We Only Do One Take Podcast
We Only Do One Take Podcast
Welcome to the We Only Do One Take Podcast.
Each week Turch and Kieran talk about all of the news articles you would have missed during the week while drinking beers.
Every so often they have guests on to chime in with zingers.
If you like banter, weird news stories and terrible jokes, you are going to like this.
We Only Do One Take Podcast , it’s a real shitshow
Episode 260 – Kieran’s Car Break-in and Fake Pandas – We Only Do One Take Podcast
In this episode of the We Only Do One Take Podcast, Kieran shares the shocking story of his car being broken into while his roommate casually watched! Meanwhile, Turch expresses his frustration with Spotify’s ridiculous 15 audiobook limit and takes us down memory lane with the worst Silicon Valley inventions like Juicero and Hidrate. Also, more wild theories and proof that pandas aren't real!
Don't miss out on this hilarious, action-packed episode!
#Podcast #WeOnlyDoOneTake #CarBreakIn #Spotify
Episode 259 – Guitar Store Drama, Soccer Rage & Pizza Finance – We Only Do One Take Podcast
In Episode 259 of the We Only Do One Take Podcast, Turch goes off about guitar store staff who won't let you try guitars and vents about trimming his plants. Kieran and Turch also share their frustrations over the Australian soccer team losing to weak opponents, Kieran gives some questionable financial advice about not buying Dominos pizza on a “pay later” option, and we watch footage from the Melbourne protest against making weapons. Plus, we
end with some good ol' dad jokes! You won’t want to
Episode 258 – Infinite Money Glitch & Peeing Outside – We Only Do One Take Podcast
In Episode 258 of the We Only Do One Take Podcast, Turch goes off on how people are still living in fear of COVID and the hilarity of men peeing outside. We dive into bizarre news from Japan, including the government’s plan to encourage women to move to the countryside and have babies. Plus, we take a closer look at the viral Chase Bank 'infinite money glitch' TikTok trend that’s actually bank fraud, and Turch shares the best joke ever with Kieran. Don’t miss this jam-packed episode full of ra
Episode 257 - Father's Day Hijacking and the Open Plan Office Scam - We Only Do One Take Podcast
In Episode 257 of the We Only Do One Take Podcast, Turch unleashes a rant about how his Father's Day is being hijacked by his dad and father-in-law. We also dive into why open plan offices are a total scam, laugh along with Kieran’s best dad jokes, and watch a guy hilariously explain why inflation is ‘great’ because everything costs double. Plus, the boys react to proud fat people demanding chairs without arms and give a sneak peek at their upcoming country album. Tune in for laughs, rants, and
Episode 256 - Bins, Bots, and Bad Jokes - We Only Do One take Podcast
In Episode 256, Turch goes off on the government for spending money on thinner plastic bins—what's next, paper straws for garbage?
Kieran brings the bizarre tale of self-driving Waymo cars in San Francisco, keeping residents awake with their endless honking duels. Plus, the shocking story of a fugitive from a 2004 murder case found working as a police officer.
We also dive into some dad jokes penned by Turch himself and endure the 50th episode of Jack Savich's dreadful podcast, "Guitar of Consc
Episode 255 - Gas Bills, Olympic Absurdities & 11,000 Chicken Wings?! - We Only Do One Take Podcast
In Episode 255 of the We Only Do One Take Podcast, Turch and Kieran dive into the outrageous cost of natural gas and their shocking gas bills. They then take a hilarious look at the bizarre sports featured in the Olympics and explore the quirky ways Orthodox Jews navigate
Shabbat laws. Plus, we venture into the weird and wonderful world of hobby horsing, discuss a wild news story about a Chicago woman who stole 11,000 boxes of chicken wings over 18 months, and wrap things up with some of Turch's
Episode 254 – A Look Into A LOLCOW – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Today we look in to Jake Savich.
Jake is our LOLCOW.
He is a the Creator of Guitar Of Consciousness, Facilitator @ Access Consciousness, an Energy transformation guitar wizard and an International speaker.
And he is super weird.
We do a deep dive into him!
Episode 253 – Holiday Stories – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch tells us a bunch of holiday stories.
Kieran goes to Bowen
And Trump gets shot.
All this and more!
Episode 252 – Mother’s Day – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch tells us about his Mother’s Day.
Kieran gets mad.
And the boys look at Plus Sized Park Hoppers.
All this and more!
Episode 251 – Golfin’ – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch writes a book
Kieran plays 2 games of golf
And we try to avoid ads.
All this and more!
Check out Turch’s book
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0D29WKCKY
Episode 250 – Weatherman – We Only Do One Take Podcast
The boys celebrate 250 episodes and Kieran’s birthday!
Kieran tells us the weather.
Turch wants to go to the strippers.
And Teresa sings us happy birthday.
All this and more!
Episode 249 – Farting At The Gym – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran hold in a fart at PT.
Turch has an uneventful Easter.
And some Fat Cheerleaders dance to the Baby Elephant Walk.
All this and more!
Episode 248 – Wheelchair Heros – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran goes to a comedy gala.
Turch hates all wheelchair bound superheros for kids.
And the boys watch a fat woman get stuck in a foam pit.
All this and more!
Episode 247 – The Wrong Gown – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran gets the wrong gown.
Turch tells us that 4 out of 10 Americans hate math, which is the majority.
And the mental advantage trans women haven in sport.
All this and more!
Episode 246 – Window Taxed – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch hates the optometrist
Kieran writes jokes for Turch.
And Trump is back in the news!
All that and more!
Episode 245 – Stuck On A Zipline – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch knows self driving cars won’t work.
Kieran reads a bunch of actually funny jokes
And the boys watch a female SWAT team fail at an obstacle course.
All this and more!
Episode 244 – Super Glue – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch hates getting super glue on his fingers.
Kieran is a BBQ master.
And the boys tell more jokes.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on:
• SoundCloud - https://soundcloud.com/weonlydoonetakepodcast
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Episode 243 – Somatic Movements – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran shows us how to cleans trauma with somatic movement.
Turch gets Kieran to read jokes
And Turch injures his finger
All this and more!
Episode 242 – An Interview with Matt Farley – We Only Do One Take Podcast
The boys have Matt Farley from Motern Media on the show!
Matt Farley is an American filmmaker, musician, and songwriter who has released more than 25,000 songs! He is also a film maker, just releasing him 15th film.
The boys talk to him about his music, his writing and his fans.
All this and more in this week’s episode!
This interview is also available on YouTube:
https://youtu.be/VfbFBM9DBq0
Check out Matt here:
https://www.amazon.com.au/Motern-Method-Matt-Farley/dp/B09PHJS3JW
https://open.spot
Episode 241 – Fired From Harvard – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran tells us about the head of Harvard getting fired
The boys love golf.
And Turch talks about fat kids.
And Turch and Kieran are on the Epstein list?
All this and more
Episode 240 – More Bad Stand - Up – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran goes to Ikea.
Turch is sorting out his poo schedule.
The boys want to go to FatCon
And we laugh at, not with, Tom Myers.
All this and more!
Episode 239 – An OnlyFans Christmas – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch hates new articles that are really OnlyFans model advertisement.
Kieran misses the airport business lounge.
And the boys get ready for Christmas.
All this and more!
Episode 238 – Saving The Water – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran tells us how to rescue water from a water bottle.
Turch tells us more of our technological dystopian future.
And the boys use AI to make the worst stringers.
All this and more!
Episode 237 – Turch’s Birthday – We Only Do One Take Podcast
It’s Turch’s birthday!
Kieran gives Turch a gift.
Turch makes jokes in the style of Norm MacDonald.
And the boys explain finance to Trevor Noah.
All this and more!
Episode 236 – Propaganda – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch makes propaganda.
Kieran hates dad jokes, but loves jokes about women.
And the boys get hydrated.
All this and more!
Episode 235 – A Chat With A Fart Fetishist– We Only Do One Take Podcast
On this very special epsiode we interview Raj, an eproctophile (a fart fetishist), and host fot he Fart Fetish Podcast.
We dive deep into the fetish: his experience, how it works and dozens of questions asked by our community.
Check Raj’s podcast out here: https://eproctophilia.org/podcast.html
Make sure you follow us on:
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• Instagram
Episode 234 – Margaritas – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran hates movies that are too long.
Turch loves Paul McCartney, but hates his fans.
And they both hate elevators that are controlled via an app.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on:
• SoundCloud - https://soundcloud.com/weonlydoonetakepodcast
• iTunes- https://podcasts.apple.com/podcast/id1332596345?ct=podlink&mt=2&app=podcast&ls=1
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• Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/weonlydoonetakepodcast/
• Spoti
Episode 233 – Squatty Potty – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran doesn’t understand why someone would need a squatty potty.
Turch hates cars turning wide.
And the longest High Calorie Individuals segment yet.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on:
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• Sp
Episode 232 – Responding To A Flat Earther – We Only Do One Take Podcas
The bonus get questioned about their episodes about the Flat Earth
The boys don’t understand the whole Palestine Israel thing.
And more dad jokes than you can handle.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on:
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• iTunes- https://podcasts.apple.com/podcast/id1332596345?ct=podlink&mt=2&app=podcast&ls=1
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• Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/weonlydoonetakep
Episode 231 – Girl Maths – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran learns about girl maths.
Turch likes the Roman Empire.
And we listen to a song about eating cum.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on:
• SoundCloud - https://soundcloud.com/weonlydoonetakepodcast
• iTunes- https://podcasts.apple.com/podcast/id1332596345?ct=podlink&mt=2&app=podcast&ls=1
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• Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/weonlydoonetakepodcast/
• Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/6ywKEhfws
Episode 230 – Feederism – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Plenty of Fat People News this week.
Kieran hates the mention of a meat tax.
And Turch hates Kieran’s dad jokes
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on:
• SoundCloud - https://soundcloud.com/weonlydoonetakepodcast
• iTunes- https://podcasts.apple.com/podcast/id1332596345?ct=podlink&mt=2&app=podcast&ls=1
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Episode 229 – The Hall Of Cost – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran find his new favourite rapper, Sexyy Red
Turch is thankful he is no longer in the dating pool.
And the boys go into more conspiracy theories.
All this and more!
Episode 228 – Turch Plays Every Music Stinger – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran hates people who only run 5km
Turch hates loud toilets.
And every single music bit is played on the show!
All this and more!
Episode 227 – Logging Keystroke And Eating Bananas – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Reb is on the show! He hates Myki.
Kieran helps rewrite more Tom Myers jokes.
And Turch talks about Lizzo.
All this and more!
Episode 226 – Kieran Is Hosting The Commonwealth Games – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch is one a rampage! Ont he cards is climate change protesters/extinction protests, food that is too big and women in the workplace.
Kieran tells us about big barbeque.
And the boys watch a thot.
Episode 225 – Kieran Hates Hipsters – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran buys meat rubs, and hates hipsters
Turch hates bad female boomer comedy.
And the boys laugh at Biden
All this and more!
Episode 224 – More Music Stingers – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch makes more music stingers
Kieran learns about a man who ate a bin chicken
As we find out there are no medium rappers
All this and more!
Episode 223 – The Greatest Dad Joke Ever – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Special guest on the show, Damian (who helped test dildos).
Turch tells the greatest dad joke ever
And Kieran doesn’t understand trans boobs.
All this and more!
Episode 222 – A Podcast For Women – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch looks into podcasts for women
Kieran wants to complete a food eating challenge
And the boys discuss the importance of gatekeeping.
All this and more!
Episode 221 – Dad Jokes – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch hates work meetings.
Kieran learns the phrase ‘womanface’
And the boys have a new music bit to introduce the dad joke segment.
All this and more!
Episode 220 – Straight Up Pimping – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch solves the diversity crisis by becoming a pimp.
Kieran loves beautiful women, like Lizzo.
And the boys find out about taxidermed drone birds (aka trans birds)
All this and more!
Are you funnier than Tom Myers?
We provide our good friend Tom Myers, some comedy advice in Part 2 of Episode 218.
Episode 219 – Trans Rights Are More Mens Rghts – We Only Do One Take Podcast
The boys discuss the toilet situations.
Look at Chat GPT’s joke writing ability.
And chatty GPSs.
All that and more!
EP 218 (Part 1)- Kierans Birthday Special
EP 218 (Part 1)- Kierans Birthday Special by We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 217 – Tom Myers Can’t Tell A Joke Properly – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch and Kieran go through Tom Myers’s material and decide to start a new project.
Episode 216 - Will you help me repair my door? - We Only Do One take Podcast
Turch gets cancelled! Afroman has no door and Kanye West hates on ….
All this and more in episode 215!
Episode 215 – It’s Not Over Until The Fat Lady Sings – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran becomes a meat snob.
Turch makes a joke about suicides.
And both boys think Andrew Tate is an idiot.
All this and more!
Episode 214 – Erotic Stories – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch thinks he is growing up.
Kieran wants a flying car made by Trump.
And the boys listen to an erotic story from Literotica.
All this and more!
Episode 213 – How To Measure A Penis – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran is in studio to tel us how to measure a penis.
Turch hatezs terrible zippers on baby clothes.
And the boths try to understand how ‘they’ are influencing the 2023 Satanic Panic.
All this and more!
Episode 212 – Turch Is A Dad – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch is a dad!
Kieran is back in studio to talk about his trip to India.
Turch hates medical staff and shares stories about his nonno and dad.
Plus we listen to the final jokes of the Seinfled AI.
All this and more!
Episode 211 – Toilet Calendars – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Damien is our co-host for this episode, so it’s a music based episode!
Why do people have calendars on their wall of their toilet?
And we listen to a bunch of… ‘talented’ musicians.
And we listen to 469 amazing sounds!
All this and more!
Episode 210 – The White Girl White Wine Spitzer Show – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran is still away, so this week we have Dan from AMR's Barre Talk in studio!
Turch loves Japanese Gwen Stefani
And Dan and Turch review every drink.
All this and more!
Episode 209 – How To Squirt – We Only Do One Take Podcast
On this episode., Kieran is gone, so we have Teresa from Story for a Song and Bad Poets Society as a cohost!
Teresa also hates doctors. Turch hates boomer get togethers.
And they both learn to squirt from Abbie Chatfield.
All this and more!
Episode 208 – The Boys Are Back On Twitch – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran and Turch are back live on twitch!
Turch talk Taliban and Pirnce Harry's penis.
And Kieran hates doctors.
All this and more!
Episode 207 – The 2023 Homeless, Car - Less Christmas – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran has no car
Turch is homeless
And they love Christmas.
All this and more!
Episode 206 – Rats Eating Receipts – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran picks up the wrong napkin.
Turch’s brain connects impossible things.
And Kieran’s mind is blown.
All this and more!
Episode 205 – Fuck Banks – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch hates banks.
Kieran nearly dies.
And the boys leave early to watch the World Cup.
All this and more!
Episode 204 – Ranking The Races – We Only Do One Take Podcast
The boys decide it’s time to rank all the races
Episode 203 – The Dad Bod – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran laughs at a Starbucks barrister
Turch hates Uber drivers
And we all love Ye.
Episode 202 – Hipsters And Cash – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran can’t stand the hipsters in Brunswick.
Turch can’t find people to take his $50 note.
And we deep dive into fatphobia and dating.
Plus, the boys get into netball.
All this and more!
Episode 201 – Last Call – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch hates the Commonwealth Games.
Kieran hates scientists.
And we learn how to play the James Bond chord.
All this and more!
Episode 200 – The Big 200th Show – We Only Do One Take Podcast
It’s our 200th episode! Get your big fake tits out!
Turch dives into the conspiracy that Pandas are not real.
And Kieran hates bad food.
We dive into how being a landlord works.
Plus a word from Abbie Chatfield, Joe Biden and a Climate Change Activist.
All this and more!
Episode 199 – It’s A Lot With Abbie Chatfield – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Jess is on the show!
She hates Abbie Chatfield too.
We talk about Kieran’s study.
And Turch talks about his boomer parents.
All this and more!
Episode - 198 - Kieran Cleans Concrete- We Only Do One Take Podcast
This week Kieran becomes an honorary Italian. Turch rants about his family and we review another episode of Abbie Chatfield's podcast.
Episode 197 – What Is A Woman – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch tells us a story about his dad.
Kieran finally likes a politician.
And the boys try and define the word woman.
All this and more!
Episode 196 – It’s A Lot – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran tells us about seeing Dead City Ruins and KISS
Turch hates the IRS
And we review the Abbie Chatfield podcast It’s a Lot
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on:
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Episode 195 – Chorizos In Space – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran tells us about a flying chorizo.
Turch rants about everything music.
And the boys listen to Ghost.
All this and more!
Episode 194 – Turch Is Pregnant – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch is having a baby boy.
Kieran loves turtles.
And special hand signals will get people hurt.
All this and more!
Episode 193 – KFC Are Illuminati – We Only Do One Take Podcast
We listen to a new intro song for the podcast.
Kieran tells us how spacemen have sex.
And Turch shows us the KFC Conspiracy Theory debate videos.
All this and more!
Episode 192 - Moving House – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran helps his dad move house.
Turch can't get a doctors appointment.
And the boys hate QR codes as menus.
All this and more!
Episode 191 – Kieran’s Joke Corner Part 1 – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran tells a joke.
Episode 190 – Beanie Babies – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran learns what vabbing is.
Turch is excited for the 2022 World Cup
And Beanie Babies are back in a different form, NTFs.
All this and more!
Episode 189 – EOFY – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran believes he is living in a simulation.
Turch doesn’t understand the US Supreme Court.
And the boys learn they are fatphobic
Episode 188 – Comedy Cruises – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran gets an email from his dad.
Turch’s mum sets the bar too high.
And more Fat Lip podcast.
Episode 187 – Making Salami – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch makes salami with his family.
Kieran learsn about a McGangbang.
And we die super deep into the Fat Lip Podcast.
Episode 186 – The Fat Person Spectrum – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch is angry about universally accepted price gauging, the whiskey pedo joke and selling stuff online.
Kieran reviews the new Top Gun film without mentioning the leg room.
And the boys learn about the Fat Spectrum on The Fat Lip podcast.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on:
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• iTunes- https://podcasts.apple.com/podcast/id1332596345?ct=podlink&mt=2&app=podcast&ls=1
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Ep 184 - The 3am Kebab - We Only Do One Take Podcast
The long awaited episode 184 is a cracker! The council wants to ban the 3am kebab! Microplastics are in our bodies and Canada makes the moon illegal!
Episode 185 – Flying While Fat – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch and Kieran vote to save Australia.
Bathroom stall doors that open inwards.
A film review.
And watching fat women complain about travel.
All this and more!
Ep 183 - I, for one, welcome our new twitter lord
Turch admits he is not tall, a women falls in a toilet and Kieran wants Turch’s mum to iron his clothes!
Episode 182 - Who has the biggest penis? - We Only Do One Take Podcast
In this week’s episode, Kieran and Turch find out who has the biggest penis! The art world is a scam, and one of our listeners is very disappointed with Kieran.
Episode 181 – An Interview With Bangz – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Holy crap we have international rapper, app developer and Australian icon, Your Boi Bangz on the show!
We talk about his music, his new app and all the fun stuff that has happened to him over his 12+ year career!
Check him out at http://chickichick.com/
Episode 180 – Flying High – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran is back flying, but forgot how to do it.
Turch hates the Grammys
And bad similes
All this and more on this week’s episode!
Episode 179 – Getting Slapped – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Dan from AMR Barre Talk is on the show!
Turch talks about black on black violence
Kieran wears kid’s jeans
And Dan loves his local facebook group.
All this and more!
Episode 178 – International Woman’s Month Feat. Bad Poets Society– We Only Do One Take Podcast
This week we have Teresa from Bad Poets Society on the show!
Teresa brings in some terrible lyrics.
Kieran informs us that the number of chips in the bag is being reduced
And Turch is angry at the Socceroos.
Check out Bad Poets Society at @BadPoetsPod on Twitter
Episode 177 – The Biggest Problem In The Universe – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch is angry at everything
Kieran can’t get a lift to the airport.
And we review The Biggest problem in the Universe Podcast.
Episode 176 – Raise Some Kaine – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch is angry at the cost of funerals and boomer traditions.
Kieran takes a critical race theory test.
And some shitty music from around the world.
Episode 175 – Turch Got Married, Kieran Got COVID – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch got married, in November in secret. The story gets told.
Kieran gets COVID.
Plus a story about the holocaust.
All this and more!
Episode 174 – Guilty By Association– We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch thinks Neil Young is retarded.
The r/antiwork movement makes Kieran laugh.
And the Great Honkening.
Episode 173 – Writing Jokes – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch and Kieran write jokes.
Our podcast is better than Meghan and Harry’s.
Kieran can’t find parking.
All this and more.
Episode 172 – Feminism A Government Psyop – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran organises the best buck’s night, but strippers are missing tits.
Turch is angry at Covid because it is destroying the environment.
And we uncover a government psyop.
All this and more.
Episode 171 – Post New Year’s Nap – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Holy crap we are back fully of Christmas food, stories and in need of a nap.
Pumped for a new year of podcasts.
Episode 170 - The Xmas Special - We Only Do One Take Podcast
The Xmas Special is proudly brought to you by Kieran spilling a beer and tearing his pants!
Episode 169 – The Music Special – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Something we have never done; a music special!
This week we have our long-time friend, the Librarian, on the show.
Turch hates modern film scores.
And the Librarian defends terrible albums by David Bowie, Rage Against the Machine and Weezer.
And Kieran is both country and western.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on:
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Episode 168 - We Got Banned Again - We Only Do One Take Podcast
In this weeks episode, we rant about products with no charging unit and
delivery people. Turch educates Kieran about itakian culture and porn star Siri is angry people don't care about the person behind the porn star.
Episode 167 – How To Protest – We Only Do One Take Podcast
This week’s special guest, Tim (moth2flame on instagram) is an artist and freedom fighter. He is here to tell us about his experience in the latest Melbourne protests.
Plus Turch hates Netflix again.
And Kieran brings in stupid news.
All this and more!
Episode 166 – Bad Ads – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Terrible ads all around.
And stupid news.
Episode 165 – Stevie Wonder Isn’t Blind– We Only Do One Take Podcast
This month we are going through the worst conspiracy theories! Stevie Wonder can see, Disney is covering up Walt being frozen and Turch stumbles across The Finders
Kieran is the news babe for the show.
All this and more.
Episode 164 – Conspiracy Theories And Porn Stats – We Only Do One Take Podcast
This month we are going through the worst conspiracy theories! This week, where did the phrase conspiracy theory come from? Is that a conspiracy?
Kieran takes us through the porn hub stats.
And Turch hates web based applications.
Episode 163 – Helen Keller, A Fraud – We Only Do One Take Podcast
This month we are going through the worst conspiracy theories! This week, Helen Keller, it was all faked.
Kieran has a special surprise for the show.
All this and more!
Episode 162 – Vegan Burgers – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch complains about Vegans appropriating carnivore words.
Kieran learns to shower.
And the boys listen to the Libs of TikTok.
All this and more!
Episode 161 – Earthquaked – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Victoria suffers through an earthquake.
Dan from Barre Talk is the show.
Turch gets a podcast position upgrade
We listen to COVID19 vaccine songs.
Plus an alcohol review!
All this and more!
Episode 160 – Kieran Listens To Patrick Michael – We Only Do One Take Podcast
The pandemic has made people have no sense of humour.
Kieran hates people on the sidewalk.
And the boys watch a Patrick Michael comedy special.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on:
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Episode 159 – A Foot Fetish Show – We Only Do One Take Podcast
A man glues his penis shut.
Kieran gets a hard on for fresh cut grass.
And we listen to a foot fetish podcast.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on:
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Episode 158 – Bad Comedy– We Only Do One Take Podcast
We listen to a bad comedy special.
Kieran farts in his sleep.
And Turch hates nurses complaining about work.
All this and more!
Episode 157 – State Enforced Lockdown– We Only Do One Take Podcast
The Taliban are back baby!
The boys are back in lockdown.
Turch hates Netflix.
All this and more!
Episode 156 – Having A Stroke – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch rants about real estate agents. Kieran talks about a guy getting a stroke while having a stroke and the buys talk about weighing steaks.
Plus Kieran learns about Chris Chan.
All this and more!
Episode 155 – The BIG SALAD – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran takes credit for a gift, Turch hates another phrase and an influencer is selling digital love.
All this and more!
Episode 154 – Locked Down Again – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Badly cut pizza, Mexican grapes, fruit makers, bare-bottomed monkey costume with mock genitalia encourage kids to read more books, vaccines giving girls bigger tits and sugar almonds.
All this and more from lockdown 5.0!
Episode 153 – Shirts – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran hates clothes shopping.
Turch’s mum doesn’t understand photos
And a polyamorous couple doesn’t want to give their children a gender.
Make sure you follow us on:
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Episode 152 – An Evening With Jake Savich – We Only Do One Take Podcast
On this special episode, Turch interview Jake Savich, the founder of Guitar of Consciousness.
Always amazing to have another musician on the show!
Check him out here:
https://www.guitarofconsciousness.com/
https://www.facebook.com/JakeSavichMusic/
https://www.instagram.com/jakesavich/?hl=en
https://twitter.com/JakeSavich
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCIm5W5H13bOA31aVMgWu_0A
Make sure you follow us on:
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Episode 151 – On The Rebound– We Only Do One Take Podcast
We have Dan from Barre Talk (Australian Musicians Radio) in studio!
Kieran rants a lot.
Dan tells us about The WHO stopping women drinking.
And Turch shows everyone Dennis Rodman’s podcast.
All this and more!
Episode 149 - Viper
This episode is well worth the wait! Kieran rants about birthday parties and Turch is skeptical about companies celebrating pride month. Plus we listen to one of the best rapper #viper
Episode 150 – The 150th Episode – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch rants about having an itchy foot, dubbed films and the phase ‘hasn’t aged well’
Kieran reads the news.
And the boys review their new podcast
Episode 148 – In Search Of Bigfoot – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran makes a bet.
Turch helps Kieran’s financial situation
And lots of talk on nothing
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on:
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• Twitter - @WeOnlyDo
Episode 147 – Talking To An Archangel – We Only Do One Take Podcast
On this interview episode (that Kieran said to put out) Turch interviews William Frank Lamar, a self-described Archangel who both God and Jesus have spoken to and done miracles for. Also, the Secret Telepathic Police have invaded his brain. Turch needed to find out more.
Follow William at @red240zeeeguy
Episode 146 – The Long Con – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch’s long joke finally pays off
Sasha Baron Cohan is the worst.
A man accidently loses both legs.
And more conspiracy theories.
All this and more!
Episode 145 – The Witches – We Only Do One Take Podcast
More anger. Kieran tried to make holy water.
India is a super power by drinking cow pee and covering themselves in cow poo.
And the Podcast Consultants listen to a show about witches. Get in that circle
All this and more!
Episode 144 – The Ministry – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Another loud episode. Meeting agendas, Myki cards and birthday cards set the boys off.
Harry Potter fans hate Harry Potter and California release prisons to make prisons safer.
And the Podcast Consultants listen to a Christian show.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on:
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• Fa
Episode 143 – Dissociative Identity Disorder Awareness – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Miss the Podcast Consultants? So did we. This week we look into the Brain Buddies Podcast and we dissociate like crazy.
Rants; always. Super glue and overhanging trees set Turch off.
All this and more!
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Episode 142 – The Fun Run – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran is going to doing some fun runs: after a buck’s night and a wedding.
Turch hates going into the office
Biden is taking our meat.
And shitty podcast ideas.
Make sure you follow us on:
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Conspiracy Theory Ep6 - Spirit Science The Nibiru Movie Part 2 - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Another conspiracy theory show! Make sure you follow us on YouTube for the next one
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• Twitter - @WeOnlyDoOneTake
• YouTube - http
Episode 141 – Missing Garden Gnomes – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 141 – Missing Garden Gnomes – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Hate dip lids, 4pm meeting, shitty logistics and clip shows of TV shows? Us too.
The world is running out of garden gnomes and Turch proves he is actually black (and so is his dog).
Plus ore 2real2nice.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on:
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Conspiracy Theory Episode 4 - Spirit Science The Nibiru Movie - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Our review of the Nibiru film from Spirit Science featuring TRraj!
Conspiracy Theory Episode 5 - Hidden Human History Movie pt2 - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Part 2 of the review of the Spirit Science Hidden Human History Movie
Episode 140 – Getting Cancelled – We Only Do One Take Podcast
A video of ours has been banned on YouTube! Insane!
Plus rants about the pop over.
Kieran now hates the cinema but highly rates his cinema experience with Turch.
Sheet music is now bad somehow and the boys listen to Harry and Meghan’s long running podcast.
All this and more!
Episode 139 – A Celebration Of Womanhood And Diversity – We Only Do One Take Podcast
We have been working hard on this to make it the funniest April Fools show ever!
Turch and Kieran are back in the studio which means its rants time! Stupid dog owners, heavy mattresses and people who ask to help when you are about to finish a task.
The news is strange this week. Meatloaf’s new dating show, sneaking into Seaworld and biological male wins a female beauty contest.
Plus special dog guests Dweezil and Arthur.
All this and more on this week’s show!
Make sure you follow us on:
• SoundC
Episode 138 – Pre - Emptive Rants – We Only Do One Take Podcast
More rants? Yes please
After lots of conspiracy theories, we are back in the studio ready to take about all the stupid news.
Plus, more 2real2nice podcast.
Thanks Underdog Guitars and Shitty Song of the Week!
https://reverb.com/au/shop/underdogguitars
https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/shitty-song-of-the-week/id1493664369
Conspiracy Theory Episode 3 - Spirit Science Hidden Human History - We Only Do One Take Podcast
We look over the Spirit Science Hidden Human History Movie. It's amazing
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Conspiracy Theory Episode 2 - The Fall Of The Cabal Parts 3 And 4 - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Part 2 of our review of the Fall of the Cabal. Oh boy...
Make sure you follow us on YouTube
www.youtube.com/watch?v=rQ_5OzElt…yDoOneTakePodcast
Conspiracy Theory Episode 1 - The Fall Of The Cabal Parts 1 And 2 - We Only Do One Take Podcast
We review the Fall of the Cabal. Oh boy...
Make sure you follow us on YouTube
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rQ_5OzEltVs&t=1s&ab_channel=WeOnlyDoOneTakePodcast
Episode 137 – Getting’ 2Real And 2nice – We Only Do One Take Podcast
And we are back after talking to the flat earther.
Rants galore: Bad drivers, companies not returning your call, the word adulating and bad journalism.
Plus, chimps getting vaccines, how to be an ally to Sex Works and the Podcast consultants are back.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on:
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Episode 136 - A Discussion With A Flat Earther - We Only Do One Take Podcast
This was streamed on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9jCRO4RwDMA&t=1148s&ab_channel=WeOnlyDoOneTakePodcast
Episode 135: Lockdown 3.0
Episode 135: Lockdown 3.0 - With a Vengeance.
Episode 134 – A Podcast For Kids– We Only Do One Take Podcast
Yelling at long shirt tags, introducing yourself at training sessions, and no phone cables.
New about the Gorilla Glue Girl, porn hub stats during the Superbowl and porn in the Kath and Kim house.
Plus we look at the Slacker’s Day Off podcast in our Podcast Consultant segment.
Episode 133 – Getting Slurry – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Yelling about the post office, news about condoms and the Podcast Consultants have returned!
Episode 132 – Jamming With The Grand Wazoo – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Holy crap we have The Grand Wazoo on our show!
Check him out in all his goodness:
Bandcamp The Grand Wazoo's Christmas Kalli-Kazoo | The Grand Wazoo (bandcamp.com)
Spotify Spotify – The Grand Wazoo's Christmas Kalli Kazoo (Acts 1 and 2) Spotify – The Grand Wazoo's Christmas Kalli Kazoo (Acts 3 and 4)
Apple Music The Grand Wazoo's Christmas Kalli Kazoo (Acts 1 And 2) by The Grand Wazoo on Apple Music The Grand Wazoo's Christmas Kalli Kazoo (Acts 3 And 4) by The Grand Wazoo on Apple Music
Episode 131 – The Podcast Consultants – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Why are people shit at their job, boxes of crap from your parents that you don’t want and getting your asshole tested for Covid.
Plus we look at a business podcast on a new segment called The Podcast Consultants.
All this and more on this week’s episode of the show.
Episode 130 – Slippery Slope – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch and Kieran get angry at cinemas, laptop headphone jacks and cleaners.
A quick whip around from news from around the world.
And the worst subject matter for a podcast ever.
Plus a round of Winners Drink.
All this and more!
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Episode 129 – The Return – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Welcome back to the studio in 2021. It’s a rant-filled episode!
From stupid photos, top bad water bottles, foam soaps to bad laws; it has it all.
An update from Phillip Island, including the sauce competition.
Our appearance on Shitty Song of the Week, AMR and on the Grand Wazoo Dick Show Christmas album.
And of course some stupid news.
All this and more!
Epsiode 128
We watched Johnson Family Dinner for Christmas. It was a bad idea
Watch us watch it here:
https://youtu.be/xYrcfQBOlW8
Christmas Special #1 2020
Grab your copy of Home Alone 2 (the best Home Alone Movie) and listen to Kieran and Turch provide the running commentary.
Episode 126 – Kieran Pees On The Floor – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Back in the studio, we rant a lot.
And Kieran pees on Turch’s floor.
And we rank in Kenya.
All this and more in this week’s episode!
Make sure you follow us on:
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Episode 125 – Crime, Murder And Mystery – We Only Do One Take Podcast
The boys are at their separate homes because they want to socially distance themselves from each other.
Rants about etiquette, and news about porn and scientific studies about women.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on:
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Episode 124 – Turch's Wedding Plans – We Only Do One Take Podcast
EP 124
Episode 123 – On The Casting Couch – We Only Do One Take Podcast
The boys are live and in the same room.And Blain joins us.
Lots of rants, go no-were stories and even some stupid news.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on:
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Episode 122 – Wanktober Featuring Big - E And Kebmo Slice – We Only Do One Take Podcast
The whole gang is live and we roast the shit out of the Pornhub podcast.
Plus rants, drinking and stupid news.
Get pumped.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on:
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Episode 121 – Wanktober Featuring Dan From Barre Talk Podcast – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Dan from Barre Talk is on the show!
Plus we review Lelu Love’s podcast!
Alcohol reviews!
And rants about nothing.
All this and more!
Check out Dan here:
https://www.australianmusiciansradio.com/barre-talk
Make sure you follow us on:
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Episode 120 – Wanktober Featuring Dahn The Mahn! - We Only Do One Take Podcast
In this week’s Wanktober fest, we take on Bridgette B’s podcast ReadySexChat with our good friend Dahn the Mahn!
Make sure you follow us on:
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• Twitter - @WeO
Episode 119 – Wanktober Feat Jason From Mixed Media Forest Podcast – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Holy crap, Jason from Mixed Media is on the show to kick off our Wanktober episodes!
What is Wanktober? Well since the last time we reviewed a porn stars podcast and made the porn star angry, we decided to look at a bunch more!
Jason is here to give his professional media review!
Rants around the table too, plus Kieran tells us the news of the week.
All this and more on this week’s show!
Make sure you follow us on:
• SoundCloud - https://soundcloud.com/weonlydoonetakepodcast
• iTunes- https://po
Episode 118 - Live Again - We Only Do One Take Podcast
This is the worst episode of the show yet
Rants, foot fetishes and taxes.
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Episode 117 - Live With Shitty Song Of The Week – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 117 – Live with Shitty Song of the Week – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Shitty Song of the Week are here live with us!
But they are late… so while we wait we take about the porn star that hates us and stickers on fruit.
Then the song battle begins; Tom Morello vs Stevie Ray Vaughan. Who is worse?
All this and more on this week’s show!
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• iTunes- https://podcasts.apple.com/podcast/id1332596345?ct=podlink
Episode 116 – Eating Shit – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 116 – Eating Shit – We Only Do One Take Podcast
On a cold Monday night, the Turch rants about the double standards of eating Nutella out of the jar and how Kieran judges his relationship with Jess.
A woman gives a blowjob to a homeless man while urinating, Kieran sells the idea to eat other people’s shit and how to save up to buy a house.
Kieran raps WAP and Trump Watch returns.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on:
• SoundCloud - https://soundcloud.com/weonlydoonetakepodcast
•
Episode 115 – Pint Glasses – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Another live episode!
This week the boys talk about bad emails and having no access to water.
Kieran brings in cases of serial poopers and poop bandits.
Turch talks about a mother of a dead transgender woman who wants to keep her sperm.
And with TikTok being sold, Kieran shows us how to floss.
All this and more!
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• Inst
Episode 114 – Live – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 114 – Live – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Ladies and gentlemen, the boys are live on Youtube now!
Incredible.
Thank you Turch.
With lockdown happening Turch rants about his fiancé, lack of chip clips and not coving food properly.
Kieran tells us about science.
All this and more on this week’s episode!
Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook, Spotify and Twitter!
If you would like to send a death threat, hate mail or a rant, record it on your phone and email it t
Episode 113 – Stupid Units Of Measurement – We Only Do One Take Podcast
The boys are back in lockdown, so let’s complain about leaving the house.
Turch tried to get things certified and succeeds with great strain. Plus he yells about stupid units of measurement.
Kieran and Turch go into the Epstein conspiracy some more.
And Kieran teaches Turch a lesson.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook, Spotify and Twitter!
If you would like to send a death threat, hate mail or a rant, record it on your phone and email it to us a
Episode 109 - Fireside Chat with Kieran and Niall
EP 109 - Fireside Chat
Turch is away this week, but that is okay, Niall has joined Kieran for a fireside chat. Enjoy!
Episode 112 - The Real Fake Zappa - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Ladies and gentlemen, the Real Fake Zappa is on the show!
On this week’s episode Turch feels like the guest on the Fake Zappa show!
Fake and Turch go over Fake’s experience at straight camps, his experience with the left and dealing with mental health.
Plus an in-depth look at his campaign and an even closer discussion of dicks.
Plus some musical interlude by Fake on banjo! And a song exclusive!
Check out Fake Zappa here:
https://fakezappa.com/
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on Soun
Episode 111 - Drive Thru Strip Club - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran and Turch are back! This week we talk about all things from phones in the toilet to drive through strip clubs. Enjoy!
Episode 110 – Porncast – We Only Do One Take Podcast
On this week’s episode returning guest Damien is on the show and is our acting CEO! Kieran watch out.
Turch rants about women and buying shitty quality products, and Damien tells us his hatred of bands that need to quit.
Turch and Damien try to avoid talking about the Corona Virus, and instead take on the podcast After Adult, featuring porn actress Siri.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook, Spotify and Twitter!
If you would like to send a death t
Episode 108 – Roasting Kieran – We Only Do One Take Podcast
With Kieran fucking up the audio of the last episode, this week we have Jess on as a co-host!
Finally a female perspective.
Turch rants about applying for jobs, while Jess complains Turch is more popular with children.
Turch tells the story why the episodes have been delayed, and jess gets an education about the goings on with Pornhub.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook, Spotify and Twitter!
If you would like to send a death threat, hate mail or
Episode 107 – Learning To Be A Furry With Cadre – We Only Do One Take Podcast
On this week’s very special episode we have the opportunity to talk to Cadre. Cadre is an Australian furry, specifically a fox furry.
Cadre lets us dive into the world of the Australian furry from his perspective; how he got into being a furry, what the furry community is like in Australia and what it feels like to wear a fur suit.
Plus he answers all the stupid questions we had; and even tells us how expensive it is to clean a fur-suit.
And Kieran interrupts the show by getting a milkshake.
All
Episode 106 – State Funded Gloryholes – We Only Do One Take Podcast
On this week’s episode we have Kembo from the Karaok Big-E podcast and the Sixer Podcast.
Lots of rants this week, from Cancel Culture, to sharing bathrooms to having unsatisfying shits.
Plus we go into the history of Kembo.
Plus all the news you need to know including state funded glory holes and the greatest lawsuit ever.
All this and more!
Check out Kembo’s podcasts here:
https://karaokbige.com/
https://www.facebook.com/thesixerpodcast
Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram,
Episode 105- Red Flag Podcast Review Part 1- We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 105 – Red Flag Podcast Review Part 1 – We Only Do One Take Podcast
On this week’s episode we look at the weekly revolutionary socialist podcast made in Melbourne called Red Flag Podcast.
Holy crap: we thought our show was a shit-show. This is off the chart.
This is part 1 of our review.
Red Flag podcast, if you are unhappy with that we have said, we would love you to come onto our show and chat to us about it.
Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook, Spotify an
Episode 104 - "She ate a dozen penises"
This has to be one of our best episodes to date! You'll be glad you listened to it! And yes, she did eat a dozen penises.
Episode 103 – Talkin’ Flat Earth – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 103 – Talkin’ Flat Earth – We Only Do One Take Podcast
On this week’s eisopde we have Amogh from the Frat Earth Research Podcast.
We go through everything flat earth and more!
Check out Amogh on the Flat Earth Research Podcast:
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/flat-earth-research/id1385303508
Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook, Spotify and Twitter!
If you would like to send a death threat, hate mail or a rant, record it on your phone and email it to u
Episode 102 – An OnlyFans But For Dogs – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 102 – An OnlyFans but for dogs – We Only Do One Take Podcast
After being sick we are back!
And Blain is in the studio too!
Rants about Uber Eats and doctors all around.
More stories about sex dolls.
And the boys debate the value of OnlyFans.
And Kieran gives us a whip around in world news.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook, Spotify and Twitter!
If you would like to send a death threat, hate mail or a rant, record it on your phone and em
Episode 101 – Bad Teachers And Pandering To Women – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 101 – Bad Teachers and Pandering to Women – We Only Do One Take Podcast
A huge 101st episode here!
This week we have Jess back on the show.
The group talk about ads that have nothing to do with the product, and how they pander to women. Looking at you Hasbro.
Kieran delays the Patreon, and does a world tour of news around the world.
And Jess tells us about reality TV.
We make an appearance on Hack the Movies and talk about shitty teachers.
And we all hate boomer humour, except for Kieran
Episode 100 – Happy Birthday Kieran – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Its our 100th episode and Kierans birthday!
Thanks to Alice, Karaobe Big-E (Big-E and Kebmo), Dhan the Man, Jess Kieran’s family, Turch’s family, Stefan Filipp, Traj, Tyler, The Watsonia Bugle, Niall and Emkew for all your support this episode!
Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook, Spotify and Twitter!
If you would like to send a death threat, hate mail or a rant, record it on your phone and email it to us at weonlydoonetakepodcast@gmail.com
And this can help: https
Episode 99 - A Review Of Episode 98 - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 99 – A Review of Episode 99– We Only Do One Take Podcast
Our episode with Rob left a lot of questions, so we tried to answer them here.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook, Spotify and Twitter!
If you would like to send a death threat, hate mail or a rant, record it on your phone and email it to us at weonlydoonetakepodcast@gmail.com
And this can help: https://vocaroo.com/ if you would like to send us a rant!
Episode 98 - Conspiracy Talk With With Rob Roselli - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 98 – Conspiracy Talk With With Rob Roselli– We Only Do One Take Podcast
On this episode of the show we welcome special guest Rob Roselli!
We get his insider knowledge of all conspiracy theories.
Incredible stuff.
Check out Rob here:
https://soundcloud.com/totalmedianetwork
Www.boxofsunglasses.com
http://vipinternetradio.com/podcast/rob-roselli-show/
@robroselli on twitter
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook, Spotify and Twitter!
If you wo
Episode 97 - Rocket Man!
The boys are in quarantine this week... but that doesn't stop them! This week, we take a closer look at PornHub's stats during lockdown! Turch has been kicked off Instagram and do we have a new Darwin award?
The Rant - Episode 96
Episode 96 - Turch and Kieran are back in the studio. No COVID-10 talk here. There are a lot of rants!
Episode 95 – Is This A Crossover Episode – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 95 – Is this a Crossover Episode? – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Welcome back to the show, and welcome temporary CEO, Big E from Karaok Big-E!
Coronavirus, USA vs Australia is on! Who is more in lockdown more? (The answer may surprise you!)
Kieran rants about learner drivers in Australia, and Big-E brings in a CEO level rant, people not taking the Coronavirus seriously.
More importantly, the beeping sound of the podcast occurred.
We play Play That Tune and find out how Rockerfella Street
Episode 94 – Quarantined Sing Along – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 94 – Quarantined Sing Along – We Only Do One Take Podcast
The boys are coronavirus free and in the studio to try and avoid taking about coronavirus as much as possible. It’s a story time episode!
More rants about coronavirus stuff.
Harvey Weinstein update.
And a challenge is set.
Plus a huge sing-a-long. Request a song for next time!
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook, Spotify and Twitter!
If you would like to send a death threat, hate m
Episode 93 – Working From Home – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 93 – Working from Home – We Only Do One Take Podcast
The boys are coronavirus free and in the studio to try and avoid taking about coronavirus as much as possible. It’s a story time episode!
Turch rants about changing bed sheets. Suddenly they have an incredible, multimillion dollar idea to solve problems.
A sad tale about Uber eats.
And the troubles of working from home.
Kieran wakes himself up with a fart.
ISIS are scared of the corona virus.
Turch had to sit to pee.
All this and more!
Episode 92 – Bad Parking – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 92 – Bad Parking – We Only Do One Take Podcast
After the disaster of a ‘bonus episode’ Turch is back on the show to ensure that it is both high energy and on track.
The boys celebrate 10,000 listens on SoundCloud. Very exciting times!
Turch comes flying in with a rant about parallel parking.
And the boys ensure they cover all the news this week including horse semen, corona virus, Bill Clinton and the Village People.
And Dweezil pays the show a visit.
All this and more!
Make sure you fol
The Best Show Ever
Turch is away this week...so Niall has come back to the studio.
This is most likely the best show that has ever been recorded!!!
Enjoy this special episode.
Episode 91 – Nothin’ But Star Wars – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Back in studio are two of our favourite guests, Cienan (aka Cee Jay and the Cosplay) and Heidi (aka the award winning Heidzdeecosplay). They are back in the studio, and they are engaged!
Kieran rants about going to a baptism, and how he let himself down.
Turch rants about rewards points, and uncovers another scam.
But more importantly, the newly engaged couple and Turch complain about people asking about their upcoming weddings.
Which leads into the story of how Cienan proposed.
Like last episod
Episode 90 – Getting Healthy – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 90 – Getting Healthy – We Only Do One Take Podcast
This week the boys have a very special guest: blogger, learner and naturopath Stefan Filippo from https://www.stefanfilippohealth.com/.
They go in deed, learning all about how Stefan got into naturopathy, how he practises and in talk about topics including detoxing, mindful eating and some principles to help keep you healthy.
Kieran rants about
Turch talks about turtle soup and racists coronavirus signs.
All this and more!
Check out Stef
Episode 89 – Turch Ruins The Show– We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 89 – Turch Ruins the Show– We Only Do One Take Podcast
Back in the studio and the episode starts off strong.
Rants about teachers, Spotify not having everything you want, not being able to find Bugs Bunny cartoons and people not flushing the toilet.
A man gets arrested for calling his mate while riding on a horse.
And then Turch ruins the episode with stuff about paedophiles, a woman saying the n word and information about Vermin Supreme.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on Sou
Episode 88 – Sexy Clams– We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 88 – Sexy Clams– We Only Do One Take Podcast
It’s hot and sweaty and the boys are Skyping in for convenience.
Turch rants about body hair, in particular ass hair. Why do we have it, why do we need it and why are we not talking about it during sex ed?
We discuss the most hilarious lawsuit of this year.
Kieran tells us how to bake in space, and amazing this has nothing to do with weed.
Turch explains jokes.
Kieran orders milk during the impeachment.
And a man fucks a clam.
All this and mor
Tequila - As played on Karaoke Big-E - We Only Do One Take Podcast
This was played on Karaok Big-E and now we share it with you all.
Episode 87 – Sex Robots Singing Karaoke – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 87 – Sex Robots Singing Karaoke – We Only Do One Take Podcast
The boys are back in the studio after the most insane interview we have ever done.
An early recording session; just before they go to see Dead City Ruins in Northcote, the boys are all over the place again.
Turch rants about toothpaste and the Billboard chart of rock songs of the decade and gives you a bunch of cool music to listen to.
Kieran brings sex robots back onto the show, and people continue to steal our ideas.
And we
Episode 86 - Diaper Time - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 86 – Diaper Time – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Welcome to the first proper episode of the New Year and by do we start with something amazing.
On this week’s episode we interview a gentleman named Tyler who is a part of the Adult Baby Diaper Lover community.
Turch and Kieran get to dive into the world of ABDL with Tyler, go into his story and ask all the questions they have.
Super fascinating stuff!
Check out Tyler and Tyler’s work below:
- YouTube.com/saguaroproductions
- Twitter is @sag
Episode 85 - Happy New Year Same As The Old - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 85 – Happy New Year Same as the Old – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Happy New Year to all!
Welcome to the worst show of the year.
It’s only up from here.
Turch has a new years resolution, Kieran tells a story and the boys are hungry.
All this and more!
Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook, Spotify and Twitter!
If you would like to send a death threat, hate mail or a rant, record it on your phone and email it to us at weonlydoonetakepodcast@gmail.com
And this c
Episode 84 - Xmas Special
Episode 84 - Xmas Special by We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 83 – Our Weird Relationship – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 83 – Our Weird Relationship – We Only Do One Take Podcast
The boys are back are very much in the season of obligation and the struggle is real.
Turch is sick, and Kieran tells us about his bus experience.
The boys dissect a polyamorous relationship where a woman has 4 partners, and is having a baby with one.
Turch tells us about climate change from the past.
And Kieran tells us his views on Turch’s time on Karaok Big E for their 100th episode!
All this and more in this week’s episode!
Ma
Episode 82 – Welcome To Our Ted Talk – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 82 – Welcome to our Ted Talk – We Only Do One Take Podcast
The boys are back, and are very much ready for the season of obligation.
In this week’s episode the boys discuss the Fat Acceptance movement, and Turch then bring sin a Ted ex Talk from a Fat Acceptance Movement advocate. Kieran psychoanalyses her, and a determination is made.
Kieran tells us about cows wearing VR headsets, which is basically the plot of Matrix.
And Turch tells us about the time he was on Karaok Big E for their 1
Episode 81 – Happy Birthday Turch – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 81 – Happy Birthday Turch – We Only Do One Take Podcast
A very special birthday episode this week: it’s Turch’s birthday.
Turch rants about getting older and stupid injuries, while Kieran tells us how he injured his ankle.
A chat about the LGBTQ community and their perception to the American public brings on many a jokes about a party.
Kieran invites us to go to the vagina museum.
Turch tells us how he saw a man pee on the train.
And Kieran can’t say his most famous saying.
All this and
Episode 80 – WODOT Reviews Episode Seven – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 80 – WODOT Reviews Episode Seven – We Only Do One Take Podcast
We review our own episode, WATP style!
In this episode we review episode 7 of our own podcast. To help us with the review we have Jess on the show!
Heaps of fun.
Goddamn we suck.
Check us out on YouTube! More videos from the best bits of the show coming!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aSFyzgJFwtE
Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook, Spotify and Twitter!
If you would like to send a death threat,
Episode 79 - Podcast War!
Annnndddd.....itsss out!
Episode 79! The Podcast War continues! We also discuss what is the best use of nail clippings and we find a floating hotel in North Korea.
Episode 78 – KARAOKE TIME - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 78 – KARAOKE TIME - We Only Do One Take Podcast
In this episode, we have special; guest Dr Ayounb!
Turch rants about shopping trolleys.
Kieran tells us about the upgrade in the USA Defence Force. Still ahead of the NBN in Australia.
Ayoub tells us about a new study involving chickens and how it’s important to be good looking.
Turch brings in clips from the Stuttering John Show in support of our good friends and Who Are These Podcast, and the boys review Turch’s new favourite podcast.
And
Episode 77 – My Time At The Strippers With Dahn The Mahn - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Back in the studio we have professional stand-up comedian Dahn the Mahn!! Dahn has been working the circuits here in Melbourne for the last two years. Recently he has been on stage with a bunch of cool Australian comedians and is even hosting a bunch of events around Melbourne.
Check out his latest show at the COMEDY ON HIGH at Wesley Ann Tickets here;
https://www.facebook.com/events/262178111169874/
And a new challenge is born, stand-up comedy based.
Turch has it in for Maccas Monopoly. Kieran
Episode 76 – How To Review A Brothel – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 76 – How to Review a Brothel – We Only Do One Take Podcast
A very odd episode this one.
The boys have come out a drunken stupor from the AFL Grand Final to bring you this episode.
In this episode the boys rant about the people behind the register, and the people behind you in line.
Kieran tells us how he nearly fought a guy over a car spot and tells us the debacle over Turch’s BBQ. Mind you he nearly killed everyone with undercooked food.
Kieran tells us a story about a man who kept his
Episode 75
Episode 75 - Poo Patrol
It's a real shit show this week!
We discuss toilet etiquette and taking a poo at work!
Episode 74 - How To Get A Hot Date - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 74 – How to Get a Hot Date – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Its episode 74, and we want to help all the men find hot chicks to date.
Na not really. Ewe go one to find out who women want top marry these days, and how men being poor is the problem.
Kieran tells us the tale of bad communication, penetration and the law.
Turch brings in more cool things up for sale in his area.
Kieran is on the keto diet, and learns how to go back in time! Incredible! He also talks about the difference between
Episode 73 – Turch Fan Boys Over Maximum Bob – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 73 – Turch fan boys over Maximum Bob – We Only Do One Take Podcast
HOLY CRAP! MAXIMUM BOB IS ON THE SHOW!
In a dream come true for Turch, get gets to talk with Maximum Bob from the Stockyard Skinners!
Bob tells the stories of his interactions with Buckethead, Mr. Bungle, System of a Down, Praxis and a whole bunch more.
Please we get to talk about his new music project, the Stockyard Skinners!
Links to all Bob’s good stuff below. Make sure you follow him!
https://stockyardskinners.com/
ht
Episode 72 – Teachers Suck – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 72 –Teachers Suck – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Its episode 72, we all of a sudden we hate Teachers.
Kieran is on the keto diet, and that has caused him to be extra ranty today. He start off with wiping poo off his face, and then gets on to talking up using baby wipes to wipe his ass. Somehow if becomes a real shit show.
Kieran doubles up on the rants and rants about ride sharing apps; the lack of water bottles, lack of mints and b-o.
Then Turch rants about Teachers. With 10% of teacher
Episode 71 - Fart Tracker 3000
In this weeks episode...
Special guest Niall joins us and rants about twins! Turch rants about universal music records being burned in a fire AND Kieran discusses an app that can track your FARTS!!
We also add are two cents to the Jeffery Epstein scandal.
Episode 70 - WODOT Reviews Episode 3 - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 70 – WODOT Reviews Episode Three – We Only Do One Take Podcast
We review our own episode, WATP style!
Heaps of fun.
Goddamn we suck.
Check us out on YouTube! More videos from the best bits of the show coming!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aSFyzgJFwtE
Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook, Spotify and Twitter!
If you would like to send a death threat, hate mail or a rant, record it on your phone and email it to us at weonlydoonetakepodcast@gmail.com
And this
Episode 69 – Clapping Dem Trans Alien Cheeks – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 69 – Clapping Dem Trans Alien Cheeks – We Only Do One Take Podcast
We promised a sexy 69th episode, and the boys are in the studio for the least sexy episode ever.
Turch rants about the lack of the money shot in porn. He really wants to see cum all over a girl. But he also rants about motivational speakers.
Kieran brings in a story about a 150 year old dildo from China, made of Chine, sitting in Ireland.
The stats are in for who is searching for alien porn on PornHub. The results may sur
Episode 68 – Kieran Becomes A Boomer – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 68 – Kieran becomes a Boomer – We Only Do One Take Podcast
We are back in front of a live studio audience!
On the casting couch (as Kieran called it) with us today is Niall!
Kieran decides to be the biggest boomer on earth and complains about millennials not being appreciative. Turch on the other hand rants about Gift Cards. Jess decides to take Turch’s gift card.
Kieran brings up his fascination with sex dolls, and talks about the app he found to have the sex doll do foreplay with you.
Episode 67 - STORM AREA 51 - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 67 - STORM AREA 51 – We Only Do One Take Podcast
We are coming to get you area 51! In this episode the boys talk about the hug event where only 1.5 million people who are planning to storm 51!
Kieran reviews a film. No wait, he reviews the cinema in Ballarat, and gets told off for eating.
Turch rants about the television show Taboo.
And the boys go through the top chocolate bars in Australia and from around the world.
A gender is revealed, and Kieran loses his job for asking for lobster
Episode 66 - The Pen Edition
In this weeks episode....
Turch rants about pens! Kieran provides another excellent movie review! Korean woman get a mention and we discuss weird stuff found at music festivals.
Episode 65 – I Wish They All Could Be Korean Girls – We Only Do One Take Podcast
The boys are back with a new episode, and this will be the first new episode to be on Spotify! That’s right, the show is on Spotify. Pornhub, you’re next.
Jess is on this show, and she is there to confirm the winner of the WODOT weight loss challenge and someone has to read an apology. A video will be out very soon on YouTube.
Jess then rants about cooking, recipes and her inability to scroll down on a website.
With Kieran back from Singapore, he tells a weird story about the hierarchy of girls
Episode 64 – Chips, Hotdogs And Thots – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 64 – Chips, Hotdogs, and Thots – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran tells us how he organised a meeting where he just watched sports.
The weight loss challenge ends next week!
Australia was just surveyed to find out what is Australia’s favourite chip. The boys go through the finding with a fine tooth comb and discover that it’s wrong.
Kieran tells us what is harder than getting into Harvard University. Incredibly, it involves hotdogs.
Turch tells us of a scammer that contacted the podcas
Episode 63 – The Speed Of Elections – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 63 – The Speed of Elections – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Huge episode (as usual).
The boys also talk about their weight loss challenge and how they are better than Australian television presenter Samantha Armytage.
Turch rants about speed signed and old science, and somehow starts a political campaign.
Speaking of campaigning, the election results are finally out and everyone is super happy! So happy that everyone is moving to another country!
Turch and Kieran rant on about Go Fund Mes.
Episode 59
In this weeks (delayed) episode, it’s Kieran Birthday!!! Thanks to everyone who sent in a birthday message.
We discuss cos play, people injecting oil in their dicks, toilet humour, Michael Jackson, mean with beards have smaller penises, new condoms on the market, and the best invention ever, a baguette pillow!
Episode 62 – R U OK Sonic – We Only Do One Take Podcast
The challenge is definitely on with the weight loss challenge with the boys well on their way, both via different methods. Kieran on the LIte’n’Easy and Turch on the keto diet. The weight loss has definitely started! Kieran down 2.5 kilos and Turch down 4.9 kilos. Insanity!
But since the weight loss challenge has been going on, the boy’s toilet usage has changed. Turch rants about dry pisses, and pissing way too much. And also the issue of scratching your ass when you are in public.
Kieran tells
Episode 61 – Losing Weight And Respect– We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 61 – Losing Weight and Respect– We Only Do One Take Podcast
Holy crap, a new challenger has appeared!
Kieran has returned from holiday to find out he is the heaviest he has ever been. Turch agrees; they are both the heaviest they have ever been. A WEIGHT LOSS CHALLENGE to rival the Boomer vs Zoomer podcast begins!
Kieran tells us a story of Vietnam, again… I’m pretty sure that has been said before.
Turch makes a huge admission about the podcast we did with Who Are These Podcast? What act
Episode 60 –Wog Vs Wog Featuring Asterios Kokkinos – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 60 –Wod vs Wog featuring Asterios Kokkinos – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Can you believe Asterios Kokkinos is on the show!
We chat about:
• Terrible Australian internet
• Australian comedians and actors
• How much better Australia is compared to New Zealand
• Goon of Fortune
• The new Star Wars trailer, George Lucas’s love of Jar Jar Binks and Disney
• The Ukraine comedian who became the President
If you have never heard about Asterios, here is a brief overview!
• Star co-host of The Big
Episode 58 - The Budget Special - We Only Do One Take Podcast
In this weeks (delayed) episode, we discuss the budget! Turch or Kieran rants about something important!
I'm a little bit drunk uploading this in Vietnam, getting the spoons.
Happy Easter!
Episode 57 –The Earth Is Flat And We Have Proof – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 57 –The Earth Is Flat and We Have Proof – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Kieran is live in the studio for episode 57 of the podcast! And what an episode we have on our hands.
Kieran and Turch both have rants this time on very different topics. Kieran brings in the double up of ads on YouTube videos. Turch may have a solution, and the boys have a million dollar idea. On the other hand, Turch rants about petrol stations and the whole experience from pumping the petrol, to paying, to feeling r
Episode 56 – Shooters And Boomers And Pedos, Oh My! – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 56 – Shooters and Boomers and Pedos, Oh My! – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Another episode with Kieran via Skype, and incredibly, massive technical issues. Sigh. Sorry for the audio quality on this one.
With us is returning guest all the way back from episode 10, Damien!
A huge debating/ranting episode this one. Kieran brings up the Australian meme Eggboi. Turch goes on a rant, and Damien actually does the research and explains that the last time a politician got egged, we got the Austra
Episode 55 - Kieran goes on strike!
In this weeks episode
Turch rants about straws, Kieran goes on strike and has a fight with an SJW. Turch discusses the UK porn ban and we end up in a religion debate. Enjoy!
Episode 54 – Weird Fetishes With Dahn Rozario - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 54 – Weird Fetishes with Dahn Rozario - We Only Do One Take Podcast
This is the first episodes we are doing with Kieran via Skype, and incredibly, we only had a few small technical issues.
On this week’s episode, we have another incredible guest: professional stand-up comedian Dahn Rozario! Dahn has been working the circuits here in Melbourne for the last two years. Recently he has been on stage with a bunch of cool Australian comedians and is even hosting a bunch of events around Mlebou
Episode 52 – You Don’t Dog The Boys And You Don’t Dog The Bugle - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 52 – You don’t dog the boys and you don’- We Only Do One Take Podcast
In this week’s episode we have the CEO of our favourite news site back on the show, The Watsonia Bugle!
In this episode, Turch tells a fantastic story about the greatest feeling in the world: being 100% right and tells everyone how his dad made that feeling even better.
Kieran brings in stats from our favourite website, Pornhub stats! Turch and Bugle play a fun game; what is the most popular searched item on Pornhub. T
Episode 51 - Duncan The Drinking Bird - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 51 - Duncan the Drinking Bird - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Welcome back to the We Only Do One Take Podcast!
Episode 51, how did we come so far!
The boys are back in a new studio bringing you the hot news from around the globe.
A lot has changed other than the new studio. Kieran has moved to Ballarat for a new job and he goes on a super incredible rant about induction days.
Turch gives us another Tale from the Internet. In this week’s episode, Turch tells us the tale about John McAfee; h
Episode 50 – Holy Crap It’s The 50th Episode – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 50 – Holy Crap it’s the 50th Episode – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Holy crap, 50 episodes of the show!
How the hell did we make it this far?
On this show we have special recurring guest, the beautiful, the funny, the annoying Jess on the mic.
Jess kicks us off a rant. Guess what, it’s another rant about Kieran. It’s about episode 48. Holy crap what a shitshow. (Thank you James from Sydney)
Turch does the biggest rant of show and it involves mainstream media and YouTube stars.
Kieran read
Episode 49 – The First Massage of the New Year – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 49 – The First Massage of the New Year – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Happy New Year to all of our lovely wankers out there!
We are starting this year with another live episode from our Phillip Island studio in front of a live audience!
Sadly, there is no dildo testing competition this year. Check out our previous Phillip Island show here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BJxBRHJkya0 but Kieran finally opens his Christmas gift from Turch and describes it in the most phallic way possible. S
Episode 48 - The Xmas Special
We'll it is finally up! The actual episode 48! This has to be one the best episodes we have recorded!
We talk about Jesus's foreskin, Christmas and how people want to fuck the Grinch!
Check it out!
Episode 47 - Is beer to expensive?
In this weeks episode...
We rant about how the beer price is out of control. Also, a man builds a giant sculpture of a rude finger, poo is found on every McDonalds touch screen and Kieran is nominated for an award (the Uber late award)!
If you have a rant or a compliant, address it to the CEO, and we'll get back to you in 2019 (or 2020).
Episode 46 - The Margin of Error
Can you believe it, we are up to Episode 46!
A message from the CEO
To our dear listeners, Episode 46 is a cracker of a podcast. I am proud of our on time delivery of our podcasts. In fact, when we compare ourselves to other organisations, such as Connex or Yarra Trams, we bet them on time delivery by 1000%!
In fact, our podcasts are always delivered on time (within the margin of error)!
Enjoy
Episode 45 - The Birthday Special
Episode 45 – The Birthday Special
In this week’s episode…
Kieran has a movie review. It gets a whopping 2.5 stars! The best yet. An Italian city installs speed cameras, they collect 58,000 speeding fines in first two weeks. Turch reveals he has never received a speeding find. We discuss the science behind why wombats poo are shaped as cubes. A woman is suing her boyfriend as his long penis stretched her vagina. And did you know that there is 1.5 million witches in America! Plus, Happy Birthday
Episode 29 - The Worst Of The - We Only Do One Take Podcast
It's out.
And it's terrible.
Enjoy mother fuckers.
Episode 44 – Slightly Used Sex Toys for Sale – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Welcome back to the show!
Turch rants about people not using the traffic zipper method of merging onto freeways and highways.
Kieran tells us another million dollar idea: self-driving cars that can be used as mobile brothels. He will investigate further.
Turch gets Kieran to psychoanalyse another bride who set out a list of 10 rules for her husband. In the style of Art of the Deal, Turch helps the gentlemen out with a counter list to be used for negotiation.
Kieran tells us the best way to extra
Episode 43 - The Race that Stops a Nation - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 43 – The Race that Stops a Nation – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Welcome back to the show!
To celebrate a long weekend for the Melbourne Cup, the boys have special returning guest Ryan on the show.
Turch rants about how useless real estate agents have been during his time looking for a new place to live.
The boys talk about The Simpsons again, and how sad it is that Apu will be leaving the show.
Kieran tries to get the show to PAX, but forgets to complete the applications forms. Instead h
Kieran is... Dr Zeus - We Only Do One Take Podcast
A track featuring Kieran from episode 42 of the show!
Episode 42 - Bob And Jane - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 42: Bob and Jane!
In this weeks episode… Memes are making children fat! Kieran rants about the lack of food at a Hackathon! He also learn about 4Chan.
The Flushmate pressure-assisted toilet flushing system injures 1,500 people .
The worlds dumbest criminals are caught red-handed, by returning the scene of the crime.
And, Americans are advised to NOT dress their chickens in Halloween costumes.
It’s a great episode. Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook ad
Episode 41 - Holiday Blues - We Only Do One Take Podcast
We are back with season 3 and episode 41 of the We Only Do One Take Podcast! Sadly we are suffering a bit of the holiday blues.
Sigh
In this weeks episode, Turch rants about Americans, aeroplane toilets and hand dryers. Kieran also proves he is the weirdest man on earth.
Trump watch is back; includes news about a hooker, 1/1024th native american and Ye.
Kieran is back at it again with the super interesting stats from our favorite stats place; PornHub.
Turch also has a bone to pick with Kieran a
Episode 40 - The Midlife Crisis Special - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 40 – The Midlife Crisis Special
Holy crap we have made it to 40 episodes!
In this episode, we wanted to give back to all the fans and special guests and make it a huge rant based episode.
Big should out to Niall, Alice, Damien, Emkew and Cienan for their rants!
In the news this week: auctioneering skills are used to shut down a protester, an Italian sex doll brothel is shut down Al Capone style, a delicatessen steals $13,000 of ham and how FEMA loves waffles.
The boys rant too with huge
Episode 39 - Dogs Gone Wild - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 39 - Dogs Gone Wild
In this weeks episode…Female Monkeys don’t trust males, even when they are right! Turch rants about the decline in Uber’s service! We have more PornHub insights, plus Kanye West is going to be a creative director for the PornHub Awards Los Angeles. Dog sitting gone wild! A owner comes back to find shirtless man in living room making a porno. If you think that is bad, a childcare centre hired pole-dancers for their grand opening! And a discount store recalls thousands
Episode 38 - Troubles with the Wife - We Only Do One Take Podcast
And we are back with the show about nothing, the We Only Do One Take Podcast.
As we steadily climb up to special episode 40, the boys are slowly preparing. Plently of goodness coming your way.
In this week’s episode, Turch rants about boring people that have no hobbies and shamelessly promotes his gig at Bar 303 in Northcote, Melbourne, Victoria on the 8th September at around 9pm. Be there!
Kieran tells us the story of his Viking heritage, and the zinger that caused him to enter the exhibit back
Episode 37 - The Mile High Club - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Remember folks, when we change a Prime Minister, change your smoke alarm!!
At least you can rely on stability from the We Only Do One Take Podcast! In this weeks episode….
Kieran rants about free speech! Turch reveals the secrets on how to make your dating profile, excellent. An air marshal is arrested, Taco Bell revealed as the healthiest fast food restaurant, and watch out Jess, science reveals Kieran and Turch have a bromance!
Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook
Episode 36 - Rollies - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Holy crap how did we reach episode 36? Who the hells knows.
Kieran tells us a story of his dad, and how they plan to smuggle booze onto a boat, and the crazy lengths they are going about it.
Trump Watch is back on the menu, and the We Only Do One Take Podcast is happy to report that Trump is still in the WWE Hall of Fame and the President of the United States.
Turch tells us a story of schadenfreude. What a tale! A story about pornhub also comes up, of course. We hope that Nintendo gets a browse
Episode 35 - Deep Fried Chicken Diapers - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 35 - Deep Fried Chicken Diapers
In this weeks episode….
Chickens are wearing diapers, fed up residents give monkeys the pill to save crops, Kieran rants about truth being late, man refuses to remove Nazi flag after claiming neighbour hacked WI-FI. Plus the Pussy Melter is back by popular demand. Turch also rants about the all the stupid national awareness days.
Listen. Rinse. Repeat.
Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook and YouTube!
If you would like to se
Episode 34 - InVEST In Us - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Im this weeks episode, an important announcement from the Centre of Disease Control and Prevention, DON’T re-use your condoms! We also have more stats from the Pornhub insights team. Jess returns and shows us a singing dog, and Turch rants about music!
Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook and YouTube!
If you would like to send a rant to the show, record it on your phone and email it to us at weonlydoonetakepodcast@gmail.com
Or here: http://lmgtfy.com/?q=we+only+do+o
Episode 33 - We Only Do One Porn Take - We Only Do One Take Podcast
After a weeks break, we are back with Hip hop artist IKE Major joining us on the podcast!
As always, the most important news of the week is covered! A man has sex with woman, but doesn’t have a penis! Turch rants about news sites that have too much advertisement... and Kieran learns about music! Plus we rip into that famous person (you know, the one who made a sex tape).
Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook and YouTube!
If you would like to send a rant to the show,
Episode 32 – Rude Guitar Pedals – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 32 – Rude Guitar Pedals – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Turch is charged enormous fees, Kieran continues his love of Elon Musk and both boys hate shirts.
Kieran tells stories about another film he has seen, and rates a film five stars. What?!
Turch talks about Steel Panther, and the worst bit of censorship in a very long time.
A FIFA World Cup update and prediction (The boys like different teams for the final), and Trump watch is bank on the menu
And ends with the boys getting kick out.
Al
Episode 31 - Bear Patrol - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 31, Bear Patrol – Have you paid your bear tax?
In this weeks episode… a bear drinks a margarita and takes a dip in a California hot tub. Outrage in England, as beer glasses seized for being to small! We tell you the best way to eat popcorn. Pornhub have a new care team, and you won’t believe what they are doing now! And… we have some EPIC rants – don’t talk when your partner is reversing their car, Jess.
Plus we have an update on the Spoons and our CEO provides an update on episode 29!
Episode 30 – World Cup Fever - We Only Do One Take Podcast
World Cups chickens, digging big trenches, pizza delivery firemen and a bunch of stories about dogs; this episode has it all!
Plus, Turch rants about how people compete about how little sleep they have, and a whole bunch of other things that these people do sync up to create the most annoying kind of person.
Kieran on the other hand talks about the struggle of hearing loud people on the train.
With the World Cup on Turch brings in an article about a chicken. Whats the connection?
Kieran tells us
Episode 28 - Have You Invested In PotCoin Yet - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 28 – Have you invested in Pot Coin yet?
In this podcast, Kieran at 28 years of age, learns what a Calzone is. Char wins the sexiest cow competition. We update you on Kim Jung Un’s toilet that flew first class to Singapore! Thanks to Dennis Rodmas (former NBA player) who helped set the meeting between Trump and Un! He also invests his money on potcoin.com. More importantly, our CEO provides updates on the spoons. A
Episode 27 - Don't Be Late For Dinner - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 27 – Don’t Be Late for Dinner
Another great episode, we have another Billion dollar idea! There needs to be men couches that serve you drinks while your wife shops. Miss America scraps the swimsuit competition, Kieran and Turch are not happy! Jess joins us again as our guest and too our surprise Kieran turns up on time! By the way, don’t be late to dinner! Bonus material at the end of the episode.
Episode 26 – Puppet Jizz - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 26 – Puppet Jizz - We Only Do One Take Podcast
It’s episode 26 of the show, and the boys are still in the dark. Please, send Kieran your light bulbs. He really needs them.
Kieran starts the show off by requesting for more guitar solos, which never happens.
Then he rants about doctors who are late… which is all of them.
Whats in the news you say?
Turch brings in a court case where a man had his penis measured inside a courtroom to prove it was bigger than what the woman said it was.
Kier
Episode 25 – The Show At War – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 25 – The Show at War – We Only Do One Take Podcast
The rantiest episode ever
What a crazy episode! Turch and Kieran tell the wankers about the ongoing battle they are having with Spotify and PornHub.
As Turch has stated, please send Spotify a message saying that you want our podcast on their platform! It will really help us out!
Turch rants about another toilet issue, and it includes a shower; having to shit after you shower.
Kieran tells us about how German firefighters are being traine
Episode 24 - Send Us Your Light Bulbs
14 hour sex sessions, all you can eat pizza, virgina headphones and two epic rants (thanks Alice and Aaron). This podcast is probably our best yet!
Episode 23 – Just Fax It To Me - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 23 of the We Only Do One Take Podcast
On this episode we have self-proclaimed Nerd Supreme Ayoub!
Turch rants about his finger again, and complains about the public health system and fax machines.
Nerd supreme bring in a story about a man who cut another man’s grass, drunk… and was arrested for it. Kieran on the hand talks about how he wouldn’t get a chip inside of him, if you know what I mean.
Turch brings it all back to some of first episodes and brings up talk of male sex robots, and
Episode 22
A man's penis costs him $100,000! A Goose attacks a golfer, Uni students in the Cry Closet and Turch gets a new dog called Shaniqua!
Episode 21 – The Ruined Double Shot Of Scotch Segue – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 21 of the We Only Do One Take Podcast!
Our return guest is Niall for his fourth time on the show.
Kieran makes an apology on behalf of Turch in regards to the way he ends the show. Turch is definitely not sorry. A debate ensures and I’m pretty sure you will want that time you listened to it back.
The boys reminisce about last week’s phone call, and Jess tells Turch something magic that she learned.
Turch rants about the lack of double shots of scotch available at bars, and how bar tender
Episode 20 – The Worst Call In Show Ever – We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 20 of the We Only Do One Take Podcast
Twenty episodes in. Who let us do this?
In this episode we celebrate Kieran’s birthday. Turch tells Kieran what he was going to give him for his birthday, but decided against it.
Kieran tells us the story of where he spent his birthday, which leads into the best rant ever; lack of food and beverage facilities within a hospital.
Turch continues his quest to find all of the stupid shit Nintendo have said about their character; this week it’s Waluigi.
K
Episode 19 - How To Cosplay Featuring CeejayAndTheCosplay And Heidzdee - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Welcome back to the We Only Do One Take Podcast. It is season 2! Holy crap how the hell did we get to season 2?
On this very special start to the season, two guests that we have been wanting to get onto the show for ages; professional Australian cosplayers Cienan and Heidi!
Turch is back with a new rant. As he has returned from his cruise with his family, he is full of vigour and amazingly, he does not rant about family holidays. Instead he rants about entitled people who complain about petty th
Episode 18 - The Easter Special
Episode 18 - The Easter Special! This is the final podcast for the season (though we are only having a one week break). Kieran and Turch have a push up competition. Kieran fails the competition and has to read out an apology letter written by Turch.
Episode 17 - Drunktopia - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Grab your bingo cards from the facebook page, because this episode is a classic. Trump watch is back! CEO Kieran talks about the patron account (still no action) and Turch has a million dollar idea (it's called Porn Savers).
Episode 16 - A Full Buffet Spread With R Pow - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 16 of the We Only Do One Take Podcast!
Another big episode with special guest R Pow. R Pow is the co-host of Gourmetgoring, which is a drunk cooking show with WODOT co-host Kieran. Episodes are currently in pre-production and will be out very soon!
R takes on the rant today, and rants about people not reciprocating favours, and people eating your food that you are saving in the fridge. Unforgivable
CEO Kieran talks up the spoons again, and nothing comes of it.
Turch talks about the bigge
Episode 15 - Urine Looks Like Spilt White Wine - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 15 of the Wee Only Do One Take Podcast
On this episode we have long-time friend and drummer from Dead City Ruins, Nick Traj!
Turch starts this piss soaked episode with a rant about piss driblets, and alos talks about the upcoming push up competition to be hosted by the We Only Do One Take Podcast.
Kieran spills his drink all over Traj twice, as well as breaks his wine glass.
Trajs tells us how to cure masturbation with an old home remedy.
Kieran talks about some local news, and brings up
Episode 14 - Actors And Conspiracy Theorists Moving Boxes On The Moon Featuring Adam La Rosa
Episode 14 of the We Only Do One Take Podcast
Holy crap what an exciting guests we have on the show today: actor, producer, blogger and conspiracy theorist, Adam La Rosa!
The boys get to talk to Adam and dive into his career as an actor and how he got to be the Executive Producer of the award winning film The Legend of Ben Hall. He also talks spills the beans of some of the cool and insider parts of the Australian film industry.
Adam is also an avid conspiracy theorists, and Turch and Kieran div
Episode 13 - Grandmothers Growing Cannabis In Cinemas - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 13 of the We Only Do One Take Podcast!
Holy crap what an episode! And the first time we have a studio audience
Turch starts off with a killer rant about food, and Kieran is far too intrigued. Kieran also talks about a lovely grandmother who likes gardening.
We finally tell a Valentine’s Day story about a man who really wanted to see the Red Hot Chilli Peppers with his partners, and gets a surprise.
Kieran teases our potential show at the Melbourne Comedy Festival.
We feel sorry for all t
Episode 12 - The Mystery Of The Dirty Sandwich Press - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 12 of the We Only Do One Take Podcast
We have our first returning guest, Niall on the show, and he is severely unprepared. Lucky, we have him covered.
This week, Kieran talks of the mysteries of the kitchen etiquette, including a dirty sandwich press.
Turch gets really angry regarding artwork and books being censored, and Niall talks about a crappy law about straws in the USA.
Turch also tries his hand at talking about the sponsor... in his best Kieran voice... oh boy.
We Only Do One Take Classical Theme
The classical guitar version of the We Only Do One Take Podcast Theme as used on the video Jabari's Story.
Watch the video here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2-b_Ohe8eJs
Subscribe to the We Only Do One Take Podcast on Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/weonlydoonetakepodcast/
Episode 11 - A Deep Chasm With The Watsonia Bugle - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 11 of the We Only Do One Take Podcast!
Turch and Kieran have a very special guest on the show, The CEO and Food and Beverage Director or the news organisation The Watsonia Bugle.
With the help of the bugle, Turch dives into the week with a rant about stupid types of yoga and then Kieran tells far too many stories about his recent trip to Vietman. The bugle does the Trump Watch, which involves a cute puppy!
Cheers to The Watsonia Bugle for coming on the show! Check them out here:
https:/
Episode 10 - Fashlexic Camels - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 10 of the We Only Do One Take Podcast!
This weeks episode Kieran and Turch have a very special guest on the show: Damien!
Damien is here to talk about all sorts of dating stories and chime in with more zingers than you can possibly imagine.
There is also talk about a camel fashion show, and Kieran discusses his 'fashion sense'.
Turch rants about black dogs.
If you are single, and are looking for a date, we potentially could hook you up with Damien.
Episode 09 - Emu Wizards Vs The Cost Of Beer - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode nine of the We Only Do One Take Podcast!
In this episode, Turch rants about his most hated bunch of fans: Harry Potter fans. He especially hates Harry Potter weddings...
Kieran also tells us of the great Perth War regarding the cost of beer, and tells us what we can do to help.
The boys also discuss Australia's biggest loss.
Episode 08 - Orthodontic Meditation Featuring Emkew - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 08 of the We Only Do One Take Podcast
In this week’s episode, Kieran and Turch have very special guest Mash, aka Emkew (the rapper), who dives into talk about meditation, celebrity and music composition.
On the other side of the spectrum, Kieran and Turch talk into the 2017 porn stats and learn that Rick and Morty porn is the hip new thing and what kind of things are happening in the back of police cars in Australia.
Kieran also asks Turch about his shower habits.
And… this is the first
We Only Do One Take Podcast Theme
The show finally has an intro theme!
And it was written by Turch!
Killer!
Full track coming soon!
Episode 07 - Souvenir Spoon Edition - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 07 of the We Only Do One Take Podcast
After a crazy New Years, Kieran finally tells the story of how he went missing on the podcast Phillip Island show.
We also hear the story of how the dildos were purchased for the challenge, and we invite a new guest on the show.
Turch gets back on the Trump watch, and Kieran goes to the cricket.
And somehow, the show is making souvenir spoons...
Episode 06 - The Happy New Year Dildo Special - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 06 of the We Only Do One Take Podcast.
This is a super special LIVE New Years Day (literally 1 in the morning) episode, and Turch and Kieran completed their dildo challenge.
Kieran somehow goes missing in this episode, and previous guest Jess takes over.
4 dildos.
4 contestants
A winner?
Listen to find out!
Episode 05 - The Backyard Cricket Boxing Day Special - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode five of the We Only Do One Take Podcast!
Turch and Kieran have survived the Christmas season and are backing in the studio to celebrate on Boxing Day.
Jess is no longer sick, and is in the studio to help the boys talk about piss on toilet seats, sitting or standing while wiping, pineapple on pizza and giant penises.
And Kieran tells a long story...
Episode 04 - The Drunken Christmas Special - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Ho Ho Ho, Merry Christmas!
Episode four the We Only Do One Take Podcast!
In this episode, Turch and Kieran talk all things Christmas including how to survive a hangover, what not to do with your cremated dead mother and how you can really please your partner this Christmas.
Bonus: fresh music from Turch and financial advice from the newly named Cunty Accountant
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https://www.facebook.com/weonlydoonetakepodcast/
Episode 03 - Lizard People - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode three of the We Only Do One Take Podcast!
In this episode Kieran and Turch take on the mysteries Lizard People, microwaves and getting around bets.
Not only that, we have Blain on this episode who eats a whole nutella calzone while we record.
There is also a sweet rant about weddings.
Like us on Facebook!
https://www.facebook.com/weonlydoonetakepodcast/
Funk Theme - We Only Do One Take Podcast
The first original track for the podcast!
A much needed sexy funk theme for all of those sexy new articles we read.
Written and played by Turch
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Episode 02 - PRONOUNCIATION - We Only Do One Take Podcast
Episode 2 of the We Only Do One Take Podcast!
On the show, special guest Niall chimes in with his comedy stylings. Kieran and Turch talk about Trump, Milo Yiannopoulos, sex robots and Kieran learns that alcohol makes him a better speaker.
Like us on Facebook!
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Episode 01 - We Only Do One Take Podcast
The first episode of the We Only Do One Take Podcast!
Turch and Kieran talk about the Triple J top 100, people who can't read and have a heated debate about sex robots.
Like us on Facebook!
https://www.facebook.com/weonlydoonetakepodcast/