The Boundaries.me Podcast
Dr. Henry Cloud
Dr. Henry Cloud's Boundaries.me podcast features inspiring stories about the benefits to your relationships, mental health, productivity and wellbeing that come when you implement healthy boundaries.
The Dr. Cloud Show - The Architecture of Resilience
In this first episode of the new year, Dr. Cloud explores the architecture of personal resilience, using the metaphor of building a house to explain how people can strengthen their ability to cope with life's challenges. The episode opens with a thoughtful discussion about the devastating fires in Los Angeles, transitioning into an exploration of how people can build emotional resilience. Dr. Cloud addresses boundaries in toxic relationships, rebuilding trust after abuse, navigating a difficult
Feb 28, • 57:10
The Dr. Cloud Show - Change Your Unhealthy Thinking Patterns
Much of your thinking is automatic, and that can be a great thing. No one needs to analyze every stroke of the toothbrush, so to speak. The problem, Dr. Henry Cloud contends, is when we default to thinking patterns that don’t work for situations that require us to be more considered and deliberate with our minds. One of the issues is that automatic thinking can lead to deeply ingrained patterns of behavior that self-reinforce. You have to ask yourself some questions about these automatic thought
Jul 1, 2024 • 53:28
The Dr. Cloud Show - Reimagining Time Management
Dr. Cloud discusses the concept of time management from a different perspective. He argues that rather than managing time itself, which is finite and unchangeable, the focus should be on how we manage ourselves within that time. Dr. Cloud identifies common reasons people may not use their time effectively, such as feeling emotionally isolated, having poor boundaries in saying no to requests, and excessive perfectionism. He gives the example of his father's philosophy of doing things "good enough
Jun 21, 2024 • 37:21
The Dr. Cloud Show - The Art of Constructive Criticism
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Dr. Cloud explores criticism and its role in personal growth and relationships. He argues that when done with the right approach, criticism can be an act of love that facilitates positive change. Dr. Cloud provides tips on giving and receiving criticism effectively. He emphasizes specificity over global statements, using "I" statements, setting a positive tone, making it a conversation, and offering actionable feedback. He also examines motivations behind
Jun 13, 2024 • 1:05:38
The Dr. Cloud Show - From Distress to Resilience: Dr. Cloud's 10 Tips for Hard Times
Dr. Cloud presents 10 tips to help individuals navigate through difficult times in a practical and actionable manner. He emphasizes the importance of seeking professional help when needed, but also offers self-care strategies to alleviate temporary distress. Key points include combating isolation, focusing on what's within one's control, setting boundaries, processing grief, challenging catastrophic thinking, practicing self-care (sleep, exercise, stress relief), taking breaks, and maintaining p
Jun 7, 2024 • 1:12:40
Episode 411 - The Dr. Cloud Show - The Upside of Struggle
Dr. Cloud explores the idea that achieving anything of value in life requires doing things we don't want to do. He draws from personal experiences, such as pulling an all-nighter to meet a book deadline, and uses relatable examples like losing weight or building a successful marriage. Dr. Cloud emphasizes that embracing this mindset – that discomfort and effort are necessary for growth – is crucial. He touches on parenting styles that may inadvertently shield children from struggles, preventing
May 31, 2024 • 1:10:26
The Dr. Cloud Show - Mastering the Effective Apology
Ever feel like apologizing isn’t working? In this thought-provoking talk, Dr. Cloud delves into the art of offering a sincere and effective apology. He emphasizes that a genuine apology is a powerful tool for repairing and strengthening relationships. Dr. Cloud breaks down the essential components of a good apology, including expressing empathy, taking ownership without making excuses, acknowledging the consequences, and committing to preventing future occurrences. He also highlights the importa
May 20, 2024 • 33:02
Episode 409 - The Dr. Cloud Show - Rekindling the Marital Flame
Dr. Cloud provides guidance for couples struggling to reignite their romantic spark. Drawing from biblical wisdom and psychological expertise, he explores the natural seasons of marriage and offers strategies to reignite passion. He encourages couples to reflect on how they prioritized careers over their relationship, examine psychological factors behind this shift, and revisit activities that fostered initial connection. Dr. Cloud recommends revisiting initial bonding activities, making time to
May 8, 2024 • 1:07:37
Episode 408 - The Dr. Cloud Show - Managing Anxiety with Response Inhibition
Dr. Henry Cloud takes a deep dive into the world of anxiety, honing in on a crucial aspect: learning to navigate internal anxieties without giving in to typical responses. From unraveling the physical effects of anxiety to unraveling the mind's interpretations, Dr. Cloud sheds light on the power of response inhibition in managing anxieties. With relatable stories and practical insights, this video guides you through the art of sitting with anxiety instead of running from it. Audience Write-in Qu
May 2, 2024 • 1:08:39
The Dr. Cloud Show - Skills for Handling Gaslighting
Just knowing what gaslighting is can be a big first step to breaking free from it . The problem is that withstanding gaslighting is another matter. Dr. Henry Cloud discusses the concept of gaslighting, a psychological technique used to manipulate and control others by making them question their own reality. He delves into how gaslighters undermine individuals' subjective experience of reality to gain power over them. Dr. Cloud explains the impact of gaslighting on individuals, the vulnerable tra
Apr 26, 2024 • 1:27:14
The Dr. Cloud Show - Becoming a Free and Separate Person
You may think you are a separate and free person when you look in the mirror. You’re not physically attached to someone else. As a person connected to others through relationships however you might not be the free and separate person you see in the mirror. Dr. Henry Cloud talks about how so many of us are not free and separate people within our relationships. You might not be in charge of making decisions, someone might be controlling the decisions and behaviors that should be yours! Here’s the
Apr 15, 2024 • 1:27:37
The Dr. Cloud Show - Ways to Fix Your Attachment Problems
Much of how we bond and attach to others is formed in early childhood. Dr. Henry Cloud shows you how to look at your attachment style and find ways to get to a secure attachment. The attachments you have early on, whether healthy, inconsistent, or toxic, will have a huge affect on you. How do you experience your need for others? This is a critical aspect to how you attach. When your relationship with your needs are filled with conflict your attachment will be unsteady. Dr. Cloud breaks down the
Apr 12, 2024 • 1:23:01
The Dr. Cloud Show - The Problem with Personality Tests
By and large, personality type tests are very helpful as an initial assessment tool. But Dr. Henry Cloud wants you to get a better understanding of what they are actually useful for and where they fall short. One of the great things about them is that they allow us to see that a person’s behavior might not be coming from some malicious place, but from a propensity based on their personality. That's a huge step forward in building healthy relationships! Here’s the problem: a lot of people will ta
Apr 10, 2024 • 1:08:16
The Dr. Cloud Show - You Need to Change Your Definition of Responsibility
What thoughts come to mind when you think of responsibility? Is it burdensome, negative, or toxic? If you think that you’re not alone. The word often gets twisted during our upbringing because it’s brought down on you, it’s used in a repressive and toxic way. Dr. Henry Cloud wants you to think differently about responsibility. Outside pressure and duty are often associated with responsibilities, and if those extrinsic factors went away you would not keep those responsibilities. Dr. Cloud elabora
Apr 6, 2024 • 1:23:03
The Dr. Cloud Show - The Two Keys to Accomplishing Anything
You may have heard from this show that motivation is not correlated with goal achievement–in fact it can be inversely correlated with it. What then are the factors that have the biggest impact on accomplishing goals? Dr. Henry Cloud shows us that what matters most is first the belief that your goal can be achieved. The second factor is prioritization. In this short talk, Dr. Cloud will help you get clear about what really works for making things happen in your life. Remember, if everything is a
Apr 1, 2024 • 1:19:45
The Dr. Cloud Show - One Simple Way to Increase Resilience
“Resilience” is a word that is thrown around a lot these days, and for good reason. We could all use a little more of it. But what is resilience, and how does one become more resilient? Dr. Henry Cloud breaks down the subject like this: There are negative events in your life from a small problem to something potentially catastrophic. Those are the external things that happen. Resilience lies within the person responding to those events. How you see yourself, how you view your own strength and co
Mar 29, 2024 • 1:28:17
Episode 400 - The Dr. Cloud Show - Motivation Might Be Holding You Back
Wanting to do something and actually doing it are two very different things. Dr. Henry Cloud wants you to stop thinking of motivation as the key to success. While of course motivation is an important part of getting started, it can also cause problems. Hope deferred makes the heart sick, as the Bible says, and motivations that don’t lead to actions can cause their own set of problems along these same lines. An addict may want to get clean and be motivated to do so, but at each turn they find an
Mar 22, 2024 • 1:09:54
Episode 399 - The Dr. Cloud Show - Dealing with Different Types of Narcissists
Narcissism has become such a commonplace word that not only has it lost its specificity, but in doing so it has become difficult to identify the types of narcissistic behavior you might be dealing with. Dr. Henry Cloud wants you to learn what type of narcissistic patterns a person may have. Some narcissists can change for the better, and others can’t. Dr. Cloud describes the different underlying causes of this behavior and how you can address the entitlement that it presents as. In some cases yo
Mar 19, 2024 • 1:14:33
The Dr. Cloud Show - Symptoms vs Root Causes
When you’re struggling, you’re usually going to have a symptom: you might be anxious, depressed, afraid, overreacting. You might be getting stuck accomplishing something. Whatever your symptoms might be, Dr. Henry Cloud wants you to see the key differences between symptoms and root causes. Learning more about your symptoms can help you see where your root causes are, but continuing to treat the symptoms without investigating the causes won’t lead to real change. Dr. Cloud wants you to stop and e
Mar 12, 2024 • 1:10:28
Episode 397 - The Dr. Cloud Show - Fake It Till You Make It
While of course being your authentic self is always a good idea, "faking it" can be an incredible tool. Dr. Henry Cloud talks about the psychological power that comes from faking it till you make it. Whenever a new task is put in front of you that you don’t know exactly how to do, this technique can be used to give you the confidence you’ll need to learn. When we are put in a position where we don’t have the requisite understanding or skills to perform, the process of faking it till you make it
Mar 4, 2024 • 1:05:06
he Dr. Cloud Show - How Criticism Can Help You
What’s the first thing you think of when you hear the word “criticism?” How you handle criticism is not just a measure of your patience, it’s also a huge growth opportunity. Dr. Henry Cloud explains how changing the frame through which you look at criticism can greatly improve your relationships and your performance. How you feel about criticism can also tell you a lot about your character. Getting to the next level in your life involves improving on things or adding new things to your life, wha
Feb 23, 2024 • 1:02:57
The Dr. Cloud Show - What’s Your Conflict Type?
How do you work on conflicts in a relationship? Dr. Henry Cloud wants you to think about which way you lean when something comes up that’s either uncomfortable, argumentative or otherwise conflictual in your relationships. Understanding that there are basically three types of behavior that you might engage in, one of them being more prevalent in your life. The three types are moving toward, moving away, or moving against. You will always move in one of these directions during a conflict. Where t
Feb 16, 2024 • 58:47
The Dr. Cloud Show - Initial Choice Doesn’t Equal Change
One thing most of us do with the word “choice” is that we equate it with the power to make something happen. Dr. Henry Cloud wants you to rethink what choice is actually capable of bringing to your life. Choice is great, it’s important, but it’s not a methodology. That’s to say that willpower and choice are not a method of change alone. Your initial choice can set your direction, and that’s a hugely powerful start, but that does not lead to staying power. When you’re setting a goal, definitely u
Feb 9, 2024 • 51:42
The Dr. Cloud Show - Are You a Child or an Adult?
Unlike in the distant past, we don’t really have a rite of passage to adulthood. Dr. Henry Cloud talks about how regardless of how many degrees you have, or how old you are, being an adult is not a guarantee on age or merit alone. So what is adulthood, and how do we get to it? You’ve probably met people that have made it far into their lives and still aren’t an adult yet. Dr. Cloud talks about what it means to be a responsible, independent adult. You may physically be an adult, but there are emo
Feb 5, 2024 • 1:03:36
The Dr. Cloud Show - Using Regret to Change Your Life
Regrets are inevitable in this life and can bring us great sadness. Dr. Henry Cloud wants you to think differently about how you look at your regrets. When we talk about regret we’re talking about loss and the emotional pain that comes with that. What can really be helpful is letting regret show us what we don’t want to lose. The trouble is that guilt will accompany the regret and that can prevent you from mourning what you’ve lost. Dr. Cloud asks you to transform your normal reactions of guilt
Feb 3, 2024 • 1:11:37
The Dr. Cloud Show - The Two Driving Factors of Life
Our life is driven by two key drives and they are often at odds with each other. Dr. Henry Cloud talks about how these two drives can be worked together. Drive number one is our need to connect and feel connected. The second drive is our aggression. When when we can merge these drives together it’s called drive neutralization and it will greatly improve your relationships and your performance. Written question: How do successful people think differently about outcomes? Sally needs help with an i
Jan 30, 2024 • 1:09:23
Episode 390 - The Dr. Cloud Show - What People Who Love Each Other Do
Loving someone and treating them with love are two different things. Dr. Henry Cloud reminds us of what we can do to be more proactive in our loving relationships. Written question: Do physical activities help people heal from trauma? Kerri is housing kids from a youth group and wants advice on how to help a traumatized 17 year old open up. Sarah feels like a crappy person and doesn't know why. What can do to get started unpacking these feelings? Margie is putting up simple boundaries and her in
Jan 26, 2024 • 59:36
The Dr. Cloud Show - Choose Personal Responsibility
Changing your life is always a difficult task, but it’s nearly impossible without accepting personal responsibility. Dr. Henry Cloud gets into what you should and shouldn’t take responsibility for and how this awareness can transform your life and the options you have. Written question: Lately I feel like my attention and ability to focus is being stolen away from me. There are so many distractions, from email to messaging apps, and group chats, and social media, and all of the other notificatio
Jan 22, 2024 • 1:05:10
Episode 388 - The Dr. Cloud Show - How to Remain Positive
How do you stay positive when all of life is coming at you like work, kids, social issues, health problems etc? Dr. Henry Cloud discusses a key element that the mature possess and immature lack: being able to hold the good and bad together at the same time. Written question: Can you offer any advice or strategies to help me find my bearings and start moving forward with purpose and clarity? Connor is struggling with overreacting to his wife’s moods and wants to know how to be more centered. Writ
Jan 19, 2024 • 1:10:42
The Dr. Cloud Show - Loneliness in Relationships
One of the worst feelings you can have in a relationship is loneliness despite being in the presence of another person. Dr. Henry Cloud works through how this all too common problem can be resolved. He uses the example of “I, Thou” where both people in the relationship are showing up with attunement. Written question: Is it better to have a counselor that didn't know you previously so as not to have biases? Jonathan wants to open up to others but doesn't know how to connect after a difficult di
Jan 17, 2024 • 1:02:27
The Dr. Cloud Show - Personal Growth Depends on This
What you are capable of, what you are not capable of, and which one is true are all derived from how you perceive yourself within the context of the world and peoplearound you. Dr. Henry Cloud shares ways to expand how you look at yourself, what you’re capable of, and your relationships with what is outside you. Adrienne needs help dealing with a short tempered father. Lizzie doesn't know whether a romantic interest is safe after he withheld some important things from her. Donna is hoping for a
Jan 9, 2024 • 1:11:27
The Dr. Cloud Show - How Your Day to Day Life Can Heal You
How is it possible that your day to day life can heal you? Dr. Henry Cloud explains how specific but small changes in your day to day life can lead to big changes. Lauren asks Dr. Cloud how to grieve a friendship that's over. Erika is having trouble healing from financial trauma that's causing poor spending behaviors. Mandy was neglected by her mother and is still having trouble finding safe and meaningful way to connect with her. Boundaries.Me Plus is on sale until of the end of the year! You
Dec 29, 2023 • 1:18:55
Episode 384 - The Dr. Cloud Show - The Past is the Best Predictor of the Future
The past is the best predictor of the future. Dr. Henry Cloud explains how patterns can be utilized to change your future. By looking at the past honestly we can begin altering our present actions. Mary needs help addressing her in-laws' toxic behavior. Andrea wants to know when it's the right to time to get exclusive in dating relationships. Dan has started a successful business and is getting regular jobs but needs help focussing on the foundation of the business itself. Boundaries.Me Plus i
Dec 26, 2023 • 1:03:44
Episode 383 - The Dr. Cloud Show - The Power of Empathy
Dr. Henry Cloud talks about why empathy is central to having deeper relationships than you have right now. The power of empathy is that it circles back to us. Dr. Cloud explains how as we listen to others and understand their feelings we will begin emotionally regulating ourselves. John is dating someone long distance and wants to know if there's a "right" way to do it. Sally had an affair a while ago and still feels shut out of the relationship. Ginger is trying to find peace after losing a sis
Dec 22, 2023 • 58:32
The Dr. Cloud Show - Recovering from Break-up Pain
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Dec 19, 2023 • 1:15:19
The Dr. Cloud Show - Big Obstacles, Small Obstacles
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Dec 15, 2023 • 1:02:10
Episode 380 - The Dr. Cloud Show - Budgeting Holiday Time and Energy
If you've listened to Dr. Cloud before then you know how much he cares about time and energy. Around the holidays this is especially important. He talks about how to utilize your time and energy so that you're getting the most out of this special time of year. Kieran is trying to spend more time with his girlfriend but her sister is getting in the way. Alexis wants to make peace with her mom without getting manipulated in the process. Maron is feeling dating fatigue and wants to know if she's br
Dec 11, 2023 • 1:07:32
The Dr. Cloud Show - Holiday Blues
The Dr. Cloud Show returns! In this episode Dr. Henry Cloud talks about how to get through the holidays with a smile on your face. He takes a call from Betsy who is looking to help her friends through difficulty in their marriage. Carol needs help setting boundaries around financially helping her adult daughter. And Colleen is having trouble with the spiritual aspects of joining a secular support group. Boundaries.Me Plus is on sale until of the end of the year. You can get a full year of acce
Dec 8, 2023 • 1:17:51
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - Becoming Yourself
What is the psychology of becoming yourself? How is your identity formed? This is a deceptively layered question related not only to your past, but to your present and future. There is a concept here that’s important to understand: your true self, and your false self are not the same. We all understand who our true selves are, but our false selves are that person we show to the world out of fear, insecurity, or lack of understanding where we fit in. Sometimes, we lose track of who is who. Dr. Cl
Mar 2, 2023 • 20:39
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - Get Clear About Your Purpose - Difficult Conversations Part 3
In this third final mini session on difficult conversations Dr. Cloud talks about getting clear about the purpose you’re bringing to the conversation. What are you trying to do? Are you trying to win, trying to persuade, to convince, to show you are right? Or, are you trying to find a solution? When we come with the goal of finding a solution that works for both sides it becomes motivational. This is how we leave a conversation with real change on the horizon. When we transform the other person
Feb 17, 2023 • 8:42
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - Preparing for the Conversation - Difficult Conversations Part 2
In this highlight, Dr. Cloud goes into part two of his session on having a difficult conversation. This one is all about preparation. How do you bring your best and keep your fear in check when entering into a difficult conversation? First, you have to have a difficult conversation with yourself. What splinter is stuck in your finger? We have to take that splinter out before we go into the conversation. Sometimes we do that by talking with someone that isn’t involved in the situation to bleed of
Feb 8, 2023 • 15:34
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - Creating a Safe Space - Difficult Conversations Part 1
This is part one of a short series on how to have difficult conversations. In this highlight Dr. Cloud talks about an important skill to build before having a difficult conversation. In this session, he talks about how to create safe space for conversations that could explode. There are a few major issues that arise in difficult conversations: fight, flight or freeze. Dr. Cloud shares ways to make the conversation psychologically safe for the other person. A psychologically safe space is where b
Feb 2, 2023 • 14:14
Episode 374 - The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - Pushing Past Perceived Limits
In this highlight from the show, Dr. Cloud talks about how we hold ourselves back internally from being who we want to be, or doing what we want with our lives. As children we are kept on short leashes and as we become adults it can be extremely difficult to accept our freedom. No one is holding the leash anymore, but in our heads it’s still there. As long as we keep these mental leashes in our minds, our lives will stay very small. You might associate leash with a comfort zone, and that’s defin
Jan 21, 2023 • 13:55
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - Love, Limits, and Codependency
In this highlight from the show, Dr. Cloud talks about love and limits. One of the more difficult things about loving others is that we make ourselves vulnerable. Codependency easily arises in relationships when we fear losing love and enable bad behavior to prevent that love from leaving. The question then is whether we’re loving them fully when we don’t set limits around bad behavior. Dr. Cloud argues that in fact love and limits working in tandem are required in order for healthy love. Limits
Nov 16, 2022 • 22:20
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - One Guaranteed Way to Ruin Relationships
In celebration of 5 years of Boundaries.Me, we are hosting an open house October 17-31! All of our courses, coaching, and community are available for free during this time, with no credit card and no purchase required. Visit http://www.boundaries.me/openhouse to join us. In this highlight from the show, Dr. Cloud talks about one sure fire way to ruin relationships: Fairness. Why would fairness ruin all of our relationships? Because it requires perfection, and none of us can live up to that. Th
Oct 28, 2022 • 12:17
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - The Problem with Avoiding Pain
In this highlight, Dr. Cloud talks about something all of us are guilty of: avoiding pain. The psychologist RD Laing said, “There is a great deal of pain in life and perhaps the only pain that can be avoided is the pain that comes from trying to avoid pain.” Avoiding pain is a prescription for more pain. Dr. Cloud shares ways to address pain with less fear, and stop avoiding pain. Dr. Cloud's next workshop is called The Path. The Path is a life-changing online workshop that will teach you how
Oct 20, 2022 • 6:41
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - The Power of Your Relationships
You’ll constantly hear about two main areas to improve on in your life: the physical and the metaphysical. But that’s not the whole story. In fact, it’s missing a HUGE part of our lives–the third leg of the stool if you will. In no particular order there are three areas we we need to maintain and improve on in our lives. One is our physical bodies. Next we have our metaphysical side (our thoughts, moods, spirit etc.). And third we have who we are connected with, our relationships. Having strong
Oct 12, 2022 • 11:07
Episode 369 - The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - We Need Good Struggles
In this highlight from the show, Dr. Cloud presents us with a seeming paradox of growth: developing new abilities and meeting challenges involves struggle. Trees need wind in order to stay standing–they need the stress of wind to stimulate the growth of deeper roots. It’s a parallel that applies to us humans too. Good stress fosters growth. Just like we need resistance to grow muscles, we need metaphysical challenges to grow spiritually and mentally. Not only do we need to change the way we see
Oct 6, 2022 • 14:34
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - A Deceptively Easy Way to Stop Procrastinating
In this highlight from the show, Dr. Cloud talks about how and why we procrastinate and gives us some deceptively simple ways to address it. It starts with shrinking the task. Because the things we are putting off doing are always overwhelming in some way, the key is in breaking it down to one simple thing you can do. It’s not that you lack the ability to do the thing you’re avoiding, it’s just that you aren’t moving. Your emergency brake is engaged. Get that parking brake off, pop that tiny hol
Sep 28, 2022 • 12:01
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - What Makes for a Good Accountability Partner?
Starting on a successful path of growth requires having a good accountability partner. So what makes for a good accountability partner? Dr. Cloud goes through a short checklist of what to seek out and what to avoid in our candidates. Dr. Cloud's next workshop is on Healing Parental Wounds. In this 2-hour live streaming webinar Dr. Cloud will help you identify your parental relationship injuries, understand how to face them, and give you the practical tools and advice you need to grow past you
Sep 21, 2022 • 9:44
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - Replacing Critical Voice in Your Head
Dr. Cloud's next workshop is on Healing Parental Wounds. In this 2-hour live streaming webinar Dr. Cloud will help you identify your parental relationship injuries, understand how to face them, and give you the practical tools and advice you need to grow past your suffering. If you can't attend live, don't worry, you can stream the recording as much as you like. To find out more about it go to https://Boundaries.me/parental Get one week of free coaching videos from Dr. Cloud and boundaries.me!
Sep 14, 2022 • 18:49
Episode 365 - The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - Building Self Confidence
We all want to be self confident but it’s often elusive. Dr. Cloud takes us through an introduction on how we acquire self confidence. Self confidence comes from trusting yourself and your actions. That’s hard to do when we doubt ourselves. Dr. Cloud brings it back to original sin, and the idea that we are able to judge like God does. When we commit to these types of self judgments we are no longer simply doing the thing in front of us, but also criticizing it in ways that cause anxiety, fear of
Aug 26, 2022 • 19:36
Episode 364 - The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - Stop Wasting Your Time and Start Making Better Decisions
In this highlight from The Dr. Cloud Show: When we’re trying to get from point A to B in a relationship or with a goal, a critical factor is our time. Literally anything we want to improve on–an addiction, finances, raising children, learning a new skill–requires time and prioritization. How we use our time is obviously important, but it’s very easy to miss the reality of what we’re doing with it. That’s where the time audit comes in. When you learn where you’re actually spending your time doing
Aug 17, 2022 • 18:55
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - Don't Get Stuck on One Formula
In this highlight from the podcast, Dr. Cloud discusses the old cliche about how your thinking determines your feelings. Does your thinking change your feelings? Do your feelings change your behavior? Does your behavior change your thinking? In short, yes, to all of these depending on what you need to address. It might not be intuitive. You might be feeling anxious, and you know that changing your thinking will change how you’re feeling, but good luck! We often find that with anxiety, we need to
Aug 13, 2022 • 12:04
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - External Growth Starts On The Inside
Achieving the ideals in life–feeling good, having great relationships, and accomplishing goals–is something that all of us want. It’s funny that so many of us struggle with this right? So often the first crucial step is missing. You have to focus on the inside. Seeking internal growth is required to see the changes we want come into existence. Dr. Cloud asks: What path are you on to work on your internal growth? Dr. Cloud's "Getting Over Trauma" workshop is on August 30th at 5pm Pacific! Get 2
Aug 4, 2022 • 17:05
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - The No-Choice Choice
In this highlight from the Dr. Cloud Show, Henry talks about a key mental state for making big changes. 99% of what you’re trying to accomplish in your life has been done, even the really hard stuff. People have lost 100 pounds, they have turned around broken relationships, they’ve gone from bankruptcy to wealth. These things happen and they can happen for you, but it requires doing things differently than you’re doing them. The first step is believing it’s possible. The next step is getting hel
Jul 25, 2022 • 15:05
Episode 360 - The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - When Someone Hijacks a Confrontation
In this highlight from the podcast, Dr. Cloud dives into an all-too common problem during confrontations: Hijacking. We’ve probably all had this happen at least once. Someone has done something that needs to be addressed and when we confront them they externalize it: it’s about someone else, or some other thing that happened. The problem is no longer in the room, and as we all know, you can’t fix a problem that’s not in the room. Another thing they might do is turn into the victim and shut down.
Jul 18, 2022 • 15:39
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - How to Hate Well
The word “hate” triggers lots of thoughts in most people, but there are good types of hate. It’s good to hate depression, poverty, lies, violence and so on. In fact, what we hate can actually define us in positive ways. At the core of this talk, Dr. Cloud points out that while hating is a very natural human emotion, it needs to be done the right way. We have an upcoming workshop called Getting Over Trauma on August 30th at 5pm Pacific! Dr. Cloud will help you identify your traumatic injuries,
Jul 13, 2022 • 18:53
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - The Big Divide of Love and Limits
There are two parallel tracks that run through just about everything we do: Love and Truth, or put another way–Love and Structure–or yet another Love and Limits. To get the good out of something we need to apply a structure, a method, a limit, but we need to do it lovingly. This applies broadly in life. Not just in how we treat others, but also in how we talk to ourselves. When you fail at something, do you give yourself feedback with love? Probably not. That’s the big divide. Get Love and Limit
Jul 9, 2022 • 21:56
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - Practicing Happiness
What does happiness mean to you? 90% of it comes from things other than circumstances. We don’t have a lot of control over the circumstances in our lives, but we do have control over our practices and routines. No matter what circumstances happen to you, winning the lottery, buying something you’ve always wanted, whatever it is, you’ll come back to your set-point of happiness. Happy people put practices in their lives that lead to their set-point of happiness increasing, and you can too. So what
Jun 24, 2022 • 25:45
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - The Law of Respect
In this highlight from the podcast, Dr. Cloud comes back to a foundational, but oft overlooked aspect of boundaries. The Law of Respect. When we want people to respect our boundaries we in turn have to respect theirs, and it’s not easy. We have to learn to love and respect people’s “no’s.” It’s one of the hardest parts about setting boundaries. We have an upcoming workshop on Narcissism on June 28th at 5pm Pacific! If you can't attend live, don't worry, you can stream the recording as much as
Jun 18, 2022 • 14:58
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - The Fear Gap
In this highlight Dr. Cloud talks about the gap between where we are now and where we want to be. It’s often fear that prevents us from getting where we want to be. Each person's fears are different. How are you afraid, and what does your reaction to fear look like? Dr. Cloud talks about how to find what those fears are in the different parts of your life. Got a narcissist in your life? Not sure what to do? Then you're in luck! We have an upcoming workshop on Narcissism on June 28th at 5pm Pac
Jun 7, 2022 • 16:37
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - How Do You Stop People-Pleasing?
In this highlight from the show, Dr. Cloud addresses why we worry about people not liking us. It’s fine to be concerned about what people close to you think, but not everyone. If we can’t differentiate between who matters to us and who doesn’t, then anyone can affect us. We’ll start people-pleasing with everybody. The solution is not a solo-event. While there is some work one can do on their own to rewire their thinking, what matters is spending time in healing relationships. That could be a the
Jun 4, 2022 • 15:31
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - Getting a Parent to Seek Therapy
In this highlight from the podcast, Dr. Cloud answers a frequently asked question about getting a parent to seek therapy. For people of faith, belief in the power of prayer can sometimes prevent them from seeking professional therapy. When someone says it’s all just psycho-babble, the Bible says otherwise. We need help from others, for grieving, for addiction, for depression, and so much more, and the Bible backs that up. Got a narcissist in your life? Not sure what to do? Then you're in luck!
Jun 1, 2022 • 15:34
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - Changing Emotionally Unhealthy Patterns
In this highlight from the podcast, Dr. Cloud answers a written question: How do I get started changing emotionally unhealthy patterns? The first step to breaking an unhealthy pattern is recognizing and owning the need to change it. Following that, we need to become comfortable with it taking some time. Unhealthy patterns are not changed overnight. Healing takes time, and growth takes time. Changing a pattern is not the same as fixing a problem. Patterns recur, problems are incidental. Which lea
May 26, 2022 • 12:37
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - The Myth of Self-Help
In this highlight from the podcast Dr. Cloud dispels the myth of “self-help.” All help comes from outside ourselves. We have to get out of our closed circle in order to break through and learn new things. But advice is cheap, and you can get it anywhere. You have to turn to people that have the skills, energy and or intelligence to really help you. Whatever gap you want to close in your life, try doing it on your own, but realize that you may need help. When you learn that you’re not in a closed
May 25, 2022 • 12:48
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - A Lack of Follow-Through vs. Over Commitment
In this highlight from the show, Dr. Cloud talks about follow-through. We all commit ourselves to getting things done. Whether that’s helping out a friend, or telling our spouse we’ll do something, whatever it may be. When we fail to get those things done, we might think it’s because we lacked follow-through. But is that it? A lack of follow-through implies that something could have been done but we failed to execute for some reason. In many instances the issue isn’t the follow-through, it’s com
May 19, 2022 • 16:55
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - Balancing Togetherness and Separateness
In this highlight from the podcast, Dr. Cloud talks about why relationships require togetherness and separateness. You might have attachment issues, or anxiety issues. You might interpret separateness as abandonment. You might be feeling controlled because you don't have enough personal time. Start by asking yourself if you’re spending too much time together, or too much time apart. If you don’t have any togetherness, you don’t have a relationship. If you don’t have any separateness, you’re enme
May 18, 2022 • 16:15
Episode 348 - The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - The Toxicity of Triangulation in Relationships
In this highlight from the podcast, Dr. Cloud talks about how damaging triangulation can be in relationships. Triangulation is a common and often destructive problem in relationships in families, friendships, working relationships. When a conflict arises between two people, a third party is often brought in, unintentionally or intentionally, to ease the tension and pain. We’re not talking about professional counseling here or having a third person there for the conversation. That's one thing. Bu
May 13, 2022 • 12:51
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - Beware of Your Automatic Tendencies
In this highlight from the show, Dr. Cloud talks about our automatic tendencies in conflicts. Our default tendencies aren’t always so productive, fruitful or stellar. Sometimes they stem from conflicts or trauma and often do us a disservice. Dr. Cloud talks Dr. Karen Horney’s way of breaking down these tendencies into categories. Our automatic tendencies fall into one of three modes: Moving Towards, Moving Against, and Moving Away. The first step is figuring out what your default tendency is, an
May 11, 2022 • 15:07
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - Taking the First Steps Towards Resolving Conflicts
In this highlight Dr. Cloud talks about the path to finding peace. When we know we’re right in a conflict, it’ll often prevent us from making peace with the other party. How can we be bigger people and begin the process of reconciliation? You’re not just doing it for their sake, you’re doing it for yours too. Got a narcissist in your life? Not sure what to do? Then you're in luck! We have an upcoming workshop on Narcissism on June 28th at 5pm Pacific! If you can't attend live, don't worry, you
May 7, 2022 • 17:01
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - Small Decisions, Big Consequences
In this short highlight from the podcast, Dr. Cloud addresses the old saying that a person's character becomes their destiny. It's often the little things, the small decisions, that over time become our habits. These habits become patterns, which become our identity and character. Got a narcissist in your life? Not sure what to do? Then you're in luck! We have an upcoming workshop on Narcissism on June 28th at 5pm Pacific! If you can't attend live, don't worry, you can stream the recording as mu
May 5, 2022 • 15:37
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - The Importance of Practicing Gratitude
In this highlight from from the podcast, Dr. Cloud talks about why we need to practice gratitude to lead our best life. Psychologists researching happiness have found that practicing gratitude is crucial for a happy and fulfilling life. So how can we do it more often and more meaningfully? Got a narcissist in your life? Not sure what to do? Then you're in luck. We have an upcoming workshop on Narcissism on June 28th at 5pm Pacific! If you can't attend live, don't worry, you can stream the reco
Apr 30, 2022 • 26:44
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - How Automatic Thoughts Affect Our Lives
In this highlight from the podcast Dr. Cloud talks about how automatic thoughts are different from normal thinking. These automatic thoughts greatly affect our mood and outlook on life. So how can we avoid the spiral of negative thinking that they often cause? Got a narcissist in your life? Not sure what to do? Then you're in luck. We have an upcoming workshop on Narcissism on June 28th at 5pm Pacific! If you can't attend live, don't worry, you can stream the recording as much as you like.Earl
Apr 28, 2022 • 20:34
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - Why Are You Letting That Bother You?
In this short highlight from the podcast Dr. Cloud talks about the importance of getting back to what really matters in life. We often find ourselves stressed out about the wrong things. Reprioritizing and remembering what matters gets us back on track. Got a narcissist in your life? Not sure what to do? Then you're in luck. We have an upcoming workshop on Narcissism on June 28th at 5pm Pacific! If you can't attend live, don't worry, you can stream the recording as much as you like. Early bird
Apr 23, 2022 • 15:38
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Shorts - Anger is a Signal, Not a Solution
In this highlight from The Dr. Cloud Show, how can we become more comfortable with anger? Anger isn’t correct in anything other than signaling that something is wrong. When we can see that it's a signal to investigate, rather than an instruction to respond we can react well. Got a narcissist in your life? We have an upcoming workshop on Narcissism on June 28th at 5pm Pacific! Early bird pricing is available for a limited time. To find out more about it go to Boundaries.me/Narcissism. Get a fre
Apr 19, 2022 • 18:06
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - Forgiveness Does Not Require Trust
In this short from The Dr. Cloud Show, forgiveness does not require us trusting someone to give it. Forgiveness is free, trust is earned. We often get hung up thinking that forgiving someone means that we'll trust them again. They're not the same thing. Got a narcissist in your life? We have an upcoming workshop on Narcissism on June 28th at 5pm Pacific! Early bird pricing is available for a limited time. To find out more about it go to Boundaries.me/Narcissism. Get a free 14 day trial to B
Apr 15, 2022 • 20:19
The Dr. Cloud Show - Shorts - How the Guilt Cycle Holds You Back
In this short highlight from The Dr. Cloud Show, what can we do to break the cycle of guilt? There is self-condemnation that keeps us stuck, and there’s remorse that can move us forward. The big delusion is that guilt keeps people in check, and it doesn’t. It makes them act out more and keeps the cycle going. It doesn’t help. Dr. Cloud's upcoming workshop Mentally Healthy Faith is a two hour workshop covering how your mental health and your spiritual life intertwine. It’s live on April 12th at
Apr 11, 2022 • 18:50
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Shorts - Relinquishing Victimhood
In this short from The Dr. Cloud Show, how do we relinquish a victimhood mentality and regain control over our lives? You have to re-own that you have the power of choice. You may have been powerless over what happened, but you can’t internalize that powerlessness. Dr. Cloud's upcoming workshop Mentally Healthy Faith is a two hour workshop covering how your mental health and your spiritual life intertwine. It’s live on April 12th at 5pm Pacific, and you can stream the recording as much as you
Apr 8, 2022 • 15:57
Episode 337 - The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Learning That You Can Learn
In this short from The Dr. Cloud Show, overcoming obstacles can seem nearly impossible when we don't know what to do, or where to start. We often forget that we can learn new things we don't yet know. When we learn that we can learn is when we begin making progress. Share this with anyone that's stuck in a rut. Dr. Cloud's upcoming workshop Mentally Healthy Faith is a two hour workshop covering how your mental health and your spiritual life intertwine. Find out more about how to attend live an
Apr 7, 2022 • 11:12
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Shorts - Confirmation Bias Keeps Us Stuck
In this short from The Dr. Cloud Show, why are you stuck repeating the same patterns, especially with difficult people in your life? How does confirmation bias keep us trapped in dysfunctional situations? What can you do to get out of it? Dr. Cloud's upcoming workshop Mentally Healthy Faith is a two hour workshop covering how your mental health and your spiritual life intertwine. Find out more at www.boundaries.me/faith Get a free 14 day trial to Boundaries.me with over 90 video courses, daily
Apr 5, 2022 • 19:35
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Shorts - Find the Misery and Make a Rule
Welcome to Shorts! These are quick podcasts that cover a subject we here on the team think is worth highlighting. This one is called Find the Misery and Make a Rule. Share it with anyone that's banging their head against the wall! Dr. Cloud's upcoming workshop Mentally Healthy Faith is a two hour workshop covering how your mental health and your spiritual life intertwine. Discounted pricing is available for a until April 4th at www.boundaries.me/faith Get a free 14 day trial to Boundaries.me
Apr 1, 2022 • 15:16
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Special Edition: Spotlight on Negative Thinking
On this special edition of the podcast we are shining the spotlight on Negative Thinking. Dr. Cloud shares his thoughts and insights on how to break negative thinking patterns and end the negative self talk and self criticism that we all fall prey to. Jennifer is having difficulty letting go of negative thought patterns. How can she let go of regrets about her past that battle her positive feelings about herself? Hannah is also trying to move on from her past mistakes. When self criticisms d
Mar 31, 2022 • 49:53
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Special Edition: Spotlight on Anxiety
In this special edition of the podcast we're focusing the spotlight on anxiety. Dr. Cloud talks about the difference between a gut instinct protecting us from danger, and anxiety preventing us from doing what we should. Darlene has anxiety. What can she do to change her mental dialogue that leads her to anxiousness? Erin needs help with her anxiety around her parents. They fight all the time. How can she embrace the anxiety she has when she's around them? How can "Decatastrophizing" the si
Mar 29, 2022 • 55:17
Episode 332 - The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Special Edition: A Spotlight on Narcissism
In this special edition of the podcast we spotlight Dr. Cloud’s insights on the subject of narcissism. Dr. Cloud's introduction covers the over-attribution of narcissism, what it is, and what it is not. Shelly is seeing signs of narcissism in a man she's dating. She want to know: Can narcissists change? Hayley has a narcissistic mom. She's been "gray rocking" her and it's working, but her sisters don't practice it. Dr. Cloud discusses how all narcissists are not the same and there isn't on
Mar 25, 2022 • 1:01:55
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - The Forty Percent Rule - 3-4-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Question: According to my spouse, I'm struggling with balancing priorities in my marriage. We both work and I spend my free time on the golf course. This seems to create conflict in our marriage. I only play on the weekend. How can I balance work, golf, and my marriage? Question: Our daughter and her boyfriend have been dating for two years. They met in college. Both of them graduate in May with mechanical engineering degrees. They're discussing marriag
Mar 23, 2022 • 57:32
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Mistakes Are Best Read as Short Stories, Not Sequels - 3-3-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Question: How do you separate being a helpmate to your spouse versus being an enabler? How can you let them own their responsibilities and help them with kindness and love? Anne is in couples counseling. Her counselor wants her to validate some pretty crazy feelings that her husband is having. It makes her uncomfortable. How can she balance out participating and boundaries? Question: How can I have more balanced friendships? I tend to be the listener
Mar 21, 2022 • 55:27
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Your Two Brains - 2-25-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Question: I am recovering from a bad relationship. I feel like I've come a long way but now I'm surprised by how much I miss him and the good times we had. Aside from therapy, what can I do for myself? Lynn is feeling disconnected from her family and is learning about ambivalent attachment. What are Dr. Cloud's thoughts on ambivalent attachment? Question: A bad relationship from my past wired me to be different. Can you talk to us about how to rewire
Mar 18, 2022 • 56:00
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Resolving Guilt - 2-16-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Cheri wants to know: Do narcissists know what they're doing or are they unaware of it? Is it automatic for them to be manipulative, like a defense mechanism? Is there a way to make them see it? Question: What's the difference between shame and guilt? Question: Disapproval triggers me and I'm hard on myself about it. I'm married with kids yet I still feel like a child. How do I get my needs met without feeling afraid and more insecure? Dr. Cloud's up
Mar 16, 2022 • 40:05
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - internal World External Reality - 2-15-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Katherine wonders if she's an "unsafe" person, and if so, what can she do about it? Question: How do I get over the guy I was in love with? We agreed to go separate ways because we want different things. It's been two weeks. I can't stop thinking about him. It makes me sick thinking about him with another woman. Laurel's mother died recently. Her sister thinks she betrayed her when she didn't and the sister refuses to talk to her. She wants to keep h
Mar 15, 2022 • 55:45
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - It's Not Always a Straight Line - 2-9-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Question: My husband and I are struggling in our relationship with his mother. When we put small boundaries in place, she gets upset and reacts with passive aggressiveness and tries to make us feel guilty. How do we create a healthy relationship with her? Question: What are some good questions you can ask someone on a first date to really get to know their character? Question: I struggle with letting my 23-year-old daughter face possible consequences.
Mar 11, 2022 • 54:58
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Getting Into Flow - 2-7-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Question: I am seeing a guy who tells me he isn't looking for a relationship, but he always talks to me and makes time for me every day. Could this guy be lying about what he really wants? Question: I have become a self-righteous witch to my husband. We have been in couples counseling for a year. The therapist says my husband is conflict avoidant and he now uses that as an excuse. What can I do to handle the conflict avoidant behavior without ending my
Mar 9, 2022 • 1:01:53
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - How Do You Look at Failure? - 2-2-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Question: I am mustering the energy and patience necessary to be a stay at home mom to three kids under seven years old. I have the hardest time not being an absolutely horrible person to my kids especially when I'm sleep deprived. Dow you have any advice? Annalisa is naturally hard on herself. She's in therapy for it. Her self-critical ways have rubbed off on her son. What can she do to help herself and her son stop the self-criticism? Question: Lear
Mar 4, 2022 • 42:02
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Love and Limits Are Not Enemies - 1-27-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Our call system ran into some issues on this episode so all of the questions below were written-in during the live chat on YouTube and Facebook. If your future sister-in-law tells you that boundaries are unbiblical and that Christians are to instruct and rebuke one another, are boundaries worth discussing with her? She’s telling my fiancé and me how to live our lives: how many times to attend church, what are sexual activities need to be, what we should
Mar 2, 2022 • 1:09:17
Episode 322 -The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Follow-Through May Not Be The Problem - 1-26-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Question: Is it possible to rebuild trust with someone who has a personality disorder, like BPD, a learning disability like ADHD or some other developmental disability? Question: As it relates to follow-through, who is the "irresponsible" one if we keep accepting checks from the repeat "bouncers?" Is it the person who accepts the check, or the person who writes the check that bounces? Bethany's 22 year old daughter eloped. She got upset because she ga
Feb 28, 2022 • 1:14:14
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Relationships Require Togetherness and Separateness - 1-25-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Question: What's the best way to change the narrative with a person who disguises control and manipulation as helpfulness and advice? I've run out of ways to say "no thanks!" and they won't stop! Sarah has been processing her codependent ways and making real progress. How do can she get back to a "baseline" and what does that look like ? How can she become a healthy giver without reverting to her codependent tendencies? Rebecca is a career teacher and
Feb 24, 2022 • 1:27:03
Episode 320 - The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Blind Desire - 1-24-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Question: Could you explain cognitive dissonance? Question: What is protective structure? Marie isn't sure if she's enabling her brother. He's living out of a van but he's got a job. What plan could she put into place to assist him without creating dependency? Kris's family of origin has trouble controlling their anger. The blow up all the time. She's forgiven them but it keeps happening. How can she deal with them in a positive manner when tempers
Feb 23, 2022 • 1:07:20
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Triangulation in Relationships - 1-21-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Julie's family left their church a year ago and started attending a new church remotely. They're ready to start attending a church locally but don't know what they're looking for. How do they start their search? Question: If triangulation is an issue in my family of origin, how do I resolve it? I am the one everyone talks about. What do I do? Question: Is couples therapy considered Triangulation? Cindy has a triangulation question. She has a family
Feb 21, 2022 • 55:24
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Judge Not - 1-20-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Isabel has a friend that is depressed. She wants to be supportive but her friend is extremely isolated due to Covid restrictions of family she lives with. What can she do to lift her spirits? Question: Am I "judging" my daughter when I ask her to go to counseling? She has addictions. I try to encourage without enabling her. What's the difference between evaluation and judgment? Question: What is the best way to tell my 30 year old daughter she may ha
Feb 18, 2022 • 1:11:52
Episode 317 - The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Beware of Your Tendencies - 1-19-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Donna is feeling stuck in her marriage after 38 years. They're basically roommates at this point. She's running on an empty love-tank. What can she do to keep her emotional and mental health going? Question: If I'm dating a person and he tells me that he's dating other people should I continue dating him? He's still on a dating site. Christie needs help navigating her relationship with her in-laws without it affecting her marriage. If it were up to h
Feb 16, 2022 • 1:14:41
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - The Doctrine of Justification - 1-17-2022
On this episode of The Dr Cloud Show: Question: How do you make dating fun? I feel like it's such an obligation for me. After a first date I always feel like things are more transactional where we measure up our accomplishments and it's disheartening. Question: I have a friend that I want to reconnect with but I'm not sure if, or how, I should. We used to date and he wants to date again. Michelle from Australia is in a relationship with a man that lost his wife two years ago. How can she n
Feb 14, 2022 • 59:01
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - We Gravitate Toward The Familiar - 1-14-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Question: How do I overcome my fear of online dating? Susan's needs to set a boundary with her husband. He is "best friends" with a single woman and talks to her all the time. How can she draw the line? Marie gets anxious when she's around her mom because she's verbally abusive. How can she stop taking on responsibility for her mom's feelings? Question: How do I overcome the fear of talking about the past with my parents? Question: You've just tal
Feb 11, 2022 • 1:08:51
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Self and Other: Object Relationship - 1-12-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: A listener wrote: Is it good to remain friends after a breakup? Are there guidelines that may help? Does proper healing mean total separation from your ex? A listener wrote: What advice do you have to help me act like an ex-wife while I'm still living with my ex-husband? I'm unemployed and can't afford to move. Kay's daughter is awaiting disability payments. She doesn't want to give her daughter any money that might enable further bad choices. How can
Feb 9, 2022 • 1:19:00
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Adjust and Adapt - 1-11-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: A live viewer wrote: What does a mentally healthy person get from prayer? A live viewer wrote: Grappling with whether divorce is the right thing to do according to God's will. Am I listening to the will of God? Jenny feels like she has talents she's not using. How can she get out of her own way and start accomplishing her goals? Sue was physically abused by her ex-husband. How can she rebuild her trust and confidence around men? She gets triggered e
Feb 7, 2022 • 1:24:44
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Intrinsic vs Extrinsic - 1-10-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: A live viewer wrote: Should we knowingly date a person who has been tested as a psychopath? A live viewer wrote: How do you share the fights and arguments you're having at with your spouse without it leading to triangulation? Jackie is working her way through postpartum depression. Whenever she feels like she's making progress she begins losing trust in her counselor and herself. How can she stop letting her doubts control the process? A live viewer
Feb 3, 2022 • 1:10:01
The Dr. Cloud Show - More or Less - 1-7-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: In the context of dating, how do you know if someone likes you for who you really are? Are there signs or behaviors to look for? Starr's husband is a recovering alcoholic. He has become extremely lazy. She doesn't know how much of it is from brain damage, or whether she can hold him accountable. A listener wrote in asking about how much she should share with her three adult children about their father after their recent divorce. He's been bad mouthing
Feb 2, 2022 • 1:14:32
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Taking The First Step - 1-6-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: How do you trust someone if you never know when they're telling the truth? Can you look at facts and actions instead? Florence has forgiven her mom for how she was treated as child, but her mom hasn't really changed. She's not sure how forgiveness works. Should she just sweep this under the rug or is there a different path to forgiving her that will lead to some changes? Robin is internalizing her anger with her dysfunctional bosses. they make a big d
Jan 31, 2022 • 1:16:52
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Watch The Little Things - 1-5-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Hannah is trying to move on from past mistakes and forgive herself. She keeps dredging up the past and it's stopping her from growing. What techniques can she use to dispute her negative thoughts? Lily wants to know how to "radically embrace" herself. She often only presents certain parts of herself the the world and she'd like to live more fully and openly. Referring to a back to a conversation on creating habits, an audience member wrote in asking a
Jan 27, 2022 • 54:11
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Beware of Your Obstacles - 1-4-2022
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Sherry is trying to reconcile with family and wants to take the emotions out of it. She feels the need to appeal to the emotional aspects of their problems. It's exhausting and painful. Is there a healthier way to go about reconciling? Written Question: When people you're close to cross your boundaries, is it too harsh to not want contact? Benjamin's wife is distrustful of him in the most important areas like his love and faithfulness to her and in th
Jan 26, 2022 • 1:12:49
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Making Your Goals Happen - 12-31-2021
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Patty wants to know if the person she's dating is the right person to marry. She needs to know better how she's feeling. What's the right way to have that conversation with him? What makes a good accountability partner? Ryan is suffering from depression. He's seeing a therapist and it isn't going great. What's an effective strategy for finding a good therapist? A viewer wrote in asking about goal setting. They want to get out of debt and lose weight
Jan 24, 2022 • 1:29:18
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Look Forward With a Hopeful Vision - 12-29-2021
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Rebecca wants to know some techniques for being more like herself in front of men she's attracted to. She gets anxious and becomes less of her confident self. Trying to reconnect with her passions in life, Collette, 65, is looking for tips to start her journey of self discovery. Margot started a fast friendship with a guy. She says it's not romantic. They're close but he's backed away and she doesn't know why. How can she find out why he's gone cold?
Jan 22, 2022 • 1:20:53
Episode 305 - The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Looking Back With Kind Eyes - 12-27-2021
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: A viewer wrote in when we were live asking about their binge eating problem. They need help getting to the root of the problem. Shanna has a mother-in-law that has relied on her and her husband as an emotional crutch for years. How can they remain compassionate while setting boundaries about not being a parent to their parent? Katherine's boyfriend is a recovering alcoholic that relapsed. What's her role and what boundaries can she use to protect hers
Jan 19, 2022 • 1:13:01
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - It Takes A Village - 12-22-2021
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Brenda can't decide whether to contact her ex-boyfriend. He's ill and she doesn't know what the right thing is to do. Their relationship ended because of toxic behaviors. Sandy's son-in-law has PTSD. He's a flight paramedic and sees the worst types of accidents. Sandy really wants to help him by not triggering him or making matters worse when they visit. What can she do to be a comforting person when she's around him? Kelly is getting ready for the ho
Jan 17, 2022 • 1:04:48
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Focus On The Inside - 12-21-2021
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: A viewer of the show wrote in asking about the difference between reacting and responding. When we react to another person, they're in control. When we respond, we're in control. Dr. Cloud provides examples. Jessica is estranged from her brother. When she expressed her feelings to him, he put up a wall. It's been a year since they last talked. She's fine with the situation but their mom isn't. How can she get her mom to stop persisting with their reconc
Jan 14, 2022 • 1:09:22
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Use Fewer Words - 12-20-2021
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Melissa's job brings her into people's homes. How can she set boundaries with people that see her like family? What do you do about an impatient spouse? Is sarcasm ever a good thing? What is the difference between love and respect? Chris and Kristen sent a letter to his mom about boundaries and it backfired. Get a free 14 day trial to Boundaries.me with over 90 video courses, daily coaching emails and more. Go to www.boundaries.me to start your free tr
Jan 12, 2022 • 1:06:59
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - You Can't Please Everyone - 12-17-2021
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Elaine has questions about the right way to encourage her husband to grow. Lance is dating a long time friend. Her words are kind, but her actions are cold. How can he get past her walls? David runs an adult bible study. A common problem they have is about how to detach from their adult kids. Get a free 14 day trial to Boundaries.me with over 90 video courses, daily coaching emails and more. Go to www.boundaries.me to start your free trial.
Jan 10, 2022 • 1:17:32
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Pruning - 12-16-2021
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Jennifer has a calling to help people and needs help deciding which direction to take. Christine can't let go of being a parent to her son who is now an adult. It's affecting her relationships outside the family. How do we create structure for our lives and establish healthy routines? Get a free 14 day trial to Boundaries.me with over 90 video courses, daily coaching emails and more. Go to www.boundaries.me to start your free trial.
Jan 7, 2022 • 59:20
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Empathy, Trust and The Golden Rule - 12-15-2021
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Kevin wants to know himself better. How can he unpack why he thinks and feels the way he does? Sheree has been married twice and doesn't trust her judgment with men. How can she know when she's ready to date again? Lisa had a bad experience with a therapist and wants help finding one better suited for her. Get a free 14 day trial to Boundaries.Me with over 90 video courses, daily coaching emails and more. Go to www.boundaries.me to start your free trial.
Jan 5, 2022 • 1:04:35
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - 20/20 Vision 12-10-2021
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: How do you handle yourself according to biblical principles through a divorce. Nicole has been dating a guy that wants to be exclusive but is ghosting her now. How are Childhood Emotional Neglect and codependency related? Thought on the enneagram and its usefulness. Matt's wife is emotionally distant and it's affecting his ability to perform at work and at home. Get 14 days of free access to Dr. Cloud's coaching site! Go to www.boundaries.me to get fr
Jan 3, 2022 • 58:35
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Know Why You're Saying Yes - 12-9-2021
Our biggest sale of the year is on right now until the end of the month! Save on workshops, annual subscriptions and more! Go to www.boundaries.me to see all our special offers! On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Rebecca's son approached her about setting boundaries but then didn't set any. How do you break the cycle of saying yes for fear of a negative response? Cindy got intimate too quickly with a narcissist. Samantha has a four year old that's taking on the role of the parent.
Dec 29, 2021 • 1:06:43
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - True Confessions - 12-08-2021
Our biggest sale of the year is on right now until the end of the month! Save on workshops, annual subscriptions and more! Go to www.boundaries.me to see all our special offers! On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Brittany loves her boyfriend, but his family is causing problems. They've broken up all of his past relationships. What is the difference between causing drama and having a voice? What do you do when grudges aren't forgiven? Patty is suffering complex grief and it's affecting h
Dec 27, 2021 • 1:04:39
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Taking on Others Responsibility - 12-7-2021
Our biggest sale of the year is on right now until the end of the month! Save on workshops, annual subscriptions and more! Go to www.boundaries.me to see all our special offers! Joe had an emotional affair and it blew up his life. How can he get things back on track? Lance is dating his best friend and it's not fulfilling. How can he talk to her about the issues in their relationship, or are they just not romantically compatible?
Dec 22, 2021 • 46:21
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - How a Sad Face Can Bring Opportunity - 12-6-2021
Our biggest sale of the year is on right now until the end of the month! Save on workshops, annual subscriptions and more! Go to www.boundaries.me to see all our special offers! On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Dotty has been diagnosed with Bipolar 2. How can she discern what she can work on, and what is part of the disorder? How does sexual dysfunction mirror other dysfunctions in life? JT feels forced to have a relationship with her brother's girlfriend and it's leading to division.
Dec 20, 2021 • 1:13:42
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Have a Finish Line - 12-3-2021
Our biggest sale of the year is on right now until the end of the month! Save on workshops, annual subscriptions and more! Go to www.boundaries.me to see all our special offers! On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: How do you stand up for yourself at work? Misty is on a healing journey but feels empty unless helping others. Lexi is working the dating program but gets discouraged with all the failed dates. Jacquelyne's sister is back in her life. Is a healthy relationship is possible?
Dec 15, 2021 • 1:19:06
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Find The Misery, Make A Rule - 12-2-2021
Our biggest sale of the year is on right now until the end of the month! Save on workshops, annual subscriptions and more! Go to www.boundaries.me to see all our special offers! On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Alicia wants to stop carrying old family patterns into the future. How set boundaries with a parent and not feel guilt? Samantha has child with an agnostic and doesn't know if it's a dealbreaker. Suzanne was betrayed. Her best friend had an affair with her husband and married hi
Dec 13, 2021 • 1:18:30
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Reclaiming Territory 12-1-2021
Our biggest sale of the year is on right now until the end of the month! Save on workshops, annual subscriptions and more! Go to www.boundaries.me to see all our special offers! On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: April has anxiety about seeing her in-laws and her husband isn't helping things. How do you set boundaries with your mom in a loving way? Shannon doesn't know if she wants to be friends or in a romantic relationship with her partner. How can you be supportive and not become cod
Dec 8, 2021 • 1:07:20
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Written Questions - 11-30-2021
Our biggest sale of the year is on right now until the end of the year! Save on workshops, annual subscriptions and more! Go to www.boundaries.me to see all our special offerings! On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show written questions cover: What do you do when family members trigger you? What is gaslighting and how can you handle it? How do you find the right church? How do you help a child emotionally regulate? Is reparenting a good type of therapy for you?
Dec 6, 2021 • 1:04:27
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Gratitude is a Transformative Force - 11-24-2021
Our biggest sale of the year is on right now at www.boundaries.me! Save on workshops, subscriptions and more! On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Jessica wants to break some bad relational patterns with her mom and establish a healthy new foundation. Erin has friend that uses boundaries more like walls. How can she have a conversation about avoiding her triggers?
Dec 1, 2021 • 1:02:31
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Preparing for Time With Family- 11-23-2021
Head over to www.boundaries.me for the best offers we have all year. You'll find deals on subscriptions and gifts on all types of content. On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Briana is feeling discouraged in the workplace and wants minimize her negative self-talk. Sarah wants to have a holiday free of political talk. Shauna and her ex-husband need to get on the same page about raising their daughter.
Nov 29, 2021 • 1:07:45
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Normalizing Recovery - 11-22-2021
We have a huge sale coming up starting on Black Friday, November 26th! Go to www.boundaries.me to find out more about all of the deals and new offerings! On this episode of the Dr. Cloud Show: Charity has been making good progress with her marriage and wants to know the next steps. Anne needs help with a sensitive daughter. How can she stay sensitive and not be easily offended? Danielle is worried she has narcissistic tendencies and that they've have led her away from her spirituality.
Nov 26, 2021 • 1:15:54
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Forgiveness and Trust - 11-11-2021
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Kay's mother has been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. What kind of healing does she need to do to better withstand her mother's behavior? Andrea wants to be less selfish. How can she go from a mindset of self preservation to a more selfless one? Head over to www.boundaries.me and get a free 14-day subscription. Get daily coaching videos from Dr. Cloud and access to 90+ courses.
Nov 23, 2021 • 55:29
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Divisiveness - 11-10-2021
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Elena is feeling a deep sense of loneliness, even around people that care about her. Leslie got out of a marriage and is getting asked out on dates. The idea of dating seems like drudgery. Becky has been struggling with her husband. They've been in counseling and nothing seems to resolve their issues. Head over to www.boundaries.me and get a free 14-day subscription. Get daily coaching videos from Dr. Cloud and access to 90+ courses.
Nov 17, 2021 • 1:03:43
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - When Does a Person Become an Adult? - 11-8-2021
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Sophie suffered abuse as a kid. Being around her family triggers her. Processing the pain seems to make things worse. When do you walk away from processing? Tina's husband can't get over her brother's betrayal. It's driving a wedge into their relationship. Get daily coaching videos from Dr. Cloud and access to 90+ courses. Head over to www.boundaries.me and get a free 14-day subscription.
Nov 15, 2021 • 1:01:04
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Automatic Thoughts - 11-5-2021
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Lynn comes from a dysfunctional family. After her father died, her mother left her son his watch, which he sold. How can she tell her? Michelle has been in counseling and wants to apologize to her kids for how she raised them. ZJ is a helper and recovering from codependency. How can she help--but not enable--her friend? Get daily coaching videos from Dr. Cloud and access to 90+ courses. Head over to www.boundaries.me and get a free 14-day subscription.
Nov 10, 2021 • 1:13:07
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - What Really Matters - 11-1-2021
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Nicole's mom is drastically overstepping her role as a grandparent. How can she get her mom to stop parenting her kids? Lysandra can't let go of a toxic relationship. She gets anxious thinking about seeing him. How can Vanessa manage her mother-in-law's unrealistic expectations about her duties? Get daily coaching videos from Dr. Cloud and access to 90+ courses. Head over to www.boundaries.me and get a free 14-day subscription.
Nov 8, 2021 • 1:03:07
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - Self and Other - 10-27-2021
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Nancy is looking to make amends with her son after divorcing. John is trying to heal his daughter's relationship with his ex-wife. Marcia's self esteem is suffering from past traumas. It's causing performance anxiety. Michelle's younger brother isn't going to school and her mom doesn't seem to know. How can she help? Get daily coaching videos from Dr. Cloud and access to 90+ courses.Head over to www.boundaries.me and get a free 14-day subscription.
Nov 3, 2021 • 1:11:56
The Dr. Cloud Show Live - On Going Maintenance - 10-19-2021
On this episode of The Dr. Cloud Show: Katie wants to open up communication with her husband. He doesn't like talking through conflicts. Amy has issues with how her husband's twin brother is treating him. How can she bring it up better? Nubia wants to help her grandchild out, but her son's marriage is on the rocks and helping might strain the relationship. Get daily coaching videos from Dr. Cloud and access to 90+ courses. Head over to www.boundaries.me and get a free 14-day subscription.
Nov 1, 2021 • 1:03:26
