main Topic We are often stoic for many reasons but can that be overdone? Yes, the answer is simply yes. It can be overdone. We as people develop different means to cope with the different events in our lives. Often though we use these coping mechanisms to help us avoid uncomfortable situations or events. As men, we have a dif
You Are Not Broken
Main event I have seen many people who go through life looking through the rearview mirror of life. A wise man once told me that is why the rearview mirror is so small. Yeah, the pst is important but what is important to you is in front of you. We all have different experiences in life we like to think that they define who we are and that simply isn’t the case. We often will look to occurrences that simply don't Your life is always made up of experiences What does it mean to be loveable? Yo
The Man Box Part 2
This is part 2 of a 2 part series I would recommend you listen to episode 29 first. Now, this is a new concept for me and it was introduced to me from a friend of mine. She is a counselor who works with sex offenders. She was talking about how they use the information about The Man Box to help them. Now This episode is more than likely going to drift on the political a bit. This isn’t a political site. This website is men focused and meant to help men raise strong confident boys to they can be l
The Man Box Part 1
Now, this is a new concept for me and it was introduced to me from a friend of mine. She is a counselor who works with sex offenders. She was talking about how they use the information about The Man Box to help them. Now This episode is more than likely going to drift on the political a bit. This isn’t a political site. This website is men focused and meant to help men raise strong confident boys to they can be leaders in society. To do that we sadly have to get our political feet wet today. Aga
Powerful questions you need to ask yourself
Why are questions important? Your brain is a computer and will look for the answer you ask it. What does this make possible? Big Leap Questions Am I willing to increase the amount of time each day that I feel good inside An inner sense of well being An I willing to increase the amount of time my whole life goes well Work relationships Am I willing to feel good and have my life go well all the time? If you argue your limitations you get to keep them. Stop fighting to keep your limitations What’s
Having Gratitude
Main topic Having gratitude can overcome most obstacles. How does gratitude help? It changes your mindset to one of the abundance EP14 - https://www.relaxedmale.com/ep-14-the-abundance-mindset/ You can't be negative when you see the abundance you have. It is the root of an abundant mindset - https://www.relaxedmale.com/why-gratitude-is-important/ while being grateful for what you have you are more open for seeing what is possible You are easier to get along with You are all around a happier per
Using Fear to Your Advantage
Question of the Week This weeks question is from Quora https://qr.ae/pNyZ5J Main topic Fear, is something we have all experienced in one form or another sometime in our life. I remember when I was a little kid I was in the kitchen at night and grabbing some snacks I wasn’t supposed to have and suddenly a large column candle we had on in there for smell goods and emergency lighting if the electricity went out suddenly fell off of its holder. Blam! The sense of fear that a ghost was about to star
How Did You Get There?
One of the biggest factors that will hold a person back is the story and thoughts of how they arrived in the current circumstance they find themselves in. There are times that people may find themselves in a deep dark hole. When they look back on how they arrived there they want to point their fingers at anybody else other than the real person who is to blame. Look at an addict. They blame others for the circumstance that they are in. Yet in all reality, they are the ones who made the choice to
The Stories We are Living Out
We all have a story in our head. Yet we often have the wrong story. The story you tell is apart of whether or not you are going to succeed. Now, these stories are yours. But are you telling your story in the right frame of light or are you perhaps living somebody else story? Doing this doesn’t serve you and often it doesn’t benefit you in any way. What is meant by your story? Your story is what are you telling yourself. It can also be the story others are saying about you. Others can have whatev
Avoid the Crab Bucket
Maybe you have heard of the analogy of the bucket of crabs. This is where it is easy to keep crabs in a bucket because as one crab tries to crawl out the other crabs in the bucket grab him and drag him back in. This represents the people in your circle. These people are your friends and family members who have an invested emotional interest in keeping you safe. There is that darn word again. Safe. Why is being safe such a bad thing? We work so hard on keeping others safe and in today’s standar
You Dramatic Life
Why so dramatic? I bet you know many people who seem to love drama. They overblow what the worst that can happen. They relish gossip and add details to stories they hear. Yet I bet you didn’t know that you also delve into drama quite a bit too. Maybe you know you do and if so good job at least you are more aware of what is happening than many people. What is drama? When I refer to drama I am not meaning plays or acting. I am meaning when we allow our reptile part of the brain to add all sorts of
The Benefits of Joining a Mastermind
The benefits of a mastermind are plenty and I wanted to share some specific benefits that you gain when you are a part of a mastermind. You are a part of a community You don’t have to worry about feeling lone nearly as much as if you were going on your own. You will have people who have been in your shoes before and can anticipate what may be around the unforeseen corner. You have people who can help and offer you support. Support In a mastermind, you have people who can give you the needed advi
Taking Action
If you want to succeed you have to take action. Sounds like that is a no brainer. Yet one of the reasons most people don’t succeed is because they don’t take the steps they need to take. They will hymn and haw over what they should or should not do Why people don’t take action Fear Afraid of what others will think Fear that they will change Afraid that they will lose their friend's Procrastination (fear) Afraid of what others will think Fear that they will be seen as not good enough They don’t b
Ending the Suffering
We start this episode off with a little rant about the changing times and how does this goes with why we suffer. We have hard all about how people suffer. Yet we don’t really look at what causes suffering. Why do we suffer? We suffer because we resist our emotions we try to make people do what we feel is best for them By not being in the present We look into our past more than we need to
The Biggest Liar is The People Pleaser
So many people say they hate liars. You cant trust them. Yet many of those people are the worst liars around. Now there are two types of people who are inherently liars. No, I am not talking about Navy recruiters or politicians. I am talking about Addicts are liars and the other natural liar is a people pleaser. I want to talk this week about the second. I will address the first at some time down the road, but today we are looking at people pleasers. Why People Pleasers? People pleasers a
The Fixed Mindset
What is a fixed mindset? The Fixed mindset is the thought that you are limited in what you are able to achieve by what your talent is. We often tell kids that they are smart and this is a huge problem for when the kids actually hit a limit on what their smarts are able to create. This problem can cause kids to shy away from a challenge and keep them from learning that getting something wrong is actually alright. It shows that you are able to improve. The fixed mindset causes problems beca
The Growth Mindset
The concept of Growth mindset and it's counterpart Fixed mindset comes from Stanford Professor Carol Dweck Ph.D. in her book Mindset. In this book, she talks in detail what each mindset is and give an example after examples of people who display both sides. From Dorothy Delay the violin teacher from The Juilliard School of Music to Jack Welch, the man who saved General Electric. Carol talks about key points that exemplifies why a growth mindset is needed if you want to succeed and why the fix
The Scarcity Mindset
This week talking about the opposite of the abundant mindset in Episode 14. That is a scarcity mindset and the problems it can cause in your efforts of being successful. We all have problems with negative thinking. Those negative thoughts are normal and have a purpose but they don’t serve us as they did in the caveman days. We use to not have enough and we had to fight for all that we had. Today that is still somewhat true but now scarcity is an element that holds us back. It keeps us safe and
The Abundant Mindset
What is an abundant mindset? People with an abundant mindset feel freer to give and share because they don’t see that the resources in their life are in scare supply. They have the motto of There is more where that came from. Often people who aim for and achieve big goals are people who have an abundance-oriented mindset. Because they aren’t worried about what they don’t have, abundant mindset folks are generally happier and easier to get along with they like to take people on their journeys
Its About The Mindset
What is a mindset? It is the story you tell yourself. It is a set of beliefs that help you in determine how badly you are wanting a particular outcome. A mindset is basically a set of thought habits. So this helps to set whether you are actually going to achieve that outcome or not. It is able to be changed. It isn’t easy and you have to stay after it. Some people associate your mindset with the subconscious but it is something you can actively shift and start believing and approaching life in a
Be Yourself
So there are so many people following each other it is actually pretty hard to see who is really leading. From Tattoos being a kind of interesting piece of art on bikers and sailers to now you see almost everyone with a tattoo.What makes leaders and successful people are that they are different. They don't march to anybody's drum but their own. Though people around them try to force them into their square hole. These people are unique. Don ImusHoward SternRush LimbaughWhat makes each of the
What is Anxiety?
There are times that we are just flat out stressed. There are family duties, work duties, and other random problems that just want to heap upon us so that we just start to have a hard time concentrating. That stress we feel can create moments of higher than normal anxiety and the different health problems that the increasing levels of cortisol supply from high blood pressure, to lack sleep, upset stomach and lowered immune systems. Stress isn’t good for us when we are in a constant state. From t
Whats Holding You Back
Talking about failing to even start today. What holds you back? What are the factors that keep you from even taking getting far enough down the road to even feel stuck? Fear This is the biggest of all and encompasses just about everything that makes you not even want to jump off the diving board into the pool of cool success. Fear of Results But we want results right? Yes, we do. yet many times those results can be scary to think of. There are people who are afraid of what's going to ha
Why Do We Feel Stuck?
We all feel stuck from time to time. The problem is when we feel stick and don’t know how to get past that feeling. We often are stuck and accept it as normal. We cope with the feeling and it often becomes normal. That is why so many people have started their great American novel, and it dies there. These folks start their novel and they are stuck and the fruit of their work just dies on the vine. Why do people, get stuck? There are several different reasons for them feeling stuck P
Being Self-Reliant
So many men have become dependent that it is actually scary to think of being self-reliance. Though being able to rely on yourself is an important part of being a complete and balanced man. Many people depend on others to make them happy or to provide for them. This does nothing but breed discontent in the person who is relying on others to be taken care of. The other people who are taking care of you may do it out of the kindness of their heart for a while be eventually they start to look at yo
Not Happy? Are you Supposed to be happy?
Some people believe they deserve to be happy. Is this really true? This is what we explore in today’s podcast episode. Many people believe they are supposed to feel happy all of the time and then get flustered and even downright upset when they feel anything other than happiness. They are plagued by anxiety because they aren’t happy. People do so many different attempts at not feeling that anxiety that they start to fight all emotions. It is almost like a child who doesn’t get their way they pac
Have An After Action Review
A quick and shorter episode this week compared to Episode 5 at least. So this week talking about after-action reviews. This is a review strategy that can help you become better and learn from your mistakes faster. It does take some practice to think of it and practice it after different actions. Basically as a whole what you want to be able to do is after any event ask yourself the following questions. What did I do good? What did I do wrong? What needs to be improved What can be learned from t
Set a Goal To Have More Goals
The end of the year is near. Have you set your goals yet? Do you even plan to set goals? This episode is all about goals. We cover the Who, What, How’s, and why’s of Goal setting. Why set goals? Goals are important to men who want a change. What type of change? Any change you desire. You want to be wealthy. You have to set goals. If you want to have a happy marriage you have to have goals. Goals are the road map of your life. You can get around without a map but you will not guarantee that you
Emotional Discussion
Emotions, it is one of those conversations many people don’t care to have. Men often see emotions as a messy hindrance in their daily life that many men avoid some emotions though if you were to believe some media sources you would think that men love to be angry and brutish all the time. This is because of people often don’t understand emotions. They avoid what they deem to be negative emotions while perusing only good feeling emotions. Both of these tactics with your feelings are not good nor
Responsibility, Why it is Important?
What makes a man? That is a big question. Many people ask that all that time. There are Quora topics on what a person has to do to be a man. Yet the answer is actually pretty straight forward. With all the navel-gazing many do over this topic, the answer can be summed up on a comparison. You have one man who is in his parent’s basement he is the stereotypical guy who just is aimless and has no drive. He really doesn’t have a why. Why should he? Now you have another guy who is in his apartment. H
We are missing the Connection
I called an audible this week and decided to change the direction of the podcast. One big problem I had was the audio quality was seriously lacking so I dropped my earbuds mic for just the microphone on my phone. This has increased my sound quality a lot and the sound will improve down the road when I get a digital recorder for the show. The other reason I changed some stuff in this show already is that I got called back to why I was doing my blog and now this podcast. The reason is that we are
How is Relaxed Male Going to change my mindset?
Hello men, So today we have our very first episode of the new podcast the Relaxed Male. This is another channel that will help men find out that they have more potential of achieving their dreams than originally thought Now, this episode does a brief overview of the 4 pillars of Relaxed Male. These pillars are The Man His Mind His Community Creativity Each of these pillars helps men to find find the needed ground so that they can face the daily challenges that show up. Often, men, these days a
The Relaxed Male Podcast Trailer
So what can you expect from this podcast? LIfe changing ideas and seeing how your thoughts change your results. The Relaxed Male Podcast attacks the root of the problem and helps men remove the nice guy in their lives so that they can start living their life on their terms. That way they can get the fulfillment and meaning they have desired.